Everything I Didn't say (Lashton)

It was always you

It had been a little over a week since Ashton and Jace started dating. Ashton was finding it harder to fake his feelings for Jace.

It was late one evening and Ashton found himself home alone. He didn't know where the other guys were but he assumed Calum and Michael were out together Liam and Zayn and he knew Braxton was staying with Camilla for the week in her hotel. He wasn't sure where Luke could have been but he secretly hoped he wasn't out with Niall. He thankfully hadn't seen the blonde since the day after he and Jace got together.

Luke walked into the house stopping short when he saw Ashton on the couch.

"I-is Jace here?" Luke asked glancing around for any evidence the the blonde was there. He was in no mood to see the two fawn over each other. Truth was he'd grown to hate Jace.

"No." Ashton shook his head.

"Oh, trouble in paradise?" Luke asked sensing Ashton's discomfort.

"No." Ashton snapped.

"Hey, don't get snappy with me, I was just asking." Luke frowned.

"Where have you been?" Ashton asked changing the subject.

"Nowhere." Luke shrugged.

Ashton felt his heart drop.

"With Niall then." Ashton responded knowing that's where he'd been.

"It's not what you think." Luke sighed.

"Isn't it though?" Ashton glowered.

"No, we met up for a couple beers then we went our separate ways." Luke answered.

"Oh is he on his period?" Ashton snarked.

"No." Luke snapped.

"I told him I wanted to stop." Luke answered quietly.

"Stop fucking each other? Why?" Ashton asked his tone full of attitude.

"What is your problem?" Luke barked. He was tired of Ashton acting this way.

"Nothing." Ashton snapped.

"Ever since we got back from Hawaii you act like I can't sleep with other people. I'm not yours to claim you know." Luke was pissed.

"You don't think I know that? I can't tell you how much it kills me knowing you're with him instead of me. I fucking hate hearing you say his name instead of mine. It takes everything in me not to pin you to a wall every time I see you." Ashton was now shouting.

"Why? I'm not some sex symbol." Luke frowned.

"Damn it, Luke you just don't get it do you? You do things to me no one else can." Ashton stepped closer to Luke.

"I fucking hate how you make me feel but I can't get enough of you." Ashton was now only a few inches from Luke who stood still as a board.

The two stood staring at each other for a moment when Ashton felt himself break. He grabbed Luke's hips pulling him into a deep kiss.

Luke grabbed Ashton's arms as he reciprocated the kiss.

The kiss was different than the other ones they'd shared. This one was slower, less needy and full of passion at least it felt that way to Ashton. As the two pulled away Ashton leaned his forehead on Luke's.

"God, I love you." Ashton sighed.

Luke snapped his head up to look at Ashton who realized what he'd just said.

"W-what did you say?" Luke asked backing away from Ashton.

"Nothing. I didn't say anything." Ashton lied his voice full of worry.

"You-you love me?" Luke asked, his heart racing this had to be a dream or a joke or something. There was no way Ashton irwin loved him.

"Fuck." Ashton swore.

"Fine, yes, I love you. I've been in love with you." Ashton huffed running his hand through his hair.

"You have a...a boyfriend." Luke shook his head.

"I know but I don't love him. I never did." Ashton responded feeling slightly guilty.

"But you said..." Luke shook his head again. This had to be a dream.

"I lied. It was you, it was always you." Ashton spoke sadly. He couldn't believe he'd slipped up.

"I don't understand." Luke frowned. The guy Ashton had talked about in Hawaii, had he been talking about him?

"In Hawaii, the guy you said you were in love with..." Luke trailed off.

"You." Ashton nodded.

"When we slept together and I apologized cause I was your first and I thought you'd want it to be him it was actually..." Luke trailed off again unable to say it.

"You. It's always been you, since seventh grade it's been you, Luke." Ashton answered.

"No, that can't be right. You-you hated me." Luke shook his head trying to make sense of it all.

"It's the only way I could cope with my feelings." Ashton answered dropping his head.

"When you deleted the text from Liam it wasn't because of Braxton." Luke said starting to piece things together.

Ashton shook his head.

"I couldn't lose you to him." Ashton answered.

"In the car when Braxton asked you who you wanted to be with, it wasn't Jace."

"No." Ashton shook his head again.

"That's why you hated Niall."

Ashton nodded.

"I can't believe this."  Luke pressed his fingers to his temples.

"I'm so sorry, I tried getting over you, but I don't know how." Ashton felt sick to his stomach.

"I didn't mean for you to find out." Ashton's tone gave away his nerves.

"Why?" Luke asked looking at Ashton.

"Because I knew we could never be together." Ashton answered sadly.

Just then Michael and Calum walked in.

"I-I gotta go." Luke said rushing out past Calum and Michael.

"Luke, wait!" Ashton hurried after him but it was too late he was in his car. He threw it in reverse and hurried out of the driveway leaving Ashton broken hearted.

*AN*
Dun Dun Dun Dunnnn. Lol
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