omega (✔️)

[66]

[66]

[Namjoon]

His confident, marble like eyes flickered from my left and my right and I almost fell out of my chair. This man was literally perfect. I didn't even mind his stomach bile on me to be honest. Wait, that's weird. I did mind it. I minded a lot. I think.

"Every time you look down at your fingers or your beer, I want to just grab your face and turn you back to me." He said with an irritated look on his face.

My eyes blinked twice and I lifted up my pointer finger and pointed at his hand that was grabbing my chin violently, not that I wasn't into that, with a blank expression. He looked down to where I was pointing and when he saw what his hand was doing, he retracted his hand like he was touching a rotting skunk carcass, "Oh, well shit."

I was hurt, not gonna lie, but I kept my cool.

"Namjoon?" Jin's voice resonated throughout the bar and into my ears and I tilted my head slightly in response, "Why the fuck are you crying?"

Huh? Crying? I'm not crying.

I lifted my middle and pointer finger, bringing them up to my face slowly. Once they touched the space below my eye, my skin was indeed wet, "Oh, I am crying."

"Duh." Said Jin with an 'I told you so' expression.

I sniffled embarrassingly and wiped my eyes with my forearms roughly, wanting the tears to stop but they wouldn't, "Oh goodness, I'm sorry, Jin. I don't want to be a bother—"

A pair of warm arms wrapped around me and my sniffles stopped.

J-JIN?!

He sighed and used his hands to rub small circles into my back, "Chill out, dude, everything's gonna be okay."

I expected a sweet smell to be surrounding me but I was met with a bitter and sour smell of bile. Then my mind started to think.

Even if something like stomach acid were to cover over your scent, it shouldn't completely mask your original scent. I took in a deep breathe through my nostrils and my hypothesis was indeed correct.

"Jin, why do you not have a scent?" I asked into his warm torso that stiffened which was elongated over the bar so he could embrace me.

He slowly unraveled his arms from me and left my body cold and somewhat lonely. He looked at me with cold eyes before responding, "You tell your story first."

I nodded, agreeing that that was a reasonable and rational decision for our situation.
 
[flashback]

"Good morning, Mr. Kim, would you like me to bag this for you?" Asked a small woman with a blue vest, signaling that she was a worker here. On her name tag, she had her name in black: Mary Anne. Her eyes were a vibrant green and her hair was fiery red.
 
A foreigner.
 
I shook my head with a small, genuine smile and lifted my right hand that had a black brace wrapped around it tightly, "No, but I've broken my right hand so would you be so kind as to help me bring it to my car?"

She nodded and her face had this expression of "of course", since it was pretty much custom to be nice in this neighborhood. She held the large water container with both of her hands, arching her back so she could hold it at an angle. She smiled at me, waiting for my signal to go. I responded by walking in front, leading her around to the back were my car was parked. Opening up the trunk with my left hand, I signaled for her to put it there. Once she had set it down, she huffed a breath and wiped her sweaty forehead with her forearm, "Whoo~ I need to start working ou— AHH"

I had pushed this woman into the trunk, knowing that her small body would fit for sure. Before closing it, I made sure none of her limbs were in the way. Her screams were barely heard but they were audible and I knew that I needed to get out of here. I calmly walked to the driver's seat and turned on the car.

I sighed heavily through my nose, taking off the brace from my right hand, throwing it into the passenger's seat apathetically. I used my left hand to slowly massage my sore wrist from wearing that stupid brace for the two hours it took to get me to this stupid neighborhood.
 
After starting up the car, I backed out into the parking lot and into the street, already memorizing the layout of this neighborhood. I fluently took turns left and right, making my way back home.

"..ELP..! ..ME..!" I rolled my eyes at her attempt to escape but I just turned up the radio, blocking out her stupid cries.

[present]

"I know that I was a horrid, cruel man." I cried, salty droplets rolling down my cheeks slowly and pitifully, "But it's too late. It's too late for me."

Holding my head in my hands, I let my tears fall to the bar, making a few small puddles, "I've accepted that I'm going to hell, I have. But I'd give anything for these nightmares to go away."

I shook my head, trying to find a word for my emotions, "Their fleshy bodies, their painful cries, their pleads for survival.. all in the name of science."
 
I flipped through the files in my brain, earnestly trying to look for that one word, "These deaths, they all add up, Jin.."

Oh. I know the word.

"It weighs down on me.. my being.. it's.."

Agonizing.
 
I expected a scream to tell me to get out or a blow to my head, but no. It was just a painful, contemplating silence. I knew that my story and experiences were unforgivable and insalvable, but I told Jin because I thought that maybe, just maybe, he might hug me and tell me it's okay.

Please, wrap your arms around me and tell me I'm going to be okay. Please—

"Hey, umm.." Jin said awkwardly, not knowing how to respond to this situation, "I know that people do bad things, everyone does. Some more than others, but that doesn't mean that you are tainted or insalvable.. it just means that you need to be given the opportunity to forgive and love yourself."
  
Looking deep into Jin, I saw a light. A bright one.

"And I'm not going to tell you that it's going to be okay, because I don't know the future," he scratched the back of his neck and averted from my eyes, "But I'm here for you, despite your past and your actions, because you are Namjoon, not a demon."
  
And for the first time since I was born, I cried from joy.

[author's notes]

Hey this was a development chapter for Namjin and I'm just trying to get you guys warm and used to the characters since I don't particularly like the idea of the book being centered around two characters. As you can see, that's been implemented crazily.

Hoseok and Yoongi's backstory and involvement with each other.
 
Taehyung And his AB stuff.
  
Namjoon's scientific background and his previous wife Yu-Ji along with their child.
 
Jin and his past mate.

And then our two main characters that are suffering currently along with their cruel upbringings: Jimin and Jungkookie.

So be patient and wait just a bit more:)

I promise it'll be worth it. Have a good day and don't forget to comment and vote!

^^^ that was smexy