Through the looking glass

CHAPTER 30 (His thoughts)

DAMIEN

Wala sa plano ko ang masaktan si Katherine Lane. All I ever wanted was to take her away from that lunatic family of hers. Why lunatic? They keep on lying to her. They acted like the concerned family members but all they're after is to wed her to the Corpuzes. It's a huge slap to her face. Why? Inakala niyang mahal siya ng mga kapamilya niya. It hurts badly. It killed her.

She might've survived that suicide attempt but her heart did not. It died the moment she jumped to that building. Alam kong kasalanan ko din pero they played a major part on her depression. Kahit anong gawin nila ngayon, it would take a lifetime for her to recover emotionally.

I despise her family. Why? She worked so hard to become a doctor without their help and they destroyed that remaining pillar of hope she's holding onto. Ang akala niyang bumuo sa kanya ay pwedeng mawala. Dahil sa suicide attempt na 'yon, she's not fit to resume her position as a surgical resident.

It breaks my heart. Pinaghirapan niya 'yon at para kunin nila 'yon sa kanya ay napakasakit. The love of my life is shattered to pieces. The love of my life is suffering badly because of her evil family.

Except Ayesa. Like Katherine, Ayesa isn't emotionally stable. Like Katherine Lane, parang orphan na din si Ayesa. Her father is in a rehab facility overseas while her mother is such a horrible epitome of a loving parent. People see her as this horrible woman but deep inside, she's a lost child as well. She's scarred deeply and it affected her judgment in life. Hindi ko siya masisisi kung galit talaga siya kay Katherine Lane. In her world, siya kasi ang mang-aagaw, especially knowing that I am in love with her cousin.

Ayesa feels so betrayed right now, by me and her family. I am deeply ashamed of that. Nanakit ako ng dalawang babae. I made Ayesa hope of a family she always wanted while I found the lost flame of my heart. Katherine Lane hoped that we can be finally free. Yes, balak ko na siyang itakas pero sinira ito ng pamilya niya. They made her believe na kasalanan ang gagawin naming dalawa and that truth is still carved to her mind.

It's sad. Hindi man lang kami nabigyan ng tsansa. Why does fate have to be so cruel? Bakit kailangan may masaktan ng sobra? Katherine Lane suffered a lot since her parents died and from her cancer. She's a lost soul and I believe she is more lost than ever. Her spirit is probably fleeting somewhere else dahil wala na siyang ganang mabuhay. She lost the will to live and because of that, I too, want to die.

But I can't, she's alive and all I needed is to assure her that my absence will never happen. I will always be by her side no matter what it takes. Alam kong masasaktan si Ayesa but in love, there's always someone who's going to end up crying. Hindi ko na kayang makita siya umiiyak. Katherine made me hope of a brighter future. Akala ko noon mamamatay na lang ako pero I miraculously lived. Who would've thought the parasites in my brain would be gone? No one, but she did. Her smiles comforted the lost soul in me. Siya ang naging buhay ko and making her this miserable is far from what I wanted.

This love is ours. This love is mine. This is hers.

No one could ever trample this love.

"Jake! Gumising ka na!" Narinig ko si Ate Julia sa labas ng kwarto ko. Alam kong paranoid siya since malaman ang nagyari kay Katherine Lane.

"Yes, ate! Be there in a sec!" Bumangon ako para magsuot ng sweatpants at t-shirt at naghilamos na bago bumaba. Napaluwas ng Manila ang parents ko from San Isidro. Masyado silang nabigla sa nangyari kay Katherine Lane.

"Hijo, you should eat. Ang putla mo na. You should eat meat. Para ba saan ang mha niluluto ni manang kung kapirasong kanin at gulay lang anh kinakain mo? Payat ka na." Sabi ni mama habang nakaupo sa tabi ni papa.