Dear Thomas,

Alexander

Hey hey hey. I know it's been *counts fingers* like a month since I posted last, and I have absolutely no excuse whatsoever. Sue me (please don't, I don't have enough money to buy chicken nuggets)

BUT HERE'S A CHAPTER YAY...

"Hey maybe you went a little too hard on Adams. He was only trying to protect America" I said, my expression serious and stern. Thomas looked at me for a second, before we both burst out laughing.

"As IF! That homophobic mouth breather should know not to go against US" Thomas said, in between laughs. We continued laughing, and walking to our offices. The debate/ impromptu meeting had ended, meaning everyone had to get the hell out.

"Let's go somewhere for dinner of something" I said, holding his hand as Thomas and I walked each other to our offices. By now we basically had a joint office, so I just stayed in Thomas's.

"Like?" He asked halfheartedly, his attention on the papers he was filing. "Mac and Cheese sounds good to me..." he mumbled. I rolled my eyes and scoffed.

"Your pallet is as extensive as your vocabulary" I barked. He laughed, and shut his filing cabinet (they totally had those back then. Believe me without any proof or evidence).

"I'll have you know, this pallet only tastes the finest meals. I only cook the best things for myself" he said, puffing his chest out in pride.

"You mean your slaves make nice food" I said in a tone meaning I wasn't fully serious, looking at him out of the corner of my eyes.

"Oh it's ON shortstack!" He called with a giant smile on his face, running out from behind his desk to me. I screamed very loudly as he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder.

"This is my favorite mode of transportation" I said, recalling the last time this occurred. He just shifted my position, and kept on walking.

I was content, drawing little patterns into Thomas's back, until I started getting uncomfortable. This didn't usually happen. I looked up to talk to him.

"Why is this taking so LONG" I grumbled, and I would have crossed my arms had I been able to.

"Well I may or may not be going somewhere completely different" he said, laughing a bit as I gasped.

"So you LIED to me?"

"I wish you weren't so quick to judge" he mumbled.

"I wish you weren't a liar" I stuck my tongue out at him, even though he couldn't see it. I heard him sigh, as he gently set me down.

"Lexi," he started

"I won't respond to anything you say if you start a conversation like THAT" I said, turning away from him.

"You weigh like ten pounds. Now that we are the single best couple in the universe, I feel as though I am responsible for your malnourishment" he said, sincerity in his voice. I sighed, and turned to the man whom I used to despise.

"Ok babe" I mumbled, sliding my hand into his. "Now where the fuck are we?" I said, looking at the parking lot we were in (*rereads it after the third time* DID I FUCKING SAY PARKING LOT HOLY WOW THIS IS LITERALLY SET IN THE 17OO'S)(please ignore this gargantuan mistake). I didnt realize how far Thomas had walked.

"Ah yes. We're on a double date with Jeggy!" He said excitedly, leading me inside the fancy building I had failed to notice.

"Jeggy?" I asked, as he talked with the host man person thing.

"Right this way, sirs" he said, leading us toward the back to the restaurant.

"John and Peggy" he said, glancing down at me. We followed the man to a table tucked in the far corner of the fancy shmancy place, that I could never afford to eat at.

"John! Peggy!" I greeted them, sitting across from them, next to Thomas. The couple had their backs to the wall, and were both practically glowing. "It's been too long" I said, smiling. Thomas, who had apparently known them previously (please don't ask, I beg of you) nodded along with me.

"You're glowing" He said in Peggy's direction.

"Thank you!" John said, smiling. I looked at him confused. (Just imagine that meme. You know what I'm talking about).

John and Peggy stood up, their napkins falling onto the ground as the leaped up. Both of them had their hands laced together, and matching baby bumps. (This was supposed to be a serious, respected and accurate fic. Now they're both literally pregananant. You're welcome @korudoki and @Galactacium)

"How the hell are you both pregnant?" Thomas said, breaking the silence and asking the question that had surfaced in my mind immediately.

"How should we know? This is the 1700's, not 2018" Peggy laughed. Damn 2018 sounds awful. I bet their president wont be NEARLY as good as Gwash.

We continued talking about their pregnancies over wine, stuff like when the babies are due, and what genders they're hoping for. You know. Typical mom stuff. Not that 75% of the table is male or anything.

Well.

I'm certain 50% is.

No.

It's rude to assume.

I'm positive 25% of the table is male.

Well shit I forgot to account for the fetuses.

"Alexander?" Thomas interrupted my train of thought.

"Yeah babe?" I said, looking up at him. My lovely boyfriend. My caring and kind and ridiculously fucking handsome boyfriend.

Am I drunk?

"Am I pregnant?" I asked, my words slurred together. Surely I wasnt drunk. Nope. No way.

"The better question to ask is what happened to your virginity? I thought you just had it last week" he said. John and Peggy cracked up, and I slapped him across the face.

Or at least I might have. It was probably closer to a gentle pat on his right cheek, but I was sure he got the idea.

"Thomas, I am going home, and nobody can stop me" I said, abruptly getting up. I almost knock I over the table, as I stomped off toward the exit.

"Are you going after him?" I heard Peggy ask.

"Considering he's entered the bathroom, and he's not getting home any time soon, no I am not" Thomas replied, as i stepped through the door, not comprehending anything in the conversation they just had.

"Bye BITCHES" I called, flipping them the bird as I walked into the outside world. Or maybe it was the bathroom. The kitchen for fucks sake. I wouldnt know. I didnt make it past the door before I fell unconscious.