The Dream Is Not Over

Not Going To Change

We fall asleep early, and wake up early, which is highly unusual for me. I hear Lindsey in the shower as my eyes open, sunlight filtered through the curtains. I smile, sitting up to stretch. I slowly swing my legs off the side of the bed and get up, pulling on a robe. I walk into the bathroom and wipe the mirror with a hand towel, examining my bruises. I sigh, hoping they go away soon.

"Good morning" Lindsey says from inside the shower.

"Good morning, Linds."

He pokes his head out the glass shower door. "How are we feeling?"

"Hungry." I reply and he chuckles.

"Well, we'll have to do something about that soon." I nod vigorously and he tries to hurry up in the shower. "Steph, can you hand me a towel?"

"They're right out here." I smirk at my reflection as he groans.

"Then shield your eyes." He steps out of the shower and crosses behind me. I watch him through the mirror as he grabs a plush towel and wraps it around his waist. "What- no squealing or horrified expression?"

"No." I turn around to face him and he backs up a little, creating a larger space between us. "You're right, I've seen it before."

He chuckles, water falling from his curls and onto the tops of his shoulders. I reach out and wipe a few of the droplets away, my hand sliding down his bare chest. I take a step closer and he backs up again, hitting the wall. He's so cute, familiar...and sexy! His bright, boyish smile and his smoky blue eyes are hard to resist but I have to, quickly taking my hand off his body and taking a step back. I look away, my skin flushed pink. I'm warm and his eyebrows knit together with concern. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. It's just a hot flash."

"Pregnancy, huh?" he jokes, a wicked smile tugging at the corners of his lips and I nod.

"Yeah." I hurry out of the room, fanning myself. I sit on the edge of the bed and lean back on my hands. I close my eyes, trying to think of anything but Lindsey. He follows after me, and I hear him pulling open the drawer of his last remaining items to find something to wear.

"Hey, I think I should try to pack up the apartment today since I've only got a week to hightail it out of there. You wanna come?"

"Sure."

"I don't want you lifting anything, I just want the company."

"Alright."

"Are you trying to meditate? Am I like...fuckin' up your vibe or something?"

I giggle at his phrasing. "No, I..." I open my eyes to look at him, and I consciously have to tell myself to remain calm. Lindsey is standing before me, completely nude as he towel dries his hair. His mouth is moving but I'm not listening. My eyes are scanning his body and my senses are overloaded. I would give anything to wrap my legs around his waist and...

"Steph? Stephanie?"

"Hmm?" I ask, coming out of my trance.

"Where the hell were you?" He half-laughs, pulling on a pair of sweat pants. "I was talking to you and you were somewhere else, just staring into space."

"Oh, sorry."

"Honey, if you're still tired, you should rest. I can bring you something to eat when I come home."

"No, no, I'm fine."

He pulls a tee shirt over his head. "And maybe it's better you don't go. I mean, I'm thinking about renting a car until I can go buy another. I don't want you to have to wait for me to finish the paperwork for this damn car and then get to my apartment where you will just be sitting there watching me pack up my shit. Now that I'm thinking about it, I think you should stay here."

"No, I want to go with you." He gives me a look. "I mean it. I want to see your place."

"Hopefully it won't be mine for much longer." He walks toward the bed and bends down to look at me. His eyes meet mine and I smile. "Did I ever tell you just how beautiful you are to me?"

"Today? No, not today."

"Well, I should have. You're gorgeous, Stevie and it's true what they say, you're glowing."

"Thank you, Lindsey." I lower my eyes and he kisses my forehead.

"I'll leave you to get ready."

"Alright." I watch him walk away and I blame these stupid hormones for making me want him back. "Or you could stay and keep me company."

He turns around and there's that smile again. "It's only right since I'm dragging you across town to do the very same thing for me." I nod, standing up. He watches me, his eyes following me as I search the closet for something to wear. I pull out a blue dress and hold it up to myself, frowning. "That's pretty. What's wrong?"

"I just know it's not going to fit."

"Don't say that! You're tiny."

"But I'm starting to show and it was form fitting to begin with."

"Then let's look for something else."

"Something black, since it's supposed to be slimming."

"No black, Steph. What about red, or a different blue dress...or white!" His enthusiasm makes me fall even more in love with him as he flicks through my clothes on the rack.

"Sure, if anyone ever wondered what a pig would look like wearing the American flag..."

Lindsey suddenly stops, looking back at me. "Stevie!" he scolds and my eyes grow wide. "You are stunning, your body is incredible. Don't you dare say, or even think such terrible things about yourself." His tone is serious and I gasp, tears falling down my cheeks. "Oh my god, I'm sorry." he says quickly. He wraps his arms around me and he holds me as I whimper pitifully into his chest. "I didn't mean to yell at you. I forgot how sensitive you might be right now."

"No, it's not that." I tell him, though muffled. He strokes my hair comfortingly. "I...you're so..." I pull away, trying to gather my thoughts. I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "It was just a really nice thing to say and I guess I wasn't prepared for it. I can't believe after all these years you still—"

"I will always be attracted to you. You are the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on, you're the love of my life and you're the woman I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with. That's not going to change."

I stare at him a moment and his eyes change from a stormy grey to a crystalline blue. I raise up onto my tip toes and press my lips to his. My hand takes its natural position, cradling his jaw and he pulls my body into his own. My eyes open as our lips separate and he wears a dopey smile. "I love you, Lindsey."

"I love you too, Steph. Forever."