Unexpected Love

Prologue

"They say that love will always conquer all. That love is the solution to every problem."

Napairap nalang ako habang nakikinig sa teacher naming nagdidiscuss sa harapan namin. Ako nalang ata ang hindi interesado sa mga pinagsasabi ni ma'am tsk.

"Miss Perez, do you agree with my statement?"

Napatingin ako kay ma'am saka dahan dahang tumango. Alam ko naman pag sasabihin kong hindi ako um-agree ay tatanungin niya ako kung bakit. Tinatamad akong sumagot sa recitation ni ma'am.

Nagpatuloy si ma'am sa pagdidiscuss at tinignan niya kami isa isa.

"Naramdaman niyo na bang mainlove?"

Iba iba ang mga naging reaksiyon naming lahat. May hindi alam kung ano ang sasabihin, may mga taong proud na proud pang tumango, at may mga tao ding umiling. Katulad ko, I don't know what it feels like to be in love. Many people are risking just to feel that. Hindi ko sila ma-gets, required bang magkaroon ng girlfriend o boyfriend? Iyang mga jowa ba nila, sure ba silang love ang nararamdaman nila diyan? What if it is just infatuation? Lust?

"Why do you think people cheat? Eh diba sa simula pa lang ng relasyon ay mahal nila ang isa't isa. Sa tingin niyo, bakit? Kasi nawala ang pagmamahal? Class, I have this kind of belief to myself. Love won't fade. Kapag may nagloko or may maghiwalay, isa lang ang dahilan niyan. It is because, from the beginning of a relationship, love was not present at that time. It can be a mere lust or maybe you were just focusing on your ideal types that's why you liked that person. We all have our different beliefs, you don't have to follow mine. We all have the freedom to choose. I am just sharing my belief, malay niyo I can be a great help in the future." She said and her eyes laid on me by her last sentence.

Bakit ganyan makatingin si ma'am sa akin? As if magagamit ko yang mga sinasabi niya. I don't have someone and I won't have one. The opposite will always rise. If there is love, there will always be a negative side to it. Pain. Bakit magmamahal pa kung masasaktan rin naman?

Love fades. I've seen and heard stories with that kind of context. Mapapagod ang pusong magmahal. Hindi ito consistent, those feelings are just temporary. At first they will give you butterflies, and at a snap, everything will vanish and they will leave you with scars that are hard to heal.

***

"You will eventually feel that kind of feeling, Maureen."

Napatayo ako bigla sa upuan ko ng dahil sa biglaang pagsulpot ni ma'am sa tabi ko. She was smiling weirdly at me. I cleared the lump on my throat before answering her.

"P-po?"

"Kanina pa kita napapansin. You have this kind of reaction that disgusts with my topic. Well, naiintindihan naman kita. You reminded me of myself when I was your age. Mahahanap mo rin ang para sa'yo. Maganda rin yan, na focus ka muna sa studies mo bago sa ibang tao. Oh siya, mauuna na akong umalis ha." Sabi niya saka tinapik ang balikat ko.

Nag-dismiss na pala si ma'am, hindi ko man lang napansin. Napaisip ako sa mga sinabi ni ma'am sa akin. Mahahanap ko rin ang para sa akin? Inalog alog ko ang utak ko para mawala yun sa utak ko.

Nakatingin lang ako kay ma'am habang nakikipag-kwentuhan siya sa mga tao nasa labas. Manghuhula ka ba ma'am?

Love itself fears me the most, mas mabuting hindi ko nalang maramdaman ito. Nakita ko kung pano niwasak ng pag-ibig ang mga taong nasa paligid ko. May it be close to me or the strangers around me. They may have different reasons but at the end, they all have the same pain that they felt but with different intensities.

Kinuha ko na lang ang notebook ko mula sa upuan ko at lumabas na ako sa classroom namin. Makapag review na nga!

I sat underneath the tree as I scanned my notes.

As I was scanning my notes, a girl suddenly sat beside me. Tinignan ko ito at di man lang siya nakatingin sa akin. She was just smiling while watching the couple that is probably 5 meters away from us.

The more I stare at her, the more her smile becomes sadder. Oh ghad, eto na naman tayo.

"Why am I not hurting?" Mahinang tanong nito

Hindi ko alam kung ako ba ang kinakausap nito o ang sarili niya. Hinayaan ko na lang ito at pinagpatuloy ang pag-babasa ko. I'm just a stranger, wala akong karapatang maki-chismis dito, unless siya ang magkukusa.

"He cheated on me and he impregnated that girl. But it didn't hurt. I am happy for him, am I weird?"

Naramdaman ko ang tingin nito sa akin. I awkwardly looked at her. She was smiling sadly at me while waiting for my response.

"I think, oo. But it doesn't mean na ganun ka talaga. I don't either know you nor your story." I honestly told her

"Maaring madali mong natanggap o kaya di ka masyadong nasasaktan kasi naging masaya ka naman sa relasyon ninyo ng ex mo. Malay mo, di talaga siya ang para sa'yo."

She was about to say something but the bell cut her off. Nagmamadaling tumayo ako at pinagpagan ko na ang palda ko, jusko mali-late ako! Medyo malayo pa naman 'to sa classroom!

Tinignan ko ito ngunit nakangiting tumango lang ito sa akin na parang alam niya na ang susunod kong gagawin.

"Sige na, thank you for your words. It really comforted me."

Nginitian ko ito at tumakbo na ako papunta ng classroom.

Love is really scary. Lahat ay maaring biktima nito. It may be fun and nostalgic, but it has a price to pay for, which is pain.

_____________________
To be continued...

Edited