Stampy and Sqaishey Love Story 5

Chapter 45

Rachel's POV

Therapy was good. Therapy was really good. I definitely took to Lisa, she was nice and she understood me. I'd heard so much about therapists not really listening, or dismissing you but she did everything she could to help, it was nice. I'd been going for a month already, and things were going okay. I was getting better. I had my moments, and I had to ask mum and dad to take the scales away two weeks in because I weighed myself, and realising I'd put weight on really upset me. But I didn't stop eating, or throw up again, I pushed through.

Maybe putting weight on isn't so bad, and maybe not having my ribs show isn't so bad either. And eating wasn't bad. I felt full, that was good. I no longer felt lightheaded either, I no longer felt like I was going to pass out constantly. I felt... Alive. 

"Rae" Ben grinned cheakily, stood in the doorway to my bedrooom. I rolled my eyes as he interrupted my thought train, but stood and smiled anyway "I'm heading to the park, you coming?"

"Yeah sure, give me ten!" I nodded, and with that he closed my door and probably rushed downstairs to get his shoes on. I looked in the mirror at what I was wearing; a band shirt and jeans, and decided that I looked decent. I slipped on a burgundy hoodie that I stole from Max, along with some black converse and rushed down the stairs. 

"Have fun, be safe" Mum hummed, waving to us from the kitchen.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't" Dad joked, handing us a five pound note each, just in case we decided to go to the shop for sweets "And make sure you buy plenty of unhealthy things!"

A supportive father is a real father.

"Thank you" I called, following Ben out the door. The walk there was quiet, apart from the odd comment Ben made about street signs, including one innuendo. Ugh, boys. 

"Are you better now?" Ben hesitantly asked. I don't think he really wanted to ask sucha  straight forward question, but didn't know any other way to talk about the situation. For the last month he'd seemed genuinely concerned, checking up on me through the day at school, sitting with me through lunch and such. Even when I had a little break down at school lunch about not wanting to eat, he sat with me and told me it was okay. I didn't tell mum or dad about that little meltdown, but I did tell Lisa. I just didn't want to worry them, and it happened at the start of the month anyway, I'd not had one since.

"Not quite" I shrugged, trying to think of a way to explain it "I don't think I will be fully there for a long time"

"What do you mean?" 

"I won't just immediately be better. It takes time, I guess. I eat right now, but I don't enjoy it very much. And I'm still struggling with eating out and putting weight on, but I'm progressing"

"Right" He nodded before pulling me into a hug "I'm proud of you, y'know"

My face broke into a smile as I let out a little giggle. Ben would never fail to make me smile.

"if you dare tell anyone I just told you this, I will kill you" he blushed, rolling his eyes when we broke the hug.

"You and your ego" I joked, walking on with him.

"It's not an ego, it's... uh..." 

"Exactly"

Before we knew it, we'd arrived at the park where a group of our friends were, some sitting and chatting, some playing football. I spotted Max and smiled to myself, wandering over. His hair was flopped over, some parts messy and stuck up but it suited him, and he was wearing a black hoodie, black jeans and black converse that matched my own. He was stood with Mark, another one of our friends and they were laughing. It was nice to see Max so happy.

"Hey Rae" Max waved, offering a shy smile when Mark smirked at him. I returned the smile and wandered over, greeting him with a quick hug before smiling at Mark.

"Max here was just saying you should be here soon" Mark laughed, making both me and my boyfriend blush "I'll leave you to it"

"To the swings?"

"To the swings" I confirmed, taking hold of his hand and pulling him along with me, laughing when he groaned because he had to run. 

We sat side by side, not really swinging much, it was more of a gentle rock, chatting about whatever came to mind.

"How've you been?" He finally asked, and so I offered him the same reply I gave Ben, to which he nodded.

"I'm really happy with where I am in life, I guess" 

"Good" Max beamed, taking my hand in his own and inspecting our laced fingers "I'm really proud of how far you've come"

"Thank you" I hummed, cheeks reddening. I squeezed his hand in mine, pulling it up and kissing his knuckles. 

Perhaps things were starting to look up and everything was going to be okay, even though I never thought it'd happen. I had my family, Max, friends. I had more than I ever thought I had, I was just too blinded by sadness.

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A/N - I have an account for my own books! @amymaria03 :) Please check it out! I'll be publishing some stuff soon, hopefully.