I Wish You Knew [Haylor]

Chapter 4

"Harry, Anne is on the phone."

my mom talked to Harry. I'm still a mess, I'm still shocked. He called his mom. It's been a long time since I last saw her.

I went to the bathroom to cleaned mm face. I splash a water to my face. I saw my reflection in the mirror, it was dark. My eyes are puffy and red, my lips are swollen from me bitting my lips, dry tears on my cheeks, my hair is a mess. I look like hell.

"Taylor, honey."

My mom went to me. She looked at me and tuck a piece of my hair. I looked at her and shook my head.

"Harry is trying his best, honey. Give him a chance."

She rubs my shoulders and smiled at me sweetly. My face is expressionless.

"I don't want to force you, honey. Just think what's best for you."

She left the room. I saw my reflection again, mascara ruined.

"What have you become, Taylor Swift?"

I yelled at myself. It's crazy to think that I'm going too intense at myself. I punched the mirror making my fist bleed. It was a loud, loud noise.

"Taylor! What are you doing?"

A familiar voice came from the door. He ran to me and helped me lean to his body.  He catches me in his arm.

"What did you do..."

He carry me bridal-style and looked at me with his other hand holding my hand seeing my fist bleeds. I feel like I want to faint, i want to be unconscious but my body is still fighting.

He carry me to the bedroom and lie me down on the bed. He wiped my blood with his shirt, his white shirt that he loves. The white shirt with my mascara on it. And now blood is all over it.

I closed my eyes feeling sick, feeling in pain. Mentally in pain, I'm in pain. This is what pain feels like. He could hurt me in a blink of an eye.

I want to run away from his grip, I want to hide. But I can't, his emotion, his reaction, his expression is worried, scared. Is this really makes him scared?

Maybe this is the last time I'd be able to see him standing here, caring for me. Maybe he changed but his warm heart is still there, still here.

"Anne is gonna be here, today. She wants to see you. I don't want mom to see you like this, she'll kill me."

He joked, I grinned and sighed. The way he said mom. We used to call Anne mom, I used to call her mom. Harry used to call Andrea momma, it's basically a tradition for us both.

"Don't hurt yourself, Taylor. I knew you'll do this to yourself anytime soon and you did."

He sat on the edge of the bed beside me. His hand is on my fist wiping the blood.

"I met your boyfriend? Kaden yesterday."

He questioned the boyfriend part. My eyes got wider.

"He's not my boyfriend..."

I said quietly. Maybe he knows that he's not my boyfriend but he's being curious. I know he thinks that I never be able to get a new boyfriend. I never even dated anyone.

"I don't want a relationship nor a friendship."

I said sarcastically. The thing about friendship always broke my heart.

"I'm scared of getting one after..."

I couldn't say it. I know it'll hurt him, I don't want to hurt him. It's enough for both of us. I might hate him but I don't want to hurt him.

"I never want to leave you alone, Tay. You're the only one I have beside mom."

It is true, I'm the only one he has beside mom, Anne.

"You might think I forgot you with my ex-girlfriend and all of my friend but no, I never forget you."

He bows his head down. He cleared his troth and smiled at me. His smile always calms me down.

"I leave you alone now."

He walked around, he reached the door handle before he opens it. I interrupt him.

"Thank you..."

I said before he left the door. He nods without looking at me and closed the door gently.

"Give him a chance, Taylor. He's trying."

I whispered to myself. Do you ever feel like you're the worst person in the world? Because that's how I feel right now.