My Life Is Different

Chapter Two

*3 months later*

I'm in my room sitting on my bed in Karens house just thinking while stray tears run down my face. I haven't been outside since I got here and I haven't been doing my college work either, since I had to move I missed graduation they sent my diploma through the mail. I looked around the room it's small there is only a bed, closet and a chest of drawers in the room, there is hardwood floor and the walls are beige. I looked out the window and saw the sun hiding behind the trees.

I don't socialize with anyone expect to my dad who calls me once a week to check on me, I lie and tell him that I'm fine I don't tell him about the self harm, the drinking, the pills or the smoking because I don't want him to worry. My panic attacks and night terrors are getting worse day by day. I don't know how Jakes doing since Karen took my phone she says I need to focus more on my school work then boys. I've just gone down hill since the big move.

I looked at the bottle of pills, beer and cigarettes on my night stand and held the razor in my hand I was about to make the tenth cut today but someone knocked on the door,

"Payton sweetie it's me Karen" I rolled my eyes "sweetie unlock the door I need to talk to you"

I took a few pills with the help from the alcohol then I put the razor, beer, pills and cigarettes back in the shoe box and then underneath the bed then got up and unlocked the door she immediately opened it,

"Your room is just so dark" she complained "open up the curtains more"

"If you were smart" I said annoyed "it's getting to be dark out there isn't going to be a lot of light"

I took the picture of Jake and I off the night stand and laid on the bed caressing the picture,

"You still can't be mad at me"

"You're a bitch I hate you"

I closed my eyes while she continued to talk to me about my attitude.

-Jason's P.O.V-

I'm in the studio with Jake and the team along with Bethany. We all haven't been the same since Payton left. Jake hasn't been doing very well at his concerts and there isn't a smile on his face anymore, and when he takes pictures with his fans he always wears sunglasses and plasters on a fake smile his fans are taking notice it's as if he doesn't care anymore. The camp has been calling me constantly about how Rachel hasn't been participating in any activities and she's been acting out and she hasn't been showing up for practice. I told the camp about our situation and they are willing to deal with it. Bethany, the team and even Ms Thomas are not doing so good they hardly talk to anyone Austin hasn't spoke to me since she left. I feel as if they are all blaming me for her leaving,

"how was that?" Jake asked

"Take five" I replied

He sat the headphones on the mic and walked out. I watched him as he walked out of the room his eyes are red and puffy Ms Thomas tells me that he cries every night hoping and praying that she'll come back. It's as if when Payton left she took all of our happiness with her.

We're all just sitting here no ones talking just then I heard my phone ring "probably just the camp" I took my phone out from my pocket and saw that it was Karen I answered it,

"What do you want?" I snapped

"It's Payton!" she cried

My eyes widened and my heartbeat increased, "what's wrong?"

All eyes are on me,

"She's being flown out to the hospital in her hometown meet me there I'll tell you everything"