*A Nobody* *n.h.* -Finished-

Gone

-Natalie

After talking with Paul I went upstairs and got changed into some shorts and a t-shirt. I couldn’t really find any of the boys, once I was done changing, to hang out with so I decided that I’d take a walk down the beach; but I wouldn’t step foot in the water.

I told Paul where I was going before I slipped on the pair of TOMS Lou had bought me earlier in the tour then heading out the door.  I had no real destination in mind so I just started walking down the beach.

Thankfully the medication he gave me seemed to help my throat stop hurting.

As I walked I noticed people staring at me. It probably had to do with the fact that I was actually wearing clothes instead of a swim suit. Or it could have been the marks on my arms that caught their attention. Either way I let them stare, I didn’t care enough about their opinions.

“Hey are you Natalie Hanes?” I heard a voice say from behind me.

I was afraid to answer that in case it was one of the guys’ fans but I turned around anyway.

Since I couldn’t talk much I nodded my head shyly. When I did so, the girl in front of me started smiling really wide, scaring me. It wouldn’t have been weird but she was probably around my age and looked almost identical to me. Same size, hair, and shape; the only difference would have to be her brown eyes.

“Can I hug you? You are one of my inspirations in life!” I was shocked that this girl had me as someone she looks up too. I wasn’t the girl to be looking up to, that would have to be a model or a singer, not plain old me.

Again, I nodded my head. She gave a tiny squeal and came towards me. Her arms wrapped around my back as I did that same.

“You know, I think that you’re an amazing girl. I know it’s not my place to say this but I can see how strong you are. You have to be going through a lot and somehow you pushed through it.” I pulled away from her and gave her a confused look.

“What are you talking about?” I said softly, my voice sounding very scratchy. She softly pulled my arms out in front of us.

“I know the feeling of having that metal going into skin and having to hide the results with bracelets. There’s something that had to make you do it. I know people don’t like talking about why so I just wanted to say that you’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit.” I looked away from her and out into the ocean before I walked over to a nearby bench. I didn’t want to talk about this especially to someone I didn’t know but there was something about this girl that made me feel like I could trust her.

As I sat down she sat beside me.

“There was, and still is, but it’s really hard to talk about.”  I could feel her let out a sigh.

“Yeah, you don’t know who to trust or who will judge you for it. Usually the ones who don’t judge are the ones who have experienced it.” I nodded my head, completely understanding what she was saying.

Most people, who judge, are narrow minded and don’t get why we would want to inflict pain on one’s self and others, who are really supportive and don’t judge, have either witnessed it, done it, or are actually understanding.

“Would you judge me if I told you my story? I feel like I need to tell someone about it, maybe that will help me out some.” At first I was going to say that she didn’t have to tell me her story but then I thought about it, sometimes having people there for you, sometimes only just hearing the problem, can help you out.

“Yeah you can tell me, I won’t judge you.”

She smiled sadly before starting into her battles.

“When I was fourteen I didn’t like myself. My whole perspective on myself was that I was worthless nobody and that no one would ever want to come close to me. I wasn’t the prettiest girl in school or the thinnest and that really got to me. Everyone would make fun of me for it too. Somewhere between the names and the insults I started believing them too. I would come home from school and just need to feel that release. The first time I cut I was so scared because I had promised myself that I wouldn’t ever do it and once it was over I realized that I broke that promise.”

She stopped and took a deep breath, not out of lack of oxygen but because she was on the verge of crying. Even though I didn’t know this girl I pulled her into my chest and hugged her tightly; her story sounding so much like mine.

“I told myself that I wouldn’t do it again but I broke that as well. I cut for about three years, I only stopped because of you.” She said as she hiccupped. I pulled back slightly shocked.

“Me? How did I make you stop?” She sat up straighter and wiped her eyes, although the tears still fell silently.

“You helped me because I saw all this hate that was being sent to the boys about you and how when you were out it never fazed you. You’re a normal girl who hangs out with One Direction. Out of all these skinny bitches that are models or singers but they chose you.  In my eyes that’s amazing because it means that they really don’t think like other guys do.” She stopped and smiled before quickly adding, “No offense, though. That sounded really horrible and didn’t come out as I thought it would!” She covered her face as I laughed.

“It’s okay, I get where you’re coming from. I take no offense to it at all.” She gave me a skeptical look until I told her that I knew what she was saying and that she didn’t have to think that I took it the wrong way.

“You know I never did catch your name.” I said after we sat for a moment in silence.

“Oh, I’m Amber.” She told me with a smile.

“Well Amber, it was good to talk to you and I just want you to know that no matter what I’ll go through I’ll think of you and know that I can overcome it but I want to let you know that whatever is going on in your life, you can make it to the end of the tunnel. You are so much better than what they are saying about you and you’re most definitely not worthless. Everyone has a purpose in life some just find theirs later.”

I told her sincerely, as I gave her another hug. I didn’t want her to think that just because people tell her that she is worthless than that’s what she is. She has an amazing future ahead of her.

“Thank you so much. Not just for the advice but for listening and not judging, it means a lot to me.”

Standing up I wiped off my butt, getting the sand and dirt off of it so I wouldn’t embarrass myself, then telling Amber that I’d see her around.

Even though we both knew that this was a one-time thing, that we weren’t ever going to meet again, she told me that she’d see me later before heading back down to the shore. I waved at her before making my way back the way I had come; thinking that now would be a good time to head back to the beach house.

When I turned around to give her one last look, she wasn’t standing by the water’s edge like she had been not mere seconds before.

I really am not very sure how the ending sounds. I think it's good but it's also 2:30 in the morning so it might be total shit. Anyway, I have to thank  @taytortot1998 because her comment made me want to write another chapter. I have been horrible when it comes to updating this but I finally figured out how this will end and I will be uploading again really soon! If it counts the epilogue is almost over..... Yeah I still have chapters to write and I'm writing the epilogue, crazy I knoww. But I do hope you all like this! :) Lots of love! xx

Stay Beautiful! <3