Hey guys! So today I'd like to sit down and just talk. Discuss some things that have been on my mind for a while now.
So let's begin this journey into my mind! (There's one person that I want to read this, but I doubt he will)
Alright, so some of you may have read my book, "The Secret Life Of Skyler." If you have, then you know that book was about Skyler, my OC and August, a boy she falls in love with at the end of the book. Well, at the time I had a boyfriend. And that character was based off of him. (Not going to say my boyfriends name for his private life) well, me and him did break up a few months ago- maybe 2 months ago? I can't remember.
I broke up with him because I felt like he was ignoring me. But for the past few days I have been feeling like that was not the entire case. I, myself was very needy. (I hate thinking about this after realizing it because it's so cringe like I'm sorry if he is reading this, I'm so sorry) Anyway, I was clingy and needy and went way to fast. I'm afraid I chased him off, so that was my fault.
For the past few weeks, I have been able to think of nothing but him. I miss him quite a lot, and I wish I had the guts to talk to him about it. I know he follows this book, but wether he still pays attention to it I have no idea.
I thought I was over him for a while, but my heart is telling me other wise. It's gotten me in a bad mood lately and making me anxious and upset. I really do miss him, he's a great guy and he's so fucking adorable I can't stand it.
I may try and talk to him, but then again I don't know. I don't think he wants anything to do with me anymore. But it's so hard cause these feelings for him have resurfaced, and stronger then ever. They are stronger now then they were then and that surprised me, but also scares me.
I love him, I do. I want to fix it, I just really don't know how. I wish he would talk to me a little, maybe ease the nervousness. That would be nice.
I'll talk to him every once and a while, and I know my face is flaming when I do. He's so adorable, and his personality is so sweet. Just him entirely amazes me, and is mesmerizing. I've gotten to were I don't even go to homeroom because I'm so awkward and want to avoid it.
I really miss him, and I want him back. Maybe friendship would be ok? As long as I can be around him.
And again, if he is reading this, ether I'm fucked or something good may come from this. But I just want to say that I am sorry. And I hope we can start again.
So, for those who read this, give me advice down in the comments. It would be much appreciated. Thank y'all, this has just been troubling me and I needed to get it out. Hopefully I can resolve this issue. Later guys gals and non binary pals. PEACE OUT! ✌️
