Cursed [Jai Brooks]

A Death Is Upon Us- Chapter 20

“You look perfect” Luke insists as I adjust my dress in the mirror

I give myself a quick glance before turning to face him

“I’m scared” I whisper

He leans down closer to me and rests his forehead on mine

“She’s going to be with you the whole time” he whispers before brushing a stray hair behind my ear and pecking me lightly on the lips

I nod in response not trusting myself to speak. Today is the day of Ruby’s funeral and my feelings are conflicted, in some senses I feel at ease, I can finally say goodbye and at least attempt to move on, maybe things will be easier. However I feel as if the constant burden of how and why she died will never go away. Will it eventually get easier?

I turn back to the mirror and glance over my attire, the black colour makes my pale complexion even more prominent. The dress clung to my body, the thin material made it breathable and more comfortable; I knew there was no point in wearing makeup because it would be completely ruined by the end of the day. I was glad that Luke was coming with me; I didn’t have to ask him, he was going to come with me to support me no matter whether I wanted him too.

It’s moments like these when you realise who you truly can depend on. I never wanted to have to depend on anyone but through times like this sometimes you just need a shoulder to lean on, I depend on Luke, I depend on his extreme ability to make me insanely happy, I depend on him to wake up next to me in the morning and be able to make me smile just by the way he sub consciously ruffles his hair, I rely on his childish behaviour to make me laugh like a mad women and I rely on his sensibility to hold me in his arms when I desire his comfort.

I was never much of a believer in things such as moments of impact, moments of greatness, crazy shit like that. People would talk about moments as if they were the most important things to occur in life, as if the task of breathing just wasn’t enough. These moments truly are the ones that can change your life no matter how small or irrelevant they may be. My moments seemed to always occur in the most horrific times. Yesterday I experienced a moment, one I didn’t expect, when I found that tiny note at the bottom of the box Jai had left for me I felt a spark in the pit of my stomach, something that I’d only experienced once before with Luke, I experienced it the first time that he told me he loved me, even though I was plummeting to my death I felt a warm spark lying at the pit of my stomach that soon over took all of my senses. I shouldn’t have felt that moment, I shouldn’t feel attached to that moment but I did.

“Are you ready?” Luke asks dragging me from my thoughts

“I think so” I nod biting my lip to hold back any unwelcomed tears

I took his hand in mine and headed for the door

I look around the church that is half filled with people that I don’t even recognise; it’s true what they say, the only time everyone comes together is for a celebration or a death. Uncle Richard greeted me before we entered the church, he had his new wife clung to his arm like a fucking bad smell, all of his wives seem to have one thing in common, they’re all blonde and seem to look much younger after the divorce. My mom didn’t bother to greet many guests, she headed straight for the church followed by my dad, and I grabbed a hold of Luke’s hand and dragged him inside. The other guests seemed to wait outside I’m guessing they didn’t feel too comfortable to be in the presence of the parents of the deceased.

“Mom” I whisper as I get closer

She’s sobbing hysterically into my dad’s shoulder. I look to Luke whose face only wears an expression of empathy.