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nine

I woke up the next morning, ringing filling my ears. I groaned, not opening my eyes as I reached around for my phone.

"Hello?"

"Arabella, where the hell are you?"

I instantly sat up, squeezing my eyes shut as pain washed over me. "I um-I'm safe."

"Where are you?" My dad repeated.

"I'm safe," I spat. "Jesus, fuck, can I have two hours to myself?"

"Curse at me again."

"Alright, sorry," I groaned. "I'll be home in a bit."

"Arabella, don't you-"

I hung up, tossing my phone on the table. I rubbed my eyes, taking a sip from the glass on the table. I stood up and stretched, another groan falling from my lips.

"You okay?"

I jumped, nearly screaming as I clutched my chest. Luke stood in the doorway of the kitchen, sweatpants hanging low on his hips, not wearing a shirt once again.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, looking around for my shoes. "Thanks for letting me stay but I kind of have to-"

"You can take a shower, you still have plenty of clothes, I can drive you back to the bar to get your car."

I sighed heavily, falling back on the sofa. "Thanks."

"Sorry for kind of being an asshole last night."

I shook my head. "No, it wasn't you. Sorry for barging in and taking over your couch."

"Our couch."

"Who picked it out?"

"I did."

I chuckled. "Explains why it's ugly."

Luke laughed and sat next to me, his shoulder touching mine. "I think we should talk about what your parents told you...you know, about me driving."

I sighed again, rubbing my face with the palms of my hands. "No, Luke, it's okay-"

"I don't want you to think it was on purpose or anything," he quickly said. "I want to tell you what happened."

I nodded, turning to face him. "Alright."

"We went to Ashton's party, he's one of my mates," he cleared. "I didn't drink anything, you did drink a few but neither of us were drunk at all. We were driving home and-"

He stopped, clearing his throat as tears started forming in his eyes. I reached out, grabbing his hand and squeezing it softly. 

"We were at a stoplight and I was reaching over tickling you, grabbing your hand, I don't know, I just remember touching you," he sighed, running an anxious hand through his hair. "I was so caught up in you that I didn't see the light turn green and I just remember someone slamming into the back of us and you-you fucking flew forward-"

I gripped his hand tighter. "It's alright, Luke."

"Your hand slipped from mine and the car was moving and there was glass and I couldn't-I couldn't see you, I couldn't find you, they said you didn't have your seatbelt on-why-I don't-" he said, his voice shaking. "I didn't care about me, I just wanted to make sure you were okay but I couldn't find you."

"I'm fine," I said to him, trying to get him to calm down. "It's okay."

"I was only cut up a little bit, but you," he sobbed, sniffling. "You were bleeding, you wouldn't wake up and when you did, you didn't even know who I was."

I wrapped my arms around the shaky boy, pulling him into mine. He pressed his face against my chest and sobbed heavily, moving his arms around me. "It's alright, Luke."

"No, it's not," he pulled back. "Maybe if I would have been paying more attention, I could have moved, I could have done something."

"I'm not mad at you, Luke," I said to the broken boy in front of me. "I'm not, if you need forgiveness then I forgive you, it wasn't your fault."

"Maybe it is."

I pulled his face up, my hands on either side as I met his blue eyes. "It's not, do you hear me? There is nothing either of us could of done, I should have had my fucking seat belt on and that's my fault, okay?"

I leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead before hugging him again. He hugged me tightly. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay."

"I was going to propose."

I pulled back and looked at him, raising my eyebrows. "What?"

"That same night, we had been out at dinner, Ashton's party, we were about to go to rooftop, which is our favorite place ever, besides the coffee shop," he said quietly. "And I was going to ask you to marry me."

He pulled a box from his pocket, about to open it but I put my hand over his and stopped him. "Don't. Maybe we can use it someday."

He looked up at me in surprise, meeting my blue eyes. "You mean that?"

I nodded. "Maybe I'll never be able to love you like you love me, maybe that's a bad thing, or a good thing, but I wanna try."

"Maybe we shouldn't," he quickly said. "Your parents kind of hate me."

"Didn't you say they did before?" he nodded. "Friends, we can try friends?"

He nodded again. "I don't know, I kind of love you a lot."

"I don't know what it is but I can't stop thinking about you," I said honestly. "Even if I don't remember you, there are times when I can remember stuff."

I smiled and hugged him tightly. "I can see why I liked you."

"Thanks?"

I smiled and quickly took a shower, changing into whatever Luke picked. A big tee shirt that I suddenly recognized as Lukes and a pair of leggings. 

"Luke?"

A heard a soft pitter patter of feet before he stood in front of the door. "This is your shirt, right?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "It's your favorite."

"I know."

He just smiled at me again. I grabbed my purse and thanked him again for everything, even though he insisted on driving back to the bar, it was only a few blocks. I could handle it.

"By the way, I got your letter."

"You read it?"

I nodded, hugging him again. "Thank you."

"What kind of man would I be if I gave up on the girl I loved?"

"A shitty one." I smiled, kissing his cheek softly.

"Here's the next one," he said, handing me a letter. "I wrote it last night."

"Thank you."

"Anything for you, Bell."