A new beginning

.18.

,,Chlo, it's going to be fine. I'm staying here with you until we see the result." I grab her hand and see that she's scared. We are sitting in the schoolyard again by the way. The pregnancy test in the middle of us, out of sight.

,,Becs?"

,,Hmm?"

,,What if I am pregnant? How will Tom react?"

,,I don't know Chlo, but if he yell at you or be mad, than I will kick his ass."

,,I don't want to be pregnant, I don't even love him anymore. How can I raise a child with him if I don't love him? That's impossible right?"

,,Chlo, I know for sure that you're going to be a great mother. You're such a nice and bubbly person. Every child has to be happy to have you as there mother."

,,Aw thank you Becs, that's sweet." Chloe moves closer against me and put her head against my shoulder. My breathing soars and my body is hot. She never did this with me, yeah in my dreams, but not for real. She was always this close to Tom. I'm not complaining though, I wish she could sit like this every day with me. My heart beats like crazy and I doubt whether I should put my arm around her. ,,How long do we have to wait?"

,,I don't know, but according to the instructions you need to see one stripe and when you're not pregnant you need to see two stripes."

,,I'm nervous as hell."

,,Don't be. Pregnant or not, I am with you and will always help with things."

,,What can I do?"

,,For now, you only need to wait." Now I slightly put my arm around her shoulder. The fear is running through my veins. I don't want to do something she doesn't want, but Chloe don't say anything.

,,Thank you for being close to me and to comfort me." Chloe say after a while. I smile and feel a blush come to me cheeks.

,,Hé!" Chloe and I scare up and look to the right where the sound comes from. Tom looks at me with a menacing look on his face. I drop the test into Chloe's bag quickly and I feel that Chloe goes out of my arms and stand. ,,Stay the hell away from my girlfriend!" He yell at me.

,,Tom, stop. I needed someone and Beca was here for me."

,,No, I see how she looks at you!" He points towards me. ,,She is madly in love with you, therefore she is always with you!"

,,Tom!" Chloe shouts angrily at him. Now I stand up and grab her hand so she'll stop yelling at him.

,,Chloe, it's all good."

,,No, it's not!" Chloe looks towards Tom. ,,What the hell is wrong with you?! You do not need to feel threatened! Beca is not in love with me, we're just best friends! Beca and I can never be a couple, so stop!" Au, that comment stings. We can never be a couple? Really? Suddenly I feel less happy than this morning. Chloe can never love me! I'm madly in love with her, but she can't love me. I'm doomed. Please Miley, please let me go to Los Angeles.

,,Um, sorry but I'm going home." Chloe looks at me. Confused.

,,Wait, why are you going? Is it because of Tom?"

,,Yes and no. It's not important, I'm glad I could be there for you."

,,Are we going to eat tonight in this nice little restaurant around the corner?" I shake my head.

,,I don't think that's a good idea."

,,Why are you still talking to her?" Tom looks at Chloe and then to me. ,,Stay the hell away from her! She's my girlfriend, find a girlfriend of your own!"

,,She's straight!" Yells Chloe.

,,Oh no, she isn't. She's a dyke and she needs to stay away from you." Now Tom is pushing me. Now Chloe is getting mad, but before she can say something, I grab her hand again.

,,Chloe, it's okay. I'll get it. Maybe he's right and need I stay away from you. It's not a big deal, I'll be fine."

,,But Beca... "

,,No, stop Chlo. Don't make this any difficult. I'm fine, I've always been alone, so don't worry." After that I walk away from Tom and Chloe. 

I stand against the wall and feel like my breath is gone. The words Chloe said are still stinging into my chest. Beca and I can never be a couple, so stop! I thought she flirted with me, but I was wrong. I'm start to cry. I don't blame her you know. Chloe is only seeing the truth about me. I'm not beautiful. Nobody can love me, only pretending. What about my happiness? That happiness that mom told me about. "Beca, you are going to find that special someone who can fill your heart with love. You have to keep believing in yourself. If you keep doing that, everything is going to be okay. You are amazing just the way you are and I know for sure that one day somebody will see that to." I laugh about the thought.

,,When mom? When is somebody going to love me like you used to love me? I'm myself, but that's not enough. I'm not pretty, the bullying killed me inside, I can't look at myself without breaking the mirror, I'm not good enough for everybody. Even Chloe thinks I'm not good dating material. I'm just... I'm nothing!" I yell to the sky and start crying harder.

,,Beca?" O, great! Can I be more embarrassing? I'm crying my eyes out and now Miley has to come? I wipe my tears quick and when I know my tears are almost gone, I turn my head and look at her. ,,Are you okay?"

,,Yeah, I'm fine."

,,I don't believe you. You want to hide it, but I can see that you've been crying."

,,It's someone I like."

,,Come sit with me, than we can talk. I have some news for you to." I shrug my shoulders and walk with Miley to the bench, not for away. ,,So what happened?"

,,I was sitting with her and than she broke down crying. I comforted her. She told me that she thought she was pregnant and we just did a test."

,,Is she pregnant?"

,,I don't know. Her boyfriend came and scolded me. I'm used to it, because of my past of bullying, but it still hurts."

,,She didn't defend you? You where the only one to be with her in this difficult time right?"

,,I was, but she didn't defend me. I'm disappointed by that, but now I just want to disappear."

,,Well maybe a new start can help. I have the results of the auditions."

,,Sorry Miley, but I can't do audition."

,,Beca, I'll already have the results."

,,But you didn't have seen my performance yet."

,,Believe me, I have seen. I was in the auditorium when you where singing with that movie of your mother. I was feeling every word. You are good and I want to take you to Los Angeles with me."

,,Really?" Miley nods. ,,That's amazing! Now I can be away from her!"

,,If you're really in love with her, six months are not going to be enough to get over her, but it's a beginning. I'm glad I could help you relax a little, keep yourself safe. I'll see you tomorrow in class." Miley reach out for me and pull me into a hug. I enjoy the hug, but my mind is with her words. "if you're really in love with her, six months are not going to be enough", and I know she's right. I can't get over Chloe, because she's amazing. I'm hopelessly in love with her and I can never get over her!