I stood there in my underwear for a long time after she went, just staring at the wall and thinking about what she'd said. She could feel my pleasure? What did that mean? Has she felt every press and stroke of my hand or has she just been aware that I'm feeling pleasure? She said that she felt as though she would drown because the loneliness was so great so how did the pleasure feel to her? A sudden surge of arousal rushed through my body, the thought of her feeling the sort of pleasure I had, excited me, made me want to pleasure myself right there and then.
I sat down heavily and looked at the clock, 1.10am. Why hadn't I felt anything from her? Was she so superior in the force? That thought made me angry. I should have felt something. Perhaps I hadn't tried, maybe that was the difference? I rubbed my eyes and thought about her hands in mine, how small and soft they had been. I thought about the nightmare and how she had appeared to comfort me. Then I thought about my embarrassment at her revelation that she could feel my pleasure, that she had felt my pleasure. I had to stop that. She was making me weak enough as it was, I couldn't risk anymore loss of power, no matter how wonderful it had felt.
I lay under the covers with my hands firmly clenched into fists by my side. I fell asleep with the uncomfortable question of what I would say to her the next time I saw her.
YOU ARE READING
Force connections
FanfictionStarts during TLJ and explores things from Kylo RENs point of view. Major Smut alert! Hope you enjoy ;-) I own no art work used here but love it all ❤️
