A New Year's Kiss (BoyxBoy)

46. Lost in Dancing

Alex

I found myself getting lost in dancing.

Dancing was generally thought of as a social occupation, but I liked the solitariness of it. I occasionally danced with people, but we didn't talk, so all they were to me were moving objects to dance around.

Dancing made me relax, and let me get lost in my thoughts. Not always a good thing, I have to admit, but even bad thoughts needed to be thrashed out every once in a while.

The only thing that would guarantee to pull me back to reality was that feeling on the back of my neck. That tingle of warmth that flowed down my body. I didn't even need to look to know what was causing it. Jay was watching me.

I did look round and caught his eye. He smiled and waved, and I gestured for him to come over. He hated dancing, I knew that. But I also wanted to spend some time with him. I wanted to keep him close.

He started to walk over, and I felt my heart start to beat a little faster. Seriously, he looked so hot tonight. Screw midnight, I just wanted to grab hold of him and smash my lips into his right now.

I could feel a buzz running through my body, almost as if I had been drinking. Maybe I wouldn't need courage from alcohol after all.

"Alex, you know I hate dancing," Jay whined at me as soon as he was close enough.

I ignored his comment and grabbed hold of his arms, pulling him around with me.

Conversation was limited due to the loud thump of the music, but I got him to copy some of the moves I was doing.

I couldn't help but laugh at his lack of coordination. When he danced, he always looked like his limbs were too big for his body.

Jay frowned at me and unconsciously pouted a little at me.

It was fricking adorable, and before I could think about it, I spun myself into his body and clung onto him while I chuckled into his shoulder.

Jay lifted me up and spun me round, allowing me to wrap my legs around his waist.

He stopped, probably expecting me to let go, but I didn't. I just clung on like a koala bear, afraid to let go.

I could feel him cock his head to one side, then he readjusted his grip slightly before carrying me off the dancefloor.

I carried on breathing in his scent as he walked, knowing that this was soon going to end, and that I would have to explain what I was doing. For the moment, I just gripped him harder.

Somehow he managed to carry my lazy arse up the stairs and finally, feeling a little guilty, I allowed my legs to drop onto the floor. I didn't let go though. I turned my head and buried my face into the crook of his neck.

I felt him shiver slightly, then one of his hands moved off my back and stroked my hair gently.

"Are you ok Alex?" he breathed into my ear.

Was I ok?

I don't think I'd ever been so ok and not ok at the same time. I was right where I wanted to be. In the arms of the one person that meant the most to me. But at the same time, I knew that this comfort was about to be ripped away from me. And I was scared. It was that irrational sort of fear, where you just know something bad is going to happen, even though there is nothing hinting that way.

"Oh my god Alex, are you ok?" a rather anxious Sophie said, while colliding into both of us in a sort of hug.

The spell was broken.

I pulled away from Jay, even though my body was screaming at me to never let him go.

"I'm fine," I said, offering a sort of smile while my eyes adjusted to the light after being squashed into Jay's body for so long.

"Are you sure?" she gushed, "I saw Jay carry you up here - are you hurt?"

I chuckled lightly. "No, I'm just lazy."

Both Jay and Sophie looked at me, with a mixture of amusement and disbelief.

Sophie's eyes suddenly widened at something behind me, and I turned round only to be met with the most unwelcome sight of Kyle standing in front of me.

"Kyle!" I said, more out of shock than acknowledgement.

"Hey Alex. Jay," he said, and I swear you could feel the ice coming off him as he acknowledged Jay.

I cringed a little remembering how and why we broke up.

"Kyle," Jay returned, equally as frosty.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, then cringed at the stupidity of my question.

Kyle grinned at me and ignored the question, instead grabbing hold of my arm and dragging me away from my friends.

"Can we talk?" he asked as we moved away. My feet for some reason followed him.

"How've you been?" he asked, not waiting for me to answer his previous question.

My eyes shot involuntarily to Jay and I could see that he was in conversation with Sophie.

"Not bad," I answered, "how about you?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "So, so," he replied. "I missed you too."

My eyes shot up at his words. Too? Did I say I missed him? And then it occured to me. The drunken text!

I let out a ripple of nervous laughter.

"I forgot about that drunken text. Didn't you say you were in a relationship?" I was pleased I had remembered that bit of info.

"I was," he said, and I felt my stomach sink to the floor.

"Oh, I'm sorry." I said, and I was, in more ways than one.

"It's fine," he said shrugging, "I think he was just a rebound really."

I raised my eyebrows at him but said nothing.

"So you and Jay then?" he said, nodding towards Jay.

I felt my defenses start to rise.

"What about me and Jay?"

"I see you're friends again. How's he doing?"

To anyone else, that would have sounded like a friendly question. One friend asking about another. To me it was a deliberate jibe. A covert attack on my best friend.

"As you can see, he's fine. And for your information, we have always been friends. Just because we fell out for a while, doesn't mean I stopped being his friend."

I knew I had snapped, but right now I didn't care.

Kyle just frowned at me.

"He ran you over Alex, have you still not acknowledged that?"

"Yes, and I've forgiven him. It's what friends do, Kyle." I almost spat out his name at the end.

I thought Kyle would start to get mad, but instead he just smiled at me.

"I'm sorry, you're right. If you want to forgive him, that's totally up to you. I just wish I'd never let him come between us."

He reached over and grabbed my hand. The fact that he'd apologised, left my head whirling.

"I really am sorry Alex, and if you can ever forgive me, I'd love to give us another go."

I just stared at him open mouthed. I wanted to scream at him to go away and tell him I would never date him again, but the fact that he gave me such a heartfelt apology left me unable to do anything.

Kyle obviously took this as a positive sign as he leaned in and placed his lips on mine.

I pulled back quickly, still in shook.

"I'll leave you to think about it," he said, before walking away.

I watched him till he disappeared, then I turned back towards my friends.

But my friends were no longer there.