No Filter

Chapter LXIII (63)

It took three days before I was able to get checked out of the hospital. However, Ally hasn't woken up yet. It's been over a week. I was getting more worried by the day. Zayn and Harry tried to cool me down, and sometimes, I would. Other times, I would argue back. My patience was wearing thin. They told me to get some rest back at the house.

I stood in my room as the thought of her didn't leave my mind. Bear asked me earlier if Ally was going to be alright. I told him that she will be. Nate and Lizzie took him to go see her yesterday. I watched him hold her hand as he wished she could see him and everyone else. I wish that she would open her eyes. I pace back and forth in front of my bed, getting frustrated. If something happens to her, it would be my fault. Victor only came for her because of me.

After a moment, I stop and look at the book on the table. I pick it up, and my fingers trace the title imprinted on it before I abruptly pitch it across the room and cause a small crack in the wall. I growl and smash my fists on the table. I push everything off and flip the table.

I listen to my breathing and sniff the air deeper. I hear footsteps approaching my door. Someone knocked on my door. I didn't open it. I didn't want to see anyone at the moment. However, they unlock the door and swing the door wide open. I turn and see Zayn and Harry at the door.

"What is going on in here?" Harry asks. He looks at the mess on the floor and widens his eyes in shock.

"Is this really necessary?" Zayn asks. "I understand that you're upset, Liam, but you don't have to take out your anger like this."

"Easy for you to say," I said. "You got liquor and smokes. I can't take those because I promise Ally that I wouldn't do them anymore."

"She isn't here at the moment," Zayn points out. "And she would want you to stop with your rage. Smoking is a coping mechanism. If you're angered, just asked me. I got your back."

I thought for a moment about the taste of alcohol and cigarettes. The only question I asked was 'do I missed them?' Ally would be furious with me if she found out, but she doesn't have to. It will be just this once. I nod my head. "Give me one," I said.

Zayn smiles. He holds my shoulder and shakes it a little. "Attaboy," he says. He unravels the box of cigarettes in his pocket and grabs one. He hands it to me, and I place the cigarette in between my teeth. Zayn hands me the lighter, and I burn the end of it.

I suck in the chemicals and feel my worries going away. I remove the cigarette and let out a puff of smoke. This was too good to give up. But it's only for this time.

"How do you feel?" Zayn asks.

"Refreshed," I answer. I do miss doing this.
—
I held her hand firmly, squeezing it a little. I watch her eyes, hoping they would open at any moment. I plead silently, "Wake up, Ally."

Lauren and Niall are with me in the room. They sat down on the couch, having their own conversation. They were talking about their relationship. Something about taking it to the next level, but I didn't paid much attention.

Harry and Normani's wedding is soon to arrive. They said they might make it in May. I'm really happy for them. Now, Niall and me are going to be the only ones who aren't married.

From what I heard and been told, Camila gave birth to Cole, Zayn and her third child and first son, back in November. They are a complete family. And Dinah and Louis are well for six years. They haven't discuss about having kids yet, but Louis has been around that subject with her.

Then there is Ally and me. We are complicated, but I hope that has change. I have always loved her for as long as I can remember. I wish I was braver back then. If I was, Ally and I would have been different. But I wouldn't have my son, and he is my world at the moment. If it wasn't for Ally though, he wouldn't have given me a chance. If it wasn't for Ally, I would still be drinking and smoking. She changed me, and I can't thank her enough. She deserved better.

I see her eyelids twitching, and I got on the edge of my seat. Her eyes flutter, and I let out a breath of relief. I lean a little forward and greet, "Hi." She looked puzzled and exhausted. "We're in the hospital. How are you feeling?"

"Better," she croaks. "H-How long have I been sleeping?"

"Almost two weeks," I answer. "You need plenty of rest. You blacked out in my arms, remember?"

Her eyes widen. "Did you get hurt? Did he shoot you?" She looks at me, her eyes full of worry.

I smile at how cute she looked as my heart skips a beat. "No," I answer. "Zayn, Harry, Louis, and Niall came to our rescue."

Suddenly, I feel two presence behind me. I knew it was Niall and Lauren.

"Hi, Ally," Lauren greets.

Ally shifts her eyes on them and greets back, "Hi."

"How are you feeling?" Niall asks.

"Better," she answers. Her lips form a small smile. She wets her lips and says, "I'm kind of thirsty."

"I'm on it," Lauren says.

As she got the water, Ally and I exchange a small look. It was a matter of time before I can ask her. I didn't want to talk about it in front of Niall and Lauren, knowing they will definitely comment something 'lovey-dovey'.

"Here," Lauren says.

I look over my shoulder and see Lauren holding out the cup of water for me. I take it and stand up. I help Ally lift her back, just enough so she could drink. I hand her the cup, and we both held it as she takes a sip. She lets out a heavy breath.

"Thank you," she says.

I hand the cup back to Lauren and help Ally lay back down on her back. She steadies her breath and asks, "Where are the other girls?"

I answer, "They're at my house."

"They will come and visit in a bit," Lauren says. "I texted them that you just woke up, and they should be here."

She nods her head slightly. "I miss them. I can't wait to see them again."

"We've all been praying for you to be well," Lauren says. "And now, you are. That Victor is lucky that we know how to show mercy, unlike him. He didn't deserve to make it out without an injury."

"Lauren, it's alright," Ally says. "I'm just glad no one is really hurt. That is all that matters. And that is what's most important." I touch her hand and give her an assuring smile.

In the next couple of minutes, I catch her up on Bear. He's doing great. He misses her and wants her to come home as soon as possible. Mabel and Lizzie are substituting for her. However, he didn't want to continue learning without Ally, so I had a talk with him and convince him that Ally would want him to continue without her. He agreed and obediently continued to learn without arguing anymore. He wrote some 'Get Well' cards to Ally as well as me when I was in the hospital.

I stand up from my seat, feeling the urge to do something. Ally looked at me, puzzled. She opens her mouth, but the door swings open, revealing the Zayn, Camila, Harry, Normani, Louis, and Dinah walking in all at once into the room. The room was crowded with balloons and gift baskets. Ally smiles and looks at everyone.

"Hi," she said happily to everyone.

They all greeted back. I slowly take a step away as everyone hovers over her. This was my chance to leave. I carefully walk out of the room without alarming the others and walk down the hall to the elevator. I walk to the main lobby and exit the hospital.

I walk to the parking lot, panting. I huff, trying to ease the urge. I open the passenger side of my car and dig through the pocket until I found them: a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. I unravel the box and pull out a cigarette. I light it up and place it in between my lips. Once I light it up, I suck in the chemicals and feel the urge going away. I let out a breath, feeling at ease. I forgotten how nice it truly felt.