If Only (Rainbow Series #1)

Chapter 2

Kami na ni Luis

Kami na ni Luis

Kami na ni Luis

What she said keeps on lingering in my head, making it throb.

I stood up from bed and look at myself in the mirror

"Bakit ako umiiyak?"

My ghad Bea! What is wrong with you? You're supposed to be happy with your bestest friend Haley, now that she's in a relationship with someone who can be trusted. Dapat gawin ko din yung ginagawa ni Haley sakin tuwing may bago kong boyfriend. She supports me with whatever I do and that's what I should do, support her. I should be happy for her.

Maybe, this is what they call tears of joy? Yeah right! Tears of joy my face. What is wrong with me? This random feeling started since last week when Hal didn't answer any of my phone calls, didn't reply to my 100 of messages asking where she is, what she's doing.

"Come on Hal answer your phone!" It keeps on ringing but why the hell isn't she picking up?! This is my nth time calling her but damn Hal she's making me crazy worried.

Where are you?!

Answer your damn phone Hal!

Pick up!

"Iris! Did you see Haley? What about you Aizel?" Inistorbo ko na ang dalawa na nasa pinaka-suluk sulukan at pinaka kadilim diliman pa ng room at dahil ala na kaming klase bumalik pako dito only to found out god knows what they're doing. Napatayo pa sila sa gulat, ano akala nila? Tsk.

"Shit! Bea! Katok naman oh! Busy kami e! Panira ka!" Asar na asar si Iris, pano pa home base na ang laban e naudlot

"Hoy baka naman mabuntis mo niyan si Aizel! Wag kang masyadong adik! Di pa kayo legal oy, ingat!" I said grinning,  panong mabubuntis? E parehas silang babae, alam ko gigil na gigil na niyan si Iris. She hug Aizel and cover her ears. Pano pulang pula na si Aizel.

"Go away Bea! Leave my baby alone, porke ala si Haley kami guguluhin mo. Ayon, umalis na si Haley masayado ka daw clingy!" Si Iris habang tumatawa ng malakas, yung tawang pang kontrabida

"Yeah, right. Bye Aizel labyu!" Dinilaan ko muna si Iris bago tumalikod. Selosa yon e, bwisit na bwisit yon sakin panigurado. Like I care.

But what she said keeps on running in my head. Am I clingy? Am I that Clingy to Haley? Pero wala naman siyang sinasabi sakin, di naman niya pinaparamdam yon, in fact parang okay lang naman sa kanya. Iris!

While I'm on my way to the parking lot. I saw Cy walking with her groupmates

"Cy, we need to talk. Now." Napatingin siya sakin. Hinablot ko agad siya at hinila sa may bench

"Ano ba Bea? May meeting pa kami, what's wrong? Just make sure  it's important" unlike Iris and I whose happy go lucky. Cy's a grade conscious studentw. Maybe because her parent's pressuring her.

"Am I clingy? answer honestly!" Nakalimutan ko na yung pag-aalala ko kay Hal, instead mas inisip ko pa kung baka nasasakal ko na siya sa friendship namin

"What the? You serious girl?" Cy looked so surprise. Then she burst out into laughter

"What? What? Am I?" Sabi ko, halatang conscious na conscious

"Hmm. Sa amin hindi, pero kay Haley? YES! Kaya nagseselos ako minsan kasi di nako yung baby sis mo kasi may baby ka na" diko alam kung matutuwa ako sa itsura ni Cy ngayon, pilit na pilit yung pagpapaawa niya like duh. Aminado naman ako na fond na fond ako kay Haley pero...

"Anong baby ka diyan? Babae kami no. Si Iris lang ang bi sating tatlo" Pagsusungit ko, I don't know but something struck me and thinking about it makes me more crazy.

"You're so defensive. Is that it? I got to go. Kinda busy Bea. Ciao!" Bineso niya muna ako bago tumakbo papalapit sa group mates niya.

"Thank you Cy, I'll call you okay? Bye!" Umalis na akong school. I have my own car since I'm already 18. Nag-drive nako pauwi. While I'm on my way, my phone beep

Hey B! I'm fine. Sorry, can't answer your phone. Quite busy. Call you later.

Haley texted me. Siguro nga clingy nako masyado kay Hal. And I give up, just wanted to go home. I stop the car and reply briefly

Okay. Take care.

Maybe, I should let her do things at di nako makikialam. For I'll try as much as I can not to be clingy. I'm just a worried friend though

Kinabukasan, magkasama na kami ni Hal. She calls me early asking to meet

"Bea, I miss you!" Namiss ko siya kahit isang araw lang kami di nagkikita. Shit!

"Hal, am I clingy to you?" Diko na kaya so I asked her. Maybe, para malaman ko kung san ako lulugar

She look down. She can't even have an eye contact with me. I can see that she's hesitant to answer. I hold her face and made her look at me

"Hey, it's alright. I'm sorry if I'm too much of a friend to you." I smiled at her. I don't think my smile reach my eyes.

"No. No. It's just that.. I'm with Luis yesterday, I'm sorry I lied" Haley uttered. Tinignan na niya ako sa mata pero ako naman ang di makatingin ng diretso.

Something throb inside me. She lied to me. She said she's busy to stop me from calling and texting nonstop. Now, it turns out that I'm disturbing her hanging out with some boy! Okay lang naman na busy siya, akala ko kasi sa studies or anything important but to a boy?

Napabitaw ako sa pagkakahawak sa kanya. Feeling ko napaso ako bigla. She tried to touch my arm but I flinched. I stood up ready to leave.

"Oh, it's okay. Sorry something came up. I need to go." Umalis nako, diko na siya tinignan kasi alam ko namang matatalo ako. I just wanted to sort out my thoughts. Hindi ko na alam. Ano ba tong nararamdaman ko? It's wrong, very wrong.

Nagkaaway kami non ni Hal. One week din ata kaming hindi nagpapansinan. Diko siya tinext, or even call baka nakakaabala kasi ako. Then turns out, she called me instead, saying sorry and explaining. Pinakilala na niya rin sakin si Luis, and fortunately he's a good guy. Natiis ko siya ng one week, pero lagi kong hawak ang phone ko, having second thoughts on talking to her

After she explain, Bati na kami. Sino ba naman ako para mag-inarte? I'm her friend, just a friend.

I wipe my tears. Tinignan ko ang clock sa taas ng salamin, its already 12:40 am. I can't sleep, Haley's all that I think about.

I get my phone in the bedside table. I tried calling her, alam ko tulog na siya at makakaistorbo ko. I'm trying my luck, I can't keep this to myself, my feelings

After 2 missed calls. Tinigil ko na ang pag dial. I don't want to wake my Hal up and ruin her sweet dreams

One thing's for sure. May damdamin na nabuhay sa loob ko na hindi dapat. Triggered by the mere fact of Haley is in a relationship. Akala ko friendship lang ang nararamdaman ko, I tried so hard to deny it. I love Haley not for a friend, I love her as a girl

Babae ako at nagmamahal ako ng babae