Absolute Insanity (Abused Male Reader)

Girlfriend Problems

1st Person

I was sitting in RWB's dorm with Tallon, while wearing my new outfit I bought yesterday. We were just chilling and I believe Tallon likes Ruby as well as vice versa. We were having fun, flirting (in mine, Blake, Tallon and Ruby's case), eating and drinking. All in all, we were having a good time, until Ozcock decided it would be fun to ruin mine and Blake's fun.

You: *Sigh* Might as well go to his office. *Smiles like Alucard* In style.

3rd Person

All Ozpin could hear was faint "White Rabbit" by Egypt Central. He sighs, then he hear insane laughter coming from what sounded like in the walls

1st Person

You: *Pops head through wall* HEY OZZY OZ BORNE! WANNA SEE A DEAD KID MOLESTED BY YOU!!

I hear Oz scream like a little girl as I said this.

You: Pttttf HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! YOUR REACTION WAS PRICELESS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Ozpin: *sigh* Let's just get to the point.

I hear the elevator doors open as Qrow steps in. I run and give him a hug.

You: QROW!

Qrow: Hehehe, hey buddy. Your face still as fucked up as I remember?

You: Yep. *Pulls down bandana* Still fucked up as ever. *chuckles* Feels like just yesterday I got this.

Ironwood: Alright, enough you two, let's get down to business.

The three of them start talking as I grab a Bluetooth speaker out of my pocket. I set a playlist, connect the Bluetooth, and wait. I see Ironwood put his scroll on the table, time to set my plan into action.

(Imagine it's Blake's)

I start laughing my ass off as they just look at me like an insane man. I can see that they are visibly disturbed, as I continue laughing my ass off.

Ironwood: *Sigh* Can you please turn that off?

Ozpin: *Sigh* Yes, please?

Qrow: *Laughing* Good one kid. Hahahaha!

You: Ok-ok ok, Hehehahahahahahaha!! I-I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

I fall to the floor holding my stomach in pain. I guess Blake heard me fall and the moaning, as she comes in as a blushing mess, slaps me really really hard in the face, stomps on my crotch, and kicks me there as well.

Blake: *Blushing* DON'T YOU EVER DO THAT AGAIN, OKAY!!

You: *Holding crotch and in a pained voice* Yep, but did you have to kick me there? How can I pleasure you if my cock's gone? Hehehe.

I get a response of her pulling gamble shroud, in gun form, and shoots me in the dick, thankfully my aura saved me from being neutered, cause it shot straight through my hands.

(Timeskip)

I'm wobbling my way over to RWB's dorm, after that ordeal in Ozpin's office, I made my way to the door, knocking on it.

You: *In strained voice* H-hello anybody there?

In response I'm greeted by Blake, kicking me in the nuts, AGAIN, and pulling me inside, putting me on the floor holding my crotch.