Gone

Chapter 13: Marchin On

Harry's pov

I sat in my hotel room waiting for Niall to call. He promised he would when he was done with Charlie. I had to practically beg him to go out to California to go see Charlie.

I was still in New York though. I was the last person she'd want to see. I just needed to know that she was okay. She has to be alive and well.

I was beginning to get impatient. I got up and poured myself a glass of Scotch. I sipped it and the burning liquid ran through my throat.

I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and began to dial Niall's number. Almost simultaneously it began to ring.

"How is she?" I asked urgently.

"I think you should come to California," he said in distraught.

"What's wrong Niall?" I asked beginning to panic.

"Charlie's pregnant and she wants to kill the baby," he said and a sort of buzzing began in my ear. My whole body went into shock. My phone dropped out my hand and I threw my glass against the wall in front of me.

I watched as it broke into a thousand pieces on the floor. "Harry?" Niall's voice rang through the phone but I didn't care.

I collected myself and picked up my phone off the floor. "I'm taking the first flight."

Charlie's pov

Thursday came to quickly. I hadn't told Harry yet and I hadn't planned to. I was on my way to the clinic ready for my appointment. I walked inside and signed in at the front desk.

I sat down on a chair nervous. I looked around at all the crying girls. I imagined how hard their lives would have to be to give up their unborn child.

"I have loved and lost and loved again and still my strength does not forsake me," a woman who was sitting next to me spoke. I turned around and smiled. "I've read your book over a thousand times."

"Thank you."

"You always seemed like such a strong person, well at least your characters are. You can't possibly be giving up something else. Haven't you lost enough?" She said.

I almost had the wind knocked out of me. I heard her words and everything was in pain again. Tears came almost immediately. "Um excuse me," I said. I got up and walked to the front door. I stopped to look back at the woman but she was gone.

I continued walking out the door and straight to my car. I got in and tears just started pouring down my face. I couldn't control them. I started the car and began to drive.

When I got to my destination I knocked on the door of Niall's hotel room. He opened it and saw me crying. I walked straight inside without an invitation. "I couldn't do it Niall. I was there in the office and I just couldn't do it," I cried. He stood in the middle of his living room and walked over and hugged him.

"It's ok Charlie," he whispered into my hair.

"No it's not. What am I supposed to do now?"

"Well maybe telling me would be a good start," I heard Harry's voice and turned around. He was standing there in the hall way. I fought every urge in me to run after him and hug him and kiss him.

"Well um Harry I'm pregnant, about eight weeks now and it's yours. Yup I'm pretty sure it's yours because I haven't had sex with any other guy in the last six months," I spoke sarcastically.

"Can we please talk Charlie. Outside," he spoke softly. He was so obviously hurt.

"Ok," I gave in. We both walked out onto the balcony. I sat down on a chair and Harry leaned against the railing.

"Charlie I'm sorry for everything I did to you but nothing gives you the right to kill my child without telling me anything," he was speaking hard and firm. "I love you. I always will love you, you can't do this to me."

"Do what to you Harry? Leave you alone? Guess what I've been alone all my life and you had absolutely no problem leaving me alone. I had no other choice."

"You left me remember! You walked away and didn't even want to try! Your so scared of everything in your life. You think that once something goes wrong you've lost everything but no I won't let you take that child away from me. It is my baby and I deserve a chance in its life."

"My friend died the night you cheated on me Harry. You know that though. I am scared. I'm scared that everything I've ever gotten the chance to love gets ripped away from me. You made that so obvious. You tried so hard to get me to love you and I allowed myself to. I put away everything I was afraid of to love you and you ripped it all away from me. The night I needed you most you left me alone. I'd hate myself if I let myself fall in love with this baby and it gets ripped away from me too."

"You can't think like that Charlie," he got on his knees in front of me, "I hate myself for everything I did to you. I hurt you and I'm so sorry. There's not a day that goes by where I don't think about you and feel maybe only a piece of the loneliness you've been feeling. But I'm not asking you to let me in again. I'm asking you to let this child, our child love you. Let them never leave you. Teach this baby that not everybody has to be alone."

We were both crying at this point. My hands were in his and he held them tight. They were so cold. "Your hands, there so cold," I said blankly.

"They've been cold ever since I lost you... listen Charlie if it makes you feel better we don't even have to be together. I just don't want this baby to be effected by my mistakes."

"Why do you even want a child Harry? You're nineteen, you're a rock star, you stay out all night and drink, neither one of us are really parent material."

"It's not like we're not able to take care of it. I guess it's more of whom I'm having a baby with then the baby." He smiled. I missed his smile. I looked into his eyes for the first time.

"Promise me Harry. Promise that if I let myself love our child that I won't come up short. That I can absolutely love it no matter what. Promise me that I won't loose this love." I was going to trust him one last time.

"I promise that you can love this baby with all your heart," he said it so sweetly. I had to believe him.

"Don't hurt me again Harry Styles," I whispered to myself. I don't care if he heard it or not.

A/N

How are you liking it so far?? Is it good? Should I continue to post the rest of it?