Scared

Shattered.

Chapter twenty-three

I took in a difficult breath then chocked, unable to breathe properly. Opening my eyes I saw cracks of light peering through. I used everything in me and began pushing up, it scrapped me in all kind of places but after a lot of struggle, it began to fall and crumbled to one side. soon enough I moved enough so I could move out from the crumbled tower. My entire body hurt more than ever as I pushed up through the rubble. The second I was out, it hit me... my son was no longer in my arms

"Toby" I murmured as panic set in me. without another thought, I was ripping through the concrete as fast as I could, doing whatever I could to get through it. My fingers split open on the crumbed concrete, it didn't stop me for a single moment.

I called for him as I dug, asked him to call for me but I knew I was being ridiculous.

He would have called me by now.

I moved a large slab using my whole body to haul it out the way and then I saw it.. the blanket.

"TOBY, TOBY!" I yell as I push myself harder clawing the rocks away until there was enough space to wrap my hands around him, I pulled him as gentle as I could "its okay baby" I wrapped his covered body into me falling onto my ass as I held him close to me. "mummy's got you, I got you" but he didn't move, he didn't cry or whimper.. he stayed perfectly still "you're okay toby" I whispered rubbing his back "you're okay" my stomach grew tighter with every second that past until finally, I moved him down a little, taking him in one arm. My entire body was trembling as my bloody fingers took the corner of his blanket, I couldn't explain how I felt as I peeled back that blanket but the world stopped once again...

He was so pale.

There was Tacky blood down the side of his face. I wanted to throw up from grief but instead, I let myself do whatever felt right. I didn't just cry.

I screamed.

It was a different type of scream. Not one of fear or rage. This come from deep in my stomach, It was a sound I didn't know I could make. It was a wailing scream of pure heartbreak and sadness, it was the sound of my entire soul spilling out, my heart cracking apart. It was the type of scream that you never thought you'd have to hear and when you did, it made your blood run cold. It was a scream for my son, a scream of utter loss that only a mother could make for her child.

When the sound stopped I sobbed harder than I ever had before, My entire body shook with sadness. I cried so hard it fell between silence and gasps of air, I don't know how long I sat there for sobbing, could have been seconds minutes or hours. I did know one thing...

My child was dead.

Dead people needed to be buried.

The sounds of walkers got my attention and I saw them heading my way "let go toby" I whispered and got up only to fall again "come on"I grumbled forcing myself up, my legs killed but I ignored it pushing myself to the bags. I laid toby down for a moment while I put the bags over my shoulder, I pulled the sniper and rifle over my shoulder too before gentle picking up toby again. Then I took off jogging as fast as I could, I stumbled with pain but pushed myself as much as I could. With each step my body screamed, I was hurt for sure but I needed to get safe then sort it out. When I reached the tree line I turned around looking around the prison.

The tower was gone, walls down, fences laying on the ground. Not a living person insight and I don't blame them, it belonged to the dead now. turning around I walked further into the woods. I kept walking and walking until I found it. An open space, shade during the day but you could see the clear skies and stars at night. the creak was making a lovely rushing sound as the sunlight bounced off it. I put Toby and everything down before pulling out a knife.