Dirty Little Game called "LOVE"

CHAPTER 22--- "It's for the best."

“I’d be lying if I told you that losing you was something I could handle.”

NAOMIE’S POV

Pinakawalan ko na yung taong mahal ko. I let him go because I think that’s for the best for the two of us.

Patuloy lang sa pagtakas ang mga luha na kanina pa dumadaloy saking mga mata mula noong sinabi kong hindi ko na siya mahal.

FLASHBACK

Nakarinig ako ng tatlong sunud-sunod na busina. I know it’s him.

Then suddenly, I'm now standing in front of him. Nararamdaman ko na nag-aalala siya para sa akin. Kaya bigla ko na lang siyang niyakap. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. Pero feeling ko yun na ang huling yakap namin sa isa’t-isa.

“WHY? What’s wrong?” bigla niyang tanong.

Binigyan ko lang siya ng mas mahigpit pa na yakap.

Hindi ko alam bat gustong gawin to ng katawan ko, pero yun yung sinasabi ng puso ko, kaya sinusunod ko.

“Ano bang nangyari?” tanong niya ulit.

I let a big sigh to come out of my body and think for a good answer.

“Let’s end this game.” I burst out.

After several seconds, I removed the hug.

Enough na para matauhan siya.

Yun yung unang pumasok sa isip ko na dapat kong sabihin sa kanya. Kahit gaano kasakit. Kahit alam ko kung gaano ko siya masasaktan. I will take all the risk para lumigaya na siya sa iba at makahanap na siya ng taong makakasama at makakapag-alaga sa kanya ng pangmatagalan.

Hindi ang isang gaya ko na baka isang araw, hindi na siya makilala, na hindi ko na maalala na siya pala yung taong gustong-gusto kong makasama hanggang sa pagtanda. Until, I totally gave up. My tears showered into my face.

“Why?” he grimly asked.

“I don’t wanna be your fiancée anymore. Hindi kita mahal. Hindi kita kilala, kaya paano ko mamahalin ang isang taong wala akong maalala ni isang bagay tungkol sa kanya? Dumating ka isang araw sa buhay ko ng biglaan at sasabihin mong fiancée mo ako ng wala man lang akong kaalam-alam kung paano yun nangyari? Malaki yung kabaliwan Carlo! That’s totally insane! Kaya itigil na natin ‘to. Hindi na matutuloy ang kasal.” I explained while crying out loud.

Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko.

Kailangan kong lumabas na masama para layuan niya na ako.

“Bakit? Bakit mo ko pinapahirapan pa Naomie? Bakit?” sigaw niya, umiiyak na rin siya.

Please huwag kang umiyak! Hindi kita gustong nakikitang umiiyak. Hindi ko kaya.

“Kasi hindi naman kita mahal, at kahit kailan hindi naman kita minahal.” I replied.

That’s my biggest lie in my entire life.

Please huwag kang maniwala.

Mahal kita Carlo. Mahal na mahal na kita, kahit hindi ko alam kung kailan at saan nag-umpisa. Kung bakit at sa paanong dahilan.

My heart only tells me this kind of feeling,

that I love you so much for no definite reason;

that you are the one I’ve been waiting for so long;

that you are my very best friend from my past life;

that you’re the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with even in my next life;

that you are my only shoulder to cry on;

the very best memory that I could never forget;

and the only person in my life that even how much I don’t remember anything about, it’s my heart who will tell me to trust and love you over and over again.

I love you that much Carlo.

And without any hesitations, he hugged me and whispered...

“Okay! If that’s what you want. Fine! I won’t beg you to stay.

But please remember this, you may not remember my name, you may not remember my face, but one thing is for sure, the memories we shared together the very first time I met you and the sweet memories we have after the day I said to you that you were my fiancée will always hunt you wherever you may go.

Please take good care of yourself; I will always love you my Naomie.”

Then, he kissed my forehead.

So this is really goodbye for the two of us.

I cried even harder after hearing those words coming from him.

Then it started to rain heavy.

Parang nakikisabay talaga siya sa nararamdaman ko ngayon.

Parang yung kanina lang masaya ako ng makita ko siya kasing ganda ng sikat ng araw nung umaga. Pero biglang nagbago ng bumuhos ang ulan, kasing lakas ng pagdaloy ng mga luha sa aking mga mata ang hatid na lungkot nito sa buhay ko.

I’m the first one to remove the hug.

Ayoko ng dagdagan pa ang sakit nararamdaman niya ngayon. Ayoko ng makita kung paano siya nahihirapan. Kung pwede ko lang sanang akuin lahat ng sakit na nararanasan niya ngayon, handa akong kunin yun para sa kanya.

But I can’t do anything to lessen the pain we both feel right now. I left him there, standing in the middle of the road, in the middle of the pouring rain, in the middle of deepest pain of my heart.

“Sorry... I’m so sorry...” I said far away from him and started going back to our house.

I don’t want him to see me unknowingly love him;

I don’t want him to know that I can’t even remember his face nor his name, for his the only person that this heart truly loved;

that I don’t want him to love me because of mercy on my situation for he can even have a beautiful and happy life with someone else.

I’m sorry Carlo. I’m very sorry.

I just break down and cry.

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(AUTHOR'S NOTE)

Sino nakaranas ng ganyan? Ang iwan ang taong mahal na mahal mo dahil yun ang mas makakabuti para sa inyong dalawa...

LOVE IS SACRIFICE! XD

Tapos na ako magcheck ng test paper.. Isiningit ko lang tong 2 CHAPTERS... hehe

THANK YOU READERS!!! MWAH!!! <3