Break me

R

Something snapped after last night.

I had dreams. Lots and lots of dreams. I thought I'd have trouble sleeping, but I fell asleep right away and slept like a baby.

Today I'm exhausted because really, I didn't sleep that well. I had too many dreams.

I dreamed about you last night. You haven't guest stared in my dreams for a long time. I thought that was because I had forgotten about you. I really thought I was forgetting you. I haven't seen any pictures of you recently, and there aren't any of you on the wall.

It's been like this for a couple of years. Whenever I think of you, I could remember your hands and your feet and your hair and your clothes, but I couldn't remember your face, and I couldn't remember your voice.

I'm sorry that I couldn't remember you, but when you were in my dream, everything was different.

In my dream, I heard you talking and I saw you looking at me. You looked at me directly in the eye, and even in my dream, I recognized it. I though, right in my dream, that that was exactly how you looked at me in real life. The way your brown eyes tilted, the way your glasses were on your nose. It couldn't be more right.

I realized that I'm getting used to you being gone because in my dream I realized that I was just dreaming about you. I can't believe my dream remembered you better than I did.

When I woke up, I had my blankets wrapped around my head, and my feet were cold.

Right now I'm sitting in the dentist office. My teeth are great. My little sister is getting her braces checked. Isn't that cute?

I got car sick on the way there too. Lovely. I'm really thirsty too. I'd like some chocolate milk and wild cherry pepsi, but I bet there isn't even any at home. :(

Anyways, the next dream I had was weirder yet. I cut my hair really short, and I hated it. Everyone else seemed not to mind. They didn't even notice anything was different about me. It was so real.

I kept reaching up to touch my hair, and I couldn't seem to realize that it was a dream.

Then I woke up, went to the bathroom, and touched my hair. I think I'm going crazy.

Last dream; I was like in my own personal romance story.

I was with the guy I liked, and he desperately liked me back. Sounds like a dream, yeah? I kept calling him Niall for some reason though. I don't even know where that came from.

It was quite a good story really, better than any movie I've ever seen. It's too bad I don't remember much of it.

We were just at the big conversation when he was going to admit that he loved me, when I realized I was actually dreaming.

The instant I realized it was a dream, I woke up.

He never got to say he loved me. I couldn't fall back to sleep and finish that dream.

All my blankets were in a heap on the floor. My head was smothered in my pillows.

Thanks for the dream, mom. Glad I kinda remembered you.

End.