When we first met . . .

Chapter 11🥀

I exhale "Thank you," I say as Shawn parks the car at the campus's parking lot. I look at him, he is wearing sunglasses and an NYC black hat, for a moment I forgot that he is some mega superstar and that someone might recognize him, "I had a really nice time" I tell him. "Me too," he says and my cheeks turn crimson.

I walk out of the car walking away from Shawn's car, not sure if I'll ever see him again and I walk to my dorm. Lucky for me, no one was at the dorm when I came, so I could change my clothes to take everything I need and I run to class without interruptions. I can't miss a thing.

After class, I walk back to the dorm to find Alex, Rachel, and Maya just sitting in the room. I feel like I haven't seen them in forever. Oh, I missed them,

"Hey there," I say. They all look at me at the same time turning my hello to something weird.

Maya stands up and comes over to me making me feel like a little child that did something really wrong.

"I hope you had fun last night" she whispers walking next to me walking to the fridge taking out a bottle of water. I smile and roll my eyes at her at the same time. I walk over to stand next to her.

"Why didn't you call? Why didn't you say you were spending the night out? Alex and Rachel were worried they asked if I knew where you were... I had to lie for you" I know, to just go out without telling... spending the nights out... so not my thing. I haven't done this kind of stuff since.. Darren.

"Hey what are you whispering about?" Rachel startles us.

"Nothing," Maya says quickly and before I know it her hand is pushing me towards the bathroom... Are we hiding? Why are we hiding?

She locks the door to the bathroom from the inside and at that moment I want to tell her all about last night, about how sweet and beautiful he is.. but I think I need to ask him if I can, or was it just a fling? Maybe there is nothing to tell because we will never see each other again? Oh my god, what am I even thinking? Of course, it meant nothing. I'm just one of his hookups. It just felt so right with him. I hate that it probably meant nothing to him.

"Tell me everything." She looks excited. Thrilled even, but why?

"What do you mean?" I swallow my saliva.

"Oh my god. What are we 12? Tell me. Did you guys do it? Was it good? How was he? Spill the tea sister" Ok... This is awkward.

"Ok ok" I take a deep breath "yeah we... and it was.." I blush. Oh wow. What an effect he has on me "And it was..." oh wow. This is hard to explain how amazing and mind-blowing it was.

"It was fine..." I say finally. She looks at me like she doesn't believe me. "ok" I confess. "It was amazing" I smile.

"Wow really?" She opens her eyes looking impressed. "so are you guys together? Or are you just friends with benefits?" She smirks. "Well shit, I don't know.. I guess not."

"not what?" she asks.

Before I can reply Rachel walks in the bathroom "I really need to pee" she says.. We both giggle and walk out of the bathroom, we walk over and sit down with Alex on the couch.

"So what happened? why did you sleepover at Maya? Maya said you were going through something" So Alex is in a snooping mood. Like always.

"She did?" I swallow. Maya said that I was going through something? Just great...

"Sorry," Maya mutes looking at me. I roll my eyes.

"It's nothing I just didn't feel so good," I say. I feel bad for lying but I don't want to tell. She will freak out and make this a big deal, she will probably tell the whole campus and I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with that. I don't want everyone to know. I'm so confused by all this. I don't know what even happened. What the fuck is about to happen from now? I just need to understand that it meant nothing and that it was just a hookup. And a date. And almost breakfast. But nothing else.

My phone pings which say I got a text. "Are you sure you're ok?" Alex asks. "I'm fine," I say on my way to the kitchen to take my phone from the counter. I look at my phone, and my cheeks instantly turn fire red, as I see who the text was from.

"Just wanted to say I had a really good time last night"

That's it. So simple. So nice. He wanted to say he had a really good time. What the fuck does that mean Shawn??

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Rachel startles me, I turn my head to see her watching me from the bathroom door, horrified.

"Who is he?" She continues walking to the kitchen taking herself an apple. She stares at me and before I know it my phone is over at Rachel's hands and she is looking through my texts. "What the fuck Rachel? Give me back my phone"

"'Are you working here?' Who's that?" She asks.

"Just wanted to say I had a really good time last night" she reads the last text he sent me starting to laugh and get excited

"You bitch. oh my god!! Who is this? why didn't you tell us? You told Maya and not us? We're your roommates you fuck"

"Just give me the fucking phone" I snap. I take my phone back from her. I feel so humiliated. I don't even know why I feel this way.

I think I'm about to cry. All my feelings are mixed up and I really don't know. I just don't know.

"I thought you said you stayed at Maya's dorm last night," Rachel asks. "Maya did you know she had a boyfriend?" Rachel asks. "What?" I hear Alex's voice.

Oh, this just gets better and fucking better.

"What?" I ask. "ok everyone breathe. I do not have a boyfriend"

"Yeah.. 'who are you working .. here or there' whoever the fuck that is... says otherwise" Rachel tries to take my phone, what the hell? I hold it tight in my hand and she lets go.

"Look, I went last night on a date. And I ended up um... going over to his apartment. I'm sorry I didn't tell you" I confess. It's the truth. Well sort of.

"Yeah, whatever" Rachel rolls her eyes at me.

"Let's go to the shop," Alex says, looking directly at  Rachel, not looking or inviting Maya and me, they both leave. Whatever. I could use some coffee now... I didn't have time to drink any in the morning. 'The shop' is our café house on campus.

"What happened to I'm never going to sleep with a guy on the first date?" Maya asks. Uh... Oops?

"I don't know. I just..." Why do I feel ashamed? I have nothing to be ashamed of.

Right?

"I need to tell you something" Maya inhales.

"ok... Is everything ok?" I ask.

"I saw Darren last night," she says looking at the floor. Darren?

"What?" I ask. Why did she see him? They have nothing in common and they aren't talking.

Maya is holding her tears. Oh no, what the fuck happened?

I stare at her.