Married to be Fooled

Pang-Tatlumpu

"Bakit kailangan mo 'kong pahirapan,Chaze?ano ba talagang gusto mong mangyari?ano'ng gusto mong gawin ko?sabihin mo sakin para malaman ko,Chaze.Sabihin mo sakin"-wika ko saka inalis ang pagkaka-yakap nya sakin saka humarap sakanya,halatang naguguluhan  sya sa sinabi ko pero mas naguguluhan ako

Hindi ko maintindihan kung ano'ng gusto nyang mangyari samin.Kung ano ba talaga ang meron kami.Kung meron ba talagang kami o ako lang yung nag iisip na meron ng kami

"What are you talking about,Kasper?"-tanong nya habang naka salubong ang kilay,nagbuntong hininga muna ako saka ako tumingin sakanya

"Sabihin mo sakin kung anong gusto mong mangyari,ipaliwanag mo sakin.Sabihin mo kung nakikipaglaro ka lang para hindi ako umasa,para hindi ko hayaan yung sarili ko na mas mahulog pa sa'yo,pinapakita mo sakin na may pakialam ka sakin pero pinapakita mo ding wala.Hindi ko alam kung alin ang mas papaniwalaan ko.Pinapakitaan mo ko ng mga bagay na mas makakapag-pahulog sakin pero hindi ako sigurado kung kapag nahulog ba ko ay sasaluhin mo talaga ako.Please lang Chaze,wag mo 'kong paasahin sa wala"-mahabang saad ko,hindi ko na kayang sarilinin pa 'to.Gusto kong masagot yung mga tanong ko,gusto kong malaman kung may aasahan ako sakanya o wala.

"Well,listen carefully bitch.Wala ka naman talagang aasahan kay Chazekio dahil wala naman talaga syang gusto sayo--"-napa-lingon ako sa nagsalita,nakita ko si blonde girl na naka-sandal sa pader.Hindi ko alam na nandito din pala sya sa loob

"Shut the fuck up,Sera!Cut that crap--"-sigaw ni Chaze pero pinutlo din ni blonde girl ang sasabihin nya

"You shut up,Chaze!--"-sigaw din ni Sera saka bumaling sakin
"-Wala syang interes sa'yo,you're too plain boring to catch his attention.Alam mo ba kung bakit sya pumayag na magpakasal sa'yo?Well,I know na hindi kaya sasabihin ko sa'yo.Chaze,Kazz and me made a bet,sa kuya ni Chaze ka dapat ipapakasal pero dahil nga sa bet namin ay inako nya.He told us that he will make you crazy for him then ditch you and then makukuha nya na ang pusta namin.Wala kang kahit anong halaga kay Chaze dahil pinagpustahan ka lang naman namin so stop assuming bitch and stop with all your dramas,nakakatawa ka lang tingnan.Umaasa ka sa mga bagay na imposibleng mangyari,Chaze even told me that when he's done playing with you,he'll let Soul have you,what a good friend,right?"-naka-ngising kwento nya,yun pala talaga ang totoong dahilan kung bakit sya pumayag na magpakasal

"Sherina"-Chaze called her in a very dangerous tone while looking straight into her eyes

"Enough with your bullshits,Chaze.Nagsawa ka sakin?then I'm ruing this girls life"-Sera said nonchalantly while smirking,I remained silent as my system tries to digest all the things she have said

I want to slap her face until it breaks but also want to thank her,atleast my questions are now answered.

Now I know that wala talaga akong aasahan kay Chaze at kung saan ako dapat lumugar.

Hindi na 'ko mahihirapang mag isip pa.Now I know that I'm not that worthy for him

Tahimik lang si Chaze at hindi kumilos nung hinawi ko sya paalis ng pinto kaya malaya akong naka-labas,dumiretcho ako sa parking lot at sumakay kaagad sa sasakyan ko.

My tears started falling as I rest my head and the things Sera have said keeps repeating in my head.It feels like hell,I tried to stop my feelings for him but my mind can't win over my heart.

My love for Chaze is making me dumb to the point that eventhough Sera slapped in my face the bare truth,my heart keeps rejecting it.It feels like my whole is breaking but my heart still wants some explanation from Chaze.I don't want this feeling,I hate this feeling because it makes me insane

Dahan dahan kong nilabas yung wallet ko,I promised sister Ignacia that I'm not doing that again but I just can't help it.I badly need to do it

I started putting lacerations on my arm and let that crimsom red fluid to flow