Fix A Heart

A Thousand Years

Heartbeats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow
One step closer
I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more 

"Ohh, there ya go. I should probably go down and we can start getting breakfast but I think I'll enjoy some snuggles first. How about you? That sound like a plan. Today is a huge day for us. We have our hearing this afternoon and you'll officially be a Chmerkovskiy. Not that daddy and I didn't see you as anything less but it's nice to hear that the whole world agrees. Huh sugar? Do you even realize what a big day today is?" Sharna said as she talked to Bella one morning while she rocked her. She had gotten up early with the little one and fed her while they relaxed in the rocker. Typically she would then go down and start breakfast or at least coffee for her and Val. Today however it felt more appropriate to just slowly take in the day.

"We got you a new pretty dress and then after we get back, everyone is coming to visit you. We're going to have cake. Maybe we'll let you try a teeny tiny bite. I feel like that's allowed today. You can have green beans and cake for dinner sound good?" Sharna said smiling as Bella reached up and put her fingers in her mom's mouth. Sharna pretended to chomp on them making Bella giggle in response. Considering how things could have went, Bella was an amazingly calm back. She was most content when she was curled up with one of her parents but enjoyed her extended family as well. She rarely cried except for when she was scared or not feeling well. Her anxiety had calmed immensely as they had got home and sorted out a routine for the three of them. Once she realized things were normal and this was her new life she was good.

"You know, there was a time when I thought I would never get this opportunity." Sharna whispered softly after Bella was done playing and went back to just cuddling into her mother. She pulled Bella in tighter as she felt tears fill her eyes.

"You have a big sister but you won't ever get to meet her until you go to heaven which is a long long time away. She was in my belly but God decided that he wanted her as an angel instead of a baby just like he needed your momma and daddy. When he took Rose away, I thought for sure that he was punishing me. For thousands of things. For not being a better kid, for not getting out of the situation I was in, just for anything. I thought he didn't think I could be a good mommy because of my past so he took that chance away from me. Then daddy and I got the call that you needed someone to love you. And I thought, well that's not fair to this little girl, what did she ever do? She didn't have anything that caused her to need to be punished. And then after being with you and falling in love with you, i realized something that daddy had been trying to tell me all along. I wasn't being punished and neither were you. We all just get dealt a hand of cards and sometimes our cards aren't as fun as others but that doesn't mean we should give up. Sometimes it means we need to be patient, sometimes it means we need to be creative, sometimes it means we can't always have what we want, and sometimes we just need to remember that it's not all about us and there are people in our lives that are there to support us. And you know what, daddy and I will always always be there for you. No matter what." Sharna said bringing her up to pretty a kiss to her cheek.

"And daddy will always be there for mommy." Val's voice came from the doorway startling Sharna and Bella both.

"Babe. How much did you hear?" Sharna said sheepishly once she got her wits about her.

"A lot. I realized you weren't in bed and weren't in the kitchen. So I made coffee and came to find my girls." Val said as he crossed the room and put the coffee he was carrying on the nightstand. He knelt down next to the two and found Sharna's hand.