more ↠ lrh

eight

"David, stop!" I was screaming.

His hands were on me, my hands were trying to push his away. "Come on, Arabella, we've been together for almost five years."

"David, stop, I'm not having sex with you!" I pushed him hands off, standing up.

He grabbed my arm, spinning me around, his hand pressing into my throat. "What the fuck, Bella?"

"Please, stop." I said, my breath starting to become shallow.

I fought against his arms, pushing and shoving. Then he hit me.

I sat up straight in my bed, clutching my throat as I struggled to breathe. 

I calmed down after a few minutes, looking at the clock. It was only midnight. I needed a drink.

Anything to take my mind off everything. After spending the day with David, he plagued my dreams. We broke up because he hit me. I left him for Luke. Luke was gentle, he was loving, David was rough and mean. I remember that now.

I grabbed my new phone and the keys to my parents car, heading downtown and to the nearest bar I could remember.

I stepped inside, the smell of alcohol engulfing me. "Hey, doll, what do you want to drink?"

I sighed and sat at the bar, resting my chin on my hand. "Your strongest."

"One of those night?"

"Of many."

He just smiled and made me a drink, setting it in front of me. I sipped it, so many different things racking my brain.

Why wouldn't my parents tell me about David? Why would they let him back into their house after he abused me? Why wouldn't Luke tell me?

Everything always came back to Luke. Why couldn't I fucking remember him? I just wanted everything to go back to normal. I just wanted to love Luke the way he loved me but I couldn't because I don't even know who he is.

I quickly downed the next drink, willing the thoughts away.

An hour later, I was drunk. 

The bartender took my keys so I was stuck walking. The nearest place was home, so I nearly stumbled my way there.

I knocked on the door, leaning against the doorframe. The door opened and he stood on the other side, his eyes widening at the sight of me.

"Arabella." He said.

"Luke." I repeated, pushing past him and inside.

I sighed as I sat on the couch, moving to where I was laying down, looking at the ceiling.

He hovered over me, his eyes meeting mine. "What's up?"

"The sky." I mumbled, rubbing my eyes.

Luke chuckled, moving my legs and sitting down, putting them on his lap. "How much did you drink?"

"Hmm, I had a lot of tequila shots," I said. "He just kept setting them in front of me, what could I do? I had to drink them."

Luke laughed again and I smiled. It was a beautiful sound. When he touched me, I didn't feel icky like I did when David touched me.

"Why didn't you tell me David hit me?"

Luke looked over at me, his blue eyes meeting mine. "You told me never to bring it up again, so I didn't. Why? Did he hit you? Michael said he saw you tw-"

"No, he didn't," I said, setting a hand on his to calm him. "I just had a memory. They only come in my dreams now."

He started to move his hand, afraid of going too far but I just moved so I was sitting next to him, my head on his shoulder, my fingers intertwined with his.

Luke sighed, squeezing my hand softly. "I miss you."

"I miss me too." I said, closing my eyes.

I looked down at our hands, my yellow nail polish chipped, yellow polish on one of his nails. I turned his hand, my finger hovering over it.

"Whenever you'd paint your nails, you'd always test colors on me." Luke said.

"That's cute." I smiled, looking up at him.

He met my eyes, his blue ones filled with sadness. "Did we ever had sex?"

Luke laughed loudly, choking on his breath. He looked down at my serious face and chuckled, his hand moving to my cheek. "Yes, Bell, we've had sex."

"Was I any good?"

"Yes," he repeated, smiling. "You were fantastic."

"How many times?"

He put his head back against the sofa and bit his lip, thinking. "Oh god, I don't know. It was a lot."

"That's funny." I smiled, snuggling into his shoulder.

"Why's that?"

"David and I never had sex," I said to him. "I hated when he touched me. When you touch me, it's different."

He pulled our fingers apart and wrapping an arm around my shoulder, sighing deeply. "Did we ever do some kinky stuff?"

He laughed again, looking down at me. "I'm not telling you."

"Was it really that bad?"

"There are handcuffs-"

"Oh god, we didn't." I covered my reddening face, pulling my knees into my chest.

"They weren't for you."

"Oh god, I didn't."

He laughed again, pulling my hands from my face. "You did."

"That's so embarrassing." I chuckled as his hands went to my face, brushing the hair from my face.

"It was a lot of fun," he smiled, meeting my eyes. "For both of us."

I rolled my eyes, looking at him. Up close, he was even more beautiful than afar. 

Suddenly, I was leaning forward, pressing my lips against his. He instantly kissed back, his lips moving against mine.

I moved myself onto his lap, either leg on each side of his thighs. He sighed against my lips, his fingers going to my hips.

His lip ring was cold against my lips, my fingers moving through his hair. He suddenly pulled back, turning his head to avoid my lips.

"What? What's wrong?"

"We can't do this," he stood up, setting my feet on the floor. "You don't even know who I am."

I frowned, moving away from him. "It's not that I don't want to, I want to love you so bad, but we can't, you don't even know who I am."

"I'm trying."

"I'll get some blankets and pillows, you can stay here tonight."

"No, it's okay, I can get home-"

"Bell, you're drunk, sit down and I'll get you something to sleep in-"

"No, it's fine, seriously."

"Bell, sit down."

I quickly obeyed, sitting down on the couch. Soon, he returned with a set of clothes, a blanket, and a pillow. 

He leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. "Goodnight, Arabella."