Yin & Yang

Chapter 26: Fear (Gabe)

"Name?"

I swallowed hard. "Gabriel Asta."

"And who are you here to visit?" The receptionist didn't even bother looking up at me.

"Alexandra Peoples." I'd literally never called Alex by her full name. But I figured it would be better to avoid confusion.

"And what is your relationship with the patient?"

"I'm-" I was unsure of what to say. "I'm her boyfriend."

"Alright." The receptionist looked at me for the first time as she handed me a badge. "Make sure you wear this at all times. First left, second right. She's in room 37."

I wordlessly took the badge and attached it to my breast pocket. Not for the first time, my stomach churned as I walked through the double doors and into the main wing of the hospital. My heart was pounding. Inadvertently, I flashed back to the day I'd hurt her. I quickly blocked out the images. Reminders of my mistake weren't helpful. It was too painful.

I turned left down a hallway that looked identical to the one I'd just left. I hated hospitals. Everything was so sterile and clean-looking. Everything looked the same. It freaked me out. Plus all of the sickness and injury around me was depressing. Knowing that hospitals were a good thing for people didn't make feel any better about them. It just seemed like there was always something bad surrounding a hospital.

I stopped in front of a wooden door with a small plaque labeled with a 37. Taking a long, slow deep breath, I raised my hand and knocked on the door softly. I heard a faint "Come in" from inside, and I eased the door open.

Alex was asleep, but a nurse was sitting in the room taking various readings. As I walked in, the nurse shook Alex awake.

"I'll leave you two alone." He smiled at me as he left the room.

"Hey Alex," I said as I made my way completely into the room. She still seemed a little groggy and out of it as I walked over toward the bed, but as I got closer, her eyes suddenly widened.

"G-Gabe!" she cried out. "Don't get any closer!"

"Whoa, whoa." I held up my hands defensively. "I'm not going to hurt you, see?" I indicated my gloves with a tilt of my head.

"You were wearing gloves last time, too," Alex said shakily. "You'll hurt me again."

I took another step toward her. "Really, it's-" but Alex cut me off.

"Seriously, don't take one more step!" She reached for her Call Nurse button. "If you do I'll tell them to kick you out!"

"Alex..." I shook my head. "I just wanted to talk to you."

"Get out," Alex commanded. "Now." I opened my mouth to protest, but Alex shook her call button at me. Simultaneously, I remembered the spell of fear that Lilith had put on her. It was useless. She would never listen to me. Sorrow rising in me, I turned around and made a quick exit.

I walked back through the hospital, anger growing. How dare Lilith take Alex from me this way! She had absolutely no right. I was tired of Lilith acting like she was my parent, acting like she was superior to me.

But doubt gnawed at the back of my head. I knew that I was dangerous, and that it was justified for Alex to be scared of me. These thoughts swirled and mixed with the anger I felt as I stormed angrily out of the hospital. My thoughts were muddled as I turned the key in the ignition and pulled out of the hospital parking lot. But I didn't drive home. I didn't know where I was driving. I only knew that I was angry, and somebody was going to feel it.