I looked at Brinley, unsure of what was happening. She had just told me she loved me, and I dont know how to really react. I mean, Im in love with the girl, but do I go ahead and say it back?
"I love you too. I love you so much.." I managed to say, holding her closer to me. There was a knock on her door, and her eyes landed on mine. "Please... Dont say anything.." she whispered and I nodded as she got up to open the door.
I sat up, looking at my phone, reading over the fans reacting to the pictures. I shut my phone off, shoving it in my pocket as Riley and the rest of the group came in. Luke looked at me, and his eyes darkened. He knew I've been crying, I just nodded letting him know that I would be okay.
Because I would.
Brinley
I let in my friends, into my bedroom where none of them know what had happened within the last hour. They dont know the secret hidden behind my legs. They dont know anything.
"Hey guys, since you're here. Why dont we go to the park later tonight. They're having a showing on a big wall of a movie. They arent allowing that many people and I kind of already got us all tickets." Riley smirked. I couldnt help but smile because I knew that she wanted their visit to matter, she wanted all of us happy no matter what and I couldnt thank her enough.
-
I kept the same clothes on as we all walked to the park together, happy that not many people were out on the street. I was between Riley and Luke and I was kind of relieved for that. Its not like I didnt want to be next to Ashton its just that. I dont know if I could handle being near him after I told him I loved him. I dont know what it is.
I barely remember our relationship, but I know that something in me loves every bit of that Australian no matter what.
Riley handed the man our tickets and he let us in, we found a section of seats in a semi-circle with enough that we all can have our own chair. I sat down in one, looking at the screen then to the dew wet grass. I heard the trailers of movies playing and my mind went off into a tangent of things.
"Brinley! Come here!" his laugh echoed as I ran around the shop, hiding from him.
Every piece of me wanted him to catch me, to throw me over his shoulder and carry me through the place and out of here.
I hid near a wall towards the back and looked for him, "Found you." he whispered in my ear and gently backed me into a wall, kissing up and down my neck before kissing my lips softly and looking me in the eyes. Ashton's eyes beautiful and so captivating that I couldnt believe that they actually existed.
I looked around, seeing that the movie was about to start and I didnt understand how I got that memory of Ashton, when I simply can remember the basic things that I havent learned since my accident.
I led him over to the bathroom and got out of my shoes as he helped me and we both gently slid down my pants.
I watched as I let his fingers trace my scars for the very first time. Watching his eyes tear up and his hands being ever so gently upon my skin. It was comforting.
He was so careful and loving.
He choked against his own tears as his arms wrapped around my legs, holding me closely. "B-Brinley.. Please.. Please d-dont do t-this a-again.." he spoke, his voice so hoarse.
All I could do was tell him that I would try. I allowed him to carry me over to the bed, lying us both down and engulfing our bodies beneath the covers and just holding me.
"I want to protect you, I will never stop trying." he whispered softly, following up with telling me how beautiful I was. His facial features shown how much pain he was in as his hand grazed my leg, tracing one of the newest cuts.
I faced him, looking directly in her tearful eyes. I wiped away some of his pain, "You're too special to cry Ashton."
(Listen to In My Veins by Andrew Belle please, I listened to it while writing the follow part.)
I looked at everyone, and I caught him. I caught Ashton's wondrous stare at me, looking over my every move. Why was I remembering things? I didnt understand. I mean, yes this is a good thing, but this is also a very confusing thing and I dont know what Im supposed to do.
"Riley.." I whispered, she looked over at me and I gave her a look. "I really need to speak with you." I took a deep breathe as she nodded and we both walked over to an empty open area where the moonlight hit just perfectly and th temperature was a nice cool.
"Is everything okay?" she asked. I shook my head before hugging her tightly. "Im remembering.. I just had to flashbacks of times with Ashton.. I actually remember these things happening..." I choked out.
Riley held me closer as if this is the best thing she has ever heard in the whole entire world. I just breathed unevenly as soft tears rolled down my face.
"You remembering... This is the best thing in the world Brinley.." she choked out as her eyes held the same tears as mine. She looked over to the group of boys that meant so much to us both. I stared at one boy who meant a bit more to me personally.
I was beginning to remember who this boy was. I was beginning to remember our love story. Even though it is seconds of memories and not a full thing. A few seconds is better than a life-time of not knowing how good our love was. A glimpse into the past to express what I've missed and what I've forgotten.
His eyes met mine and for a moment I felt as though we were completely alone. That everything around us would come into place at that second. That everything will be okay.
"Cmon." Riley said smiling. I followed her back to our chairs, seeing as Luke and Ashton switched chairs so he could be next to me. I looked at him, looking at me as I did him. I examined him under the pale moonlight that left a radiating glow on the magnificent boy. He was everything I wanted and more and I couldnt believe that my memory was allowing me to remember him.
I was catching a glimpse of sunlight, shining down on me. I couldnt keep him out of my life even if I tried. He was the part now that I wanted to forget least and I wouldnt regret a moment spent with him. He was that sunlight. He was my hope.
He was my Ashton Irwin.
He was my saviour.
