A new beginning

.14.

I walk through the city, it is about twelve o'clock at night, I think. Suddenly I'm gripped by someone from behind. Startled, I turn. I want to scream when I look right in the eyes of Misha, but there comes no word from my mouth. Taylor and Raymond are getting involved too.

,,Well, look who's here." Raymond put a hand over my mouth so I can not scream loud and they drag me into the alley. ,,We haven't seen you in a while." Misha grins common and they come closer to me. My eyes are wide with fear. Taylor gives me a kick in the stomach, a stabbing pain remains, I bite my lip as tears keep burning behind my peripheral vision. But I know already if I'm going to cry, they do me more pain... Why always me? Why, why, why? What's wrong with me? Why do they always gossiping and bullying me? Why? I don't want to be here anymore. Never again. Not longer on this world, where everyone always give me strange looks as I walk by. I want to die...

I'm awakened from my dark thoughts by Misha give me a slap in the face. I go with my hand on my cheek and feel blood...

,,Stop! Leave me alone!" I cried in panic, but they ignore it. They continue for a while, while Raymond just look at everything that's happening to me, with his hands in his pockets. He's even grinning. I come with my head hard against the wall and a cry of pain escape my mouth. Everything is blurred and not long after that it's black in front of my eyes.

Sweaty I wake up and look around anxiously. My heart is pounding like crazy. But then I see that I'm just in my room. I sigh shaky and rub my hands over my face, wipe the sweat and take a sip of water from the bottle that is on my nightstand. This happens every night. I don't want those nightmares anymore, but I don't know how to made them go away. Maybe Chloe's right and do I need someone to talk to about my past. It's not only the bullying what's bothering me, but also my father. He hit on me as if I was a punching bag. Now I hear my phone and I see a message from Chloe. What does she want? Cancel again? I can't ignore the fact that she message me and open it.

Chloe: Becs, can you meet me in the garden? I want to talk to you...

What the hell? That sound serious. What's going on? Why does she want to talk and why is she cancel our daily routine again? Sighing I get up, wash my face with a washcloth and as soon as I have all my stuff for class, I walk out of my dorm towards the garden. What is the thing that Chloe want to discus?

,,So what's up?" I ask Chloe if we are sitting next to each other.

,,Well, I don't know how to say this." She's nervous as hell. I don't know why. ,,It's about our morning routine."
,,You want a new one?"

,,No, I love being with you at Starbucks but..."

,,But what? Chlo, please just say it already."

,,We can't do that anymore."

,,What?! Why not?"
,,Tom doesn't want me to hang out with you anymore."

,,And you are going to listen to him?"

,,I'm sorry Becs, but I'm –"

,,You can't explain it do you? Tom doesn't like me, that's why he doesn't want us to hang out. He thinks I want to steal you away from him is he?"
,,That's not the point."
,,Well, what is it then? Why don't you want me to be around you?"

,,It's not important what I think, Tom is way older than you and –"

,,So that means he can decide what we can do?"

,,I don't have a choice Beca!" Chloe is yelling right now. I see some tears are forming and I swallow. I don't want her to be sad and if I make her sad, than it's the best we don't have any contact anymore.

,,Chlo, I need you to be honest with me." She catch my eye and nod. ,,Am I making you sad? Did I hurt you in any way?"
,,No, you didn't."
,,Then what's the real reason you don't want to hang out anymore? I thought we were best friends, that we trusted each other."
,,I trust you, but I need you to trust me if I tell you that I do this because of you."

,,Because of me? I don't want to be apart. I love hanging out with you, for the first time in my life I'm actually happy. I have made friends and nobody is making fun of me. I'm a working progress, I know, but right now I don't understand."

,,That's too bad for you Beca!" Chloe is standing up. ,,I can't be friends with you anymore, deal with that!" And than she runs away. The tears are fulling my eyes. Why is she doing this to me? I don't get it! I start crying and hide my face in my hands.

,,Hé, what's wrong?" Benji is sitting next to me and put his arm around my shoulders.
,,Love." I only say.
,,Ah, love is a battlefield. It can kill you or love you."

,,Well, in my fact it kills me." I say crying.

,,Do you want to tell me?" I shake my head. Nobody needs to know about my feelings for Chloe and how she treated me just a minute ago. ,,Okay, well are you coming to class? You know that Miley Cyrus is coming today?"
,,Miley? Really?" He nod. ,,Well, I love to hear her sing."
,,Come on, maybe it's a distraction from your love problem." I nod, wipe my tears and follow Benji to the classroom. Miley is standing in front of the class talking to Mrs Gomez. She's so beautiful! My eyes are scanning the room and the only place I can sit is next to Chloe. Great! I sit next to her and sigh. This is going to be a long day.