The Dream Is Not Over

Plans-Shmans

River and Olivia are finally homeowners with our help and she has been back and forth with her dad bringing things down to the house. River worries as she nears her due date, saying they could just hire movers and a U-Haul but she loves to travel with Al in the van. He didn't have to think any further once he saw how happy she was after the first trip, he would never stop her. Thankfully, Olivia's back today and she will be for the final weeks of her pregnancy. Anything else that needs shipped, Lindsey is going to take care of.

The sun is shining and it's absolutely beautiful out. Kaiya is asleep on my shoulder. It's been almost three months since her birth. I can hardly believe it. Every morning, I'm greeted by her smiling face and those big dark eyes that surprised me. I would have bet money they would be blue like her brother's and her father's. It's strange to think about life before our little girl. She fits so perfectly into our family and Lindsey is so much fun to watch with her. He's silly and playful...she's already becoming a daddy's girl. Sometimes I think she only wants me for food.

I take my seat next to Olivia at the patio table, hushing the baby when she stirs.

"Saylor Lindsey Buckingham?" Olivia suggests, looking up from her book on reaching higher enlightenment through birth.

"Please don't curse the child with that name. I got enough for it." Lindsey says through the doors leading outside, grabbing a banana from the fruit bowl in the kitchen and peeling it. He leans against the doorframe, finally deciding to join us on the patio.

"Yeah and he gave me Adams. Apparently my grandparents gave them shit for my name. I want to make it easy on the poor boy." River gets an approving nod from his father and I roll my eyes. Lindsey and I BOTH loved the name, not just me. Maybe he's forgotten.

"Fine, Saylor Jude?" Olivia says, getting nowhere with her previous choice.

"Jude is nice." River agrees. "Like the Beatles."

"Yeah, it's very nice," she emphasizes. "Take a sad song and make it better, yknow?"

"Alright, but Sailor?" River asks, the name seeming to come out of nowhere. "Why Sailor?"

"S-A-Y-L-O-R. It means ropemaker. It's German. I think it's kind of appropriate, y'know? Tying us all together. You to me, us to your family and to baby Kaiya." Olivia says excitedly, especially at the mention of her current favorite person, River's baby sister. "Or Sailor, like faring the wild seas. Either way, I think it's a great name for him."

"Mm. We'll think about it." River says. 'We'll think about' it is basically 'no' in parent speak and River is getting quite good at it, I've noticed. I, too, know what that means. When River was twelve and dead set on getting a real monster truck for his birthday, Lindsey had said 'we'll think about it' when I had given him a hard no.

Olivia sighs. "Okay, I get it, you don't like it." She smooths her belly sadly and he scoots his chair closer to hers, touching her thigh.

"Honey, it's not that..." He trails off, then looks at me. "Mom, what do you think?" he asks as a I stand to sway with the baby. She's woken up and she really needs the rest. If she misses her nap, my usually happy, smiley baby gets grumpy fast.

"Sweetheart, it's your baby. Name him whatever you want."

"I knew you'd say that but really, what do you think? Saylor Jude Buckingham?" River stares at me for a moment and I don't know if he wants me to approve or disapprove. Knowing he isn't going to get an answer right away, he turns to his father who shrugs.

I really like the sound and it's offbeat, like his own name. "Well, I like that he will have a J middle name like Kaiya and I think Saylor is attractive, different." I smile and he nods slowly.