Unbroken (#3 in the 'Outcast' series)

Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

"You stayin' up for a while?" Connor asked as I drew on my page, listening in to my aunt's conversation with my mom.

I just shrugged.

"So you want him to stay here?" I heard my aunt say.

She glanced at me and gave me a brief smile, but I couldn't return it. I just sat there and drew all over the lyrics I'd written down, not feeling like it was any good anymore. Connor stopped me and shook his head, taking the pen from me.

"Don't ruin that," he said quietly. "You won't be able to read what's on it if you keep going with that drawing."

"Who cares?" I asked, just staring at the piece of paper now, hands resting on my lap. "Not like it's any good anyway. Deserves to be drawn over and destroyed."

Connor just looked at me sadly and my aunt looked over at me.

"Andy, could you please go somewhere else for a while so I can speak to your mother privately?" she asked quietly.

I just nodded and got up, heading over to the hallway, Connor staying at the table. I sat down and leant against the wall, still listening in to my aunt's side of the conversation, Connor watching me from his position at the table. I glanced at him and he just looked back sadly.

"Andy hasn't really been himself lately," I heard her say, concern touching her voice. "He's been spending so much time away from everyone and he hardly talks to anyone. He hasn't been eating much either."

She paused, clearly listening to whatever my mom was saying.

"Oh dear. You think the depression's back?"

Pause.

"That sounds about right. They certainly all seem to be signs of his depression coming back. So anyway, did you want to tell him that yourself? Maybe you can speak to him a bit?"

Pause.

"Sure thing. I'll just get him," she said. "Andy! You're mom wants to speak to you!"

I got up and trudged down the hallway and into the kitchen area, my aunt watching me. She gave me a small smile and handed the phone over to me.

"Hello?"

"Hi sweetheart," mom said from the other end of the line. "Is everything ok? Bethany said you haven't been feeling all that well."

"Everything's fine mom," I said, though my tone probably said otherwise.

I saw Connor watching me, but I just ignored it and listened to what mom was saying.

"Ok, well let someone know if something's wrong. I just wanted to let you know that your father and I have decided to stay here."

"Sorry, what?" I said, the frustration making itself known.

"Sweetheart, we're sorry, but we want you to stay there and finish school. It's what's going to be best for you. We want you to stay with your aunt."

"So you're leaving me here so you and dad can live there?" I asked in annoyance, feeling rather neglected and unwanted right now. "What the hell mom?"

"I'm sorry Andy, but we've decided it's not much point to move, seeing as it's less than a year until you finish school," she continued. "But we want you to stay down there in California and finish school, ok?"

"Wow, thanks mom," I said bitterly. "Really shows how much you guys care, doesn't it? If you didn't want me in the first place, you should've just put me up for fucking adoption."

I signalled for my aunt to take the phone back. When she did, I walked out, going outside and sitting down with my back against the wall. A few minutes later, Tara sat down next to me, Connor loitering in the doorway.

"Wanna talk 'bout it?"

"I hate my life," I said as tears ran down my face and I avoided her gaze, just staring out towards the street. "I don't wanna do this anymore. My life's just getting worse and there's no up-side to this Tara."

I saw her look over at Connor before she looked back to me.

"Please don't speak like that Andy," she said sadly as I put my head down and brought my knees up to my chest. "We all wantcha here. Please don't do anything."

I just stayed where I was and didn't respond. I really hated my life and myself and I didn't wanna do this anymore. I was sick of always feeling like I did; it was always there deep down, even if I was the only one to feel and see it and no-one else could.

"Andy?" Tara said quietly. "What can I do?"

I didn't answer.

***

"Andy? Hey, Tara called. Is everything ok?"

Jake sat down next to me. I was still in the same position and still didn't move.

"Listen," Jake said. "I know things might feel bad and like they're not gonna get better, but it's all gonna start lookin' up real soon, yeah? Ending it won't help."

I glanced at him before going back to the same position; head down, knees drawn up.

"How would you know?" I mumbled miserably, just sick of feeling so down all the time.

My life had just been going further and further downhill and I was honestly sick of it. Every time something good happened, it lasted about five seconds before it turned around and went back downhill, pushing me further and further. The thoughts that were currently going through my head hadn't been around for a while, but they'd managed to make themselves known again.

I knew these guys were all trying to help and they didn't want me to do it, and I knew there was most likely only one person who could help me out properly, even if he didn't know he'd been doing it the whole time. Without him here to help me through this and most likely have to talk me out of this, I was most likely going to go through with it, and that thought scared me.

"Andy, I know there's something you want me to do," Jake said sadly. "You just gotta tell me whatcha want me to do to stop you, 'cause I know whatever I say isn't gonna change your mind and I won't be able to talk you outta this."

"I need you to call Ashley," I said back quietly as tears ran down my face. "He's the only one who can help me through this properly and without him here to do that, I'm afraid I might actually do it."

***

Ashley's Point of View:

Vic looked to me as my phone rang. The others just glanced at me as I answered.

"Mmhm?"

"Ashley? Hey, it's Jake."

"Well hey there," I said. "What's up?"

"We've got a real problem," Jake said, his tone worried.

I frowned and caught Vic's gaze. Why would Jake be calling me if there was a problem, and for that matter, how could I help when we weren't even in the same state? Couldn't he have just gotten help from one of his other friends?

"What's the problem?" I asked with hesitation.

"How fast can you get to California?"