Illusion {l.t}

{xxxiii}

BEFORE I START, DID YOU GUYS HEAR ED'S NEW SONG FOR TFIOS? OMG AMAZING I CANT STOP LISTENING TO IT AAAAHH OMG. SORRY FOR WASTING YOUR TIME READING THIS BUT IT WAS IMPORTANT.

Don't forget to vote and comment on the chapter, i love yous. Enjoy xx

*Christina's POV*

I look at Louis, wishing he'll be okay, wishing the voices in his head would just go away. A tear rolls down from my eyes and i sniff, walking out of the room, then out of the house for a fresh air.

The sun had gone, the sunset was out, darkness surrounded the moon. Stars scattered all over the sky.

I made my way over to the garden in front of Stan's house, lying on my back on the grass, i looked up to the sky full of stars.

Sighing, i counted stars. The dark sky was so beautiful, the full moon in the middle, millions of stars scattered all around the sky, i just watched each star glow bright.

A tear skipped my eye, as i felt a body lie next to me. I looked next to me, Stan was looking up at the sky. I looked back up and heard him sigh.

After minutes of silence, neither of us saying anything. Stan talked.

"Im sorry" i heard Stan say.

I frowned but then i remember why he's apologizing.

I don't think i'm ready to forgive him, though, i know i forgave louis but

"It's okay if you won't forgive, it's just that i want to let you know that i'm truly sorry for what i did." He got up and walked back inside.

I let out a shaking sigh and closed my eyes.

Taking a deep breath, i opened my eyes again. A lot of things were running in my mind, i just couldn't cope with it all. The weather was getting colder by the minute, and i had worn a shirt.

I couldn't bother going inside, i got out to get a fresh air and clear my mind, and i wasn't going back in without clearing my mind, without making any right decisions.

I feel bad for him, all the times we had spent together, slept together, laughed, sang, joked, cried... i couldn't just throw it away, all the love we shared. I can't ignore the deep love i feel towards that one specific guy, that's sitting inside the house i'm lying in front of, his head in his hands, sobbing. I couldn't just let him there alone, so so broken.

I rubbed my eyes, wiping my tears. I stood up, faking a smile, i walked inside. I put all the things he did to hurt me behind, forgetting about them, its all in the past, i need to focus on the present and future, and i cant imagine myself without him, i cant imagine life without Louis.

I just hope he would want to be with me.

Walking into the room, i ran into something, or may i say, someone, Louis...

"Sorry" we both apologised quickly

"It's okay" we said in unison.

I smiled looking up at his eyes, they looked so sad, so.. lifeless, and hurt..

My heart broke right then and there.

I can't get him back to the way he was.. i broke him..

He forced a smile, i returned a hurt smile. Looking away, tears formed in my eyes. I cant believe i did this to him. Im such a monster.

I bit my lip, trying hard not to let a tear escape my eye.

"Im really sorry" all the times i ignored him, i let him stay in front of my house in the cold didn't even get out of my house, all the time i rejected him, made him the way he is now, and its all my fault. I'm such a horrible person, I'm such a, such a monster.

His hand cupped my face making me turn my head and look at him. He crashed his lips over mine, so sweet and elegant, so soft and passionate, so full of hurt and love, so extraordinary and perfect.

I had missed his soft lips, his touch, his lips on mine.

His kiss made me feel him, made me feel how hurt he is, how much he loves me. It made me feel how desperately i want and need him back. It made me realise how much i miss us.

He pulled away from the hug, but i pulled him back in, directing him that i want him, i need him, and i made a mistake too, a mistake of not letting him back in after what he did, i made a mistake, i was so selfish that all i was thinking was about myself and not how he had felt about that as well.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss, pulling him closer to me. Wanting to feel his body against mine so desperately, i couldn't help but press my body against his.

I miss his affection, his body, his touch. I miss the affect he had against my skin.

I need to let him know that i love him, i will always do, and i will never stop.

"I love you to the moon and back" i breathed

"I love you way more than that" he whispered through my lips.

I closed my eyes, not helping the smile on my lips.

He pressed his forehead against mine, "i can't live without you, baby" he whispered. His hands smoothly moving down to my face, stroking my cheek.

I smiled up at his eyes, "are we good?" I asked hesitatingly

"We are, if you want us to be.." He trailed off

I pecked his lip "does that answer your question?" I ask looking down at his lips.

He nodded, life and happiness now filling his eyes, i smiled, truly.

"Im madly in love with you" he speaks.

His words flatter my heart and i cant help but giggle like a fifteen, sixteen year old girl...

"Are you okay?" I ask

He slowly nods and hugs me. His huge arms wrap around my body, his biceps wrapped around me, making me feel secure and protected. I wrap my arms around him, my head rests against his chest, his smell pouring into my nostrils, a smile forms on my lips, i missed him, his smell.

(Hi guys! Sorry for the late update, i just don't feel like writing. My story just sucks and i just don't want to write anymore, none of yous like it anyways and i dont know what to write anymore.

But thank you for reading.)