"People always ask me, "Why are you so quiet?" I don't know. I'll never know. I've always been so quiet, and whenever I speak, I'm known to have a hushed voice. If I think that it's okay to talk, then I won't ever stop, but if I simply don't feel li...
this is the meme of the journal entry that when i saw it on instagram i literally died because i feel like this would be me considering i can't take a hint😂:
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"you stupid bitch" SNSNJWWHABAB
question:
have you ever met someone, observed someone, or gotten to know someone, famous or not famous, and thought how perfect you'd be for each other?
like lemme tell you
when you realize that about someone, especially someone you can't have for some reason, that is really rough.
and if you've read all of this fucking journal, i KNOW what you're thinking:
"oh lex is just talking about harry styles like always blahbalahwhaj"
BUT IM NOT.
i rank harry's level like too high, like he's too out of my league (not saying i ever had a chance i mean let's be mature here). i never consider him like that. he is too perfect to even use as an example here. it'd be a DREAM, hence why i write fanfics about him, but he's not who i'm talking about here.
i'm talking more so about just that feeling here, but i do have examples of why this has become so apparent to me in the last month.
i really dislike the feeling, i almost wish it could go away because it's like, i'm just sitting here, alone, thinking all these things and it's so stupid of me tbh. you might be wondering if you've kept up with this journal how i could say this if i did say once that i didn't have a "type". i still don't have a type, and here's my example of why i can still say that:
youtube. it's a mix of all types of people with all types of personalities, but they seem (at least the ones i watch) like normal people like us. i have like 5+ crushes on youtube alone because of how down to earth these people are.
and these people are all different, hence why i have no direct type.
the platform itself, it's been a huge help and part of my life for a year now. i'm addicted to youtube.
that's where i've come to know people, whenever/however they put themselves out there. and i really love the people i have been watching.
Pewdiepie is an example for me. i started watching him a month ago just to see the hype. some aspects of his personality aren't my thing, like the anime stuff and he's a little extra. i went in with an open mind and wasn't too sure at first, like i didn't like him very much, but as i got to know his personality, i started to like him, and then i started to have a slight attraction to him.
