When we first met . . .

Chapter 48🥀 - flashback part 5

~ Flashback ~

All way back to my dad's I was full-on sobbing. I don't know how I didn't do an accident. I barely saw the road. I just needed to get the fuck away from him.

I walked in this new house, that already feels safer than I imagined barely standing, feeling so weak, Maya's still watching the movie. "You said you'll be back in an hour..." She sounds confused. "You left less than 30 minutes ago.." she says looking at her phone.

"Holy shit are you crying?" She says realizing. She jumps from the couch straight to me. Hugging me tightly.

"I think Shawn just broke up with me," I say hugging her back not wanting to let her go. I want Shawn back. I hate myself for causing all this drama. I'm so lost, I don't know what to do. He was such a jerk about all this.

"What happened?" She tries to let me go but I hold her tighter.

"I can't tell you," I whisper. "I want to... But, I just can't right now. We had a really big fight over something... and now he's flying tomorrow back on tour... and we just.." I cry my soul out on Maya's shoulder.

"Shawn's here? I thought..." She is speechless.

I cry harder on her shoulder not wanting all this to be happening. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Just try to forget about him. We are going now to buy ice cream. And then we are going to go to the mall and then at night we are going to the... pub" she says. I groan. That's the last thing I want. "And we are going to have a blast. come on" She says.

I let her out of the hug shaking my head. "No. I don't want to go out. Let's watch another movie here and I'll look if there is ice cream somewhere here. I don't want to go out. I want to just drown in my own sorrow and die" I say whipping the tears from my cheeks.

"Ok... Lili, I think you are over-reacting. Yes, Shawn is a cute guy, very hot, sexy and talented." She fake coughs. "But... that doesn't mean there are no more people that are Cute, hot, sexy and talented. You will find someone better than him" she says skeptical as well.

"No, I won't." I know I won't. "He was the most amazing person I have ever met. And I don't want anyone else I want Shawn. You know what? I need to go" I say. I hope this isn't going to backfire and I'll end up more hurt than I am.

"What?" Maya is confused "I need to go over to him. To tell him t I won't let him give up on us" I say. I storm outside into the car, thinking about it for another moment and decide I should just go before I change my mind. I drive over to him leaving Maya confused and alone in my dad's house. But I really don't care. I can't just give up. I need to talk to him. I have absolutely no idea what I'll say. But anything is better than nothing.

I walk into the hotel once again and walk my way to the elevator pressing floor 24, waiting for what feels like forever, When the doors open I start to rethink coming here. Maybe it was a mistake. Right before the elevator doors can close again someone walked in opening them again. I took that as my answer and I walked out to his room number. I knock on the door waiting for him to open.

Every second that passes by makes my insecurity grow. I want to punch myself in the face for coming here. But I can back away now. I won't.

He opens after what feels like forever but in reality, it was probably a minute. I look at him from head to toe, his hearing is so messy. His eyes are puffy and his cheeks are pink, he looks bad but so good. Tears are filling my eyes for what feels like the millionth time today.

He looks surprised to see me here, I don't think he expected me to come back so soon, it's been only like 30 minutes since I was here. "I love you," I say the first thing that comes to my mind. I gasp at my own words. Shocked by what I just said. I look him in the eyes, he looks as surprised as I am. I move forward and I step on my tippy toes to kiss him, our lips touch and he pulls me to him, kissing me back pouring all his fear and anxiety into one kiss. He suddenly pushes me away making me go a few steps away from him I watch him closely, he has tears filling his eyes and I want to just kiss them away.