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forty-seven

I watched as Luke unfolded the paper, his hands shaking as he cleared his throat to read it.

My parents stood huddled together, tears falling down their cheeks as their eyes stay glued on my casket. 

"I miss her everyday." Luke said, his voice shaking almost as bad as his hands.

I watched Michael wrap his arms around Crystal, her big belly poking from her midsection. I watched Ashton try not to cry, his hair covering his forehead, his eyes red and puffy. Calum stood beside him, rubbing his back softly, tears falling down his cheeks.

My sister stood next to David, comforting him. I rolled my eyes at that. 

"We could talk and joke about anything," Luke said, his voice obviously wavering. "We had this chemistry that I've never had with anyone else. We just got each other."

I was shocked to see Harry set a hand on his shoulder, calming him. Luke took a deep breath and continued. "But in between those moments of bliss, she could be mean and selfish. But we always came back to each other. No matter how long it had been."

"Because I always forgave her. Because I didn't want to lose her. Because I loved her," he said, tears falling those ocean eyes. "There's not a day those goes by when I know she's the love of my life. No matter if she's gone, I will never love anyone as much as I love her."

"I love you, Bell," he said, his voice breaking and his shoulders shaking with sobs. "And I'll miss you every damn day you're gone, baby."

I jumped away, my chest heaving with heavy breaths as I struggled to breathe. The heart monitor next to my bed continued to beep faster and faster and I struggled to take in my surroundings.

A hospital? When did I get here?

The door opened and a doctor came in, his eyes worried as they met mine. My head exploded with pain as memories and memories flashed through my head, filling in every gap over the past year.

Every single memory that I'd lost in the wreck filled my head painfully and too quickly, my body squirming in pain. 

The heartbeat monitor continued beeping louder and louder until the doctor shot some kind of sedative into my veins, knocking me back out.

But it still didn't stop the memories from piercing my brain.

"Babe, stop it!"

Luke stood in the doorway, cake batter covering his hands and his face. "That's not fair."

"Don't bring that batter in here, Luke, I swear, I'm not cleaning it up!" I yelled at him. "If you bring that in here, you're mopping up later!"

Luke just ignored everything I said and ran forward, tackling me to the ground, his cake batter shirt rubbing against mine. I groaned as he hovered above me, his elbows on either side of my head.

He took a hand and wiped it over my face, loud laughs falling from his mouth. He leaned down and licked it from my face, giggles falling from his lips.

"Wow, I have cake batter and saliva on me, gee thanks, baby."

He smiled down at me, leaning down and pressing lips against mine. I laughed against his mouth, the taste of birthday cake batter on his lips.

"I love you." Luke smiled, kissing my lips softly.

"Love you more, babe," I smiled, kissing him again. "Now get up, you've got mopping to do."

**

"Luke, I swear on this earth, if you walk out that door, don't come back!"

"I'm not going anywhere," he said, setting his jacket back down on the floor, looking over at me. "I'm sorry."

 "You can't just quit your job like that, Luke!" I yelled at him. "If I didn't have my parents money, how the hell could I support us?"

"My boss treats me like shit, what did you expect me to do?" He asked me.

"There's nothing that could be done!" Luke replied. "I had no choice but to quit, he wasn't moving my position up anytime soon."

"Maybe we would if you would have waited."

"I couldn't," he said lowly. "He said cruel things to me. About you."

"He what?"

"He talked about your ass and stuff, forget it, I'm not going back there," he said to me. "I'm sorry, I just-I couldn't let him talk about you like that."

I walked over to him, taking his hands and intertwining our fingers. "You quit because he talked about my ass?"

Luke nodded, looking down at our hands. 

I turned around, poking my ass out. "Do it look that good?"

He laughed and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close to him. "I'm sorry."

I set my head against his chest, my arms wrapped around his torso. "I'm sorry I snapped on you."

"It's alright, baby, I love you."

I smiled. "I love you too."

I looked up at him, standing on my toes and pressing my lips against his. "We'll be alright, Bell."

I nodded again, kissing his lips quickly. "We will."

***

I moved up the stairs, heavy groceries in my hands. It was my birthday and I hadn't seen or heard from Luke all day. No happy birthday or anything. I knew he had to work so I didn't see him at the beginning of the day. 

I'd been calling him for hours but still no answer. Tears were already falling down my cheeks as I unlocked the door to my apartment, switching on the light.

"Surprise!"

I jumped, the groceries falling from my hands as I took in all the people filling my apartment. Luke stood in the front, a big grin on his face. All the boys stood behind him, along with my friends.

Luke came forward and wrapped his arms around me, pressing kisses to my neck and face, then my lips. "Happy birthday, baby."

I let out a mix between a laugh and a sob, hugging him tightly. "This is why I haven't seen you today?"

He nodded. "Planning a party is a lot harder than you think."

I laughed, kissing his lips again. "Thank you, Luke."

"Anything for you, baby."