I Blame Wattpad for My High Expectations of Men

Chapter 27 - What's so funny?

~Flashback Continued~

"Yup. After everything you've just told me, my dear inexperienced friend, you're definitely not falling, alright."

"I'm not?" I ask, hoping that my sense of relief isn't short-lived.

"Nope, you've already fallen," Kelsey concludes instead. "And you've fallen bad, amore." So much for being relieved.

"Shit. You're using Italian on me, so it really must be that bad," I groan, letting my head drop so my forehead hits the counter that's currently separating Kelsey and I. 

"Sorry, girl, I'm just being honest with you," she says, but the look on her face when I look back up at her indicates that she's anything but sorry. It wouldn't surprise me if she was secretly planning mine and Ace's wedding in her head at the moment.

"Are you sure, though?" I ask, hoping that I still have a chance here before I really do have to admit the supposed truth. "Maybe it just seemed like I was into him at the time. I mean, he is a good kisser. Maybe I was just imagining things."

"Nope," Kelsey begs to differ. "This has nothing to do with your imagination, and everything to do with your heart." I bite the inside of my cheek, nearly drawing blood.

        It's currently 6:30 p.m. After I called Kelsey the moment I realized what my latest 'interaction' with Ace means, Kelsey being Kelsey, she immediately told me to come straight to the library to talk about it during her shift. And now, based off of everything I've said, Kelsey's arguing the fact that I'm indeed falling for Ace -correction, have already fallen for Ace- while I'm trying to find any other explanation that can possibly be right for what I'm currently feeling, and have been feeling deep down inside for a while now.

       Why?

        Why? Because I'm fucking nervous as hell, that's why!

        Wow, that's a first.        

        I know, right?! This has never happened to me before and I don't like it, Buffy. I don't like it at all!

"Well, maybe it just means that I've learned to tolerate him," I decide to give that one a try. "I mean, maybe I read the situation wrong. Maybe I don't like-like him but have grown to just like him now. You know, like a good friend and all."

        I don't know what currently makes me look more dumb: Buffy's voice inside my head telling me that I sound like a fucking idiot for saying that, or Kelsey's current facial expression telling me that I am a fucking idiot for saying that.

"You can't possibly believe the shit that just left your mouth," Kelsey tells me, more like interrogates me, with her judgmental, dagger eyes.

"Well, I don't fucking know," I all but scream out, ignoring the weird looks and hushing that I'm getting from all the quiet witnesses around us. "I've never been in a situation like this before!"

"Alright, alright," Kelsey sighs, raising her hands up in a surrender before placing one on my shoulder for comfort. "You're right, I'm sorry. This is all very new to you and I should be playing the supportive best friend role right now, not the one who wants to smack some sense into you with that bookshelf over there," she says, nodding to said bookshelf filled with hardcover books behind me.

"Gee thanks," I say, rolling my eyes, which only makes her smile.

"Look," she says, actually being serious this time. "I don't want to make it seem like I'm imposing any feelings on you or anything like that, but what you just described to me -as in that 'new feeling' that your guys' latest kisses and intimate moments have brought upon you- that's exactly what I feel when I kiss Hayden...a near replica, actually. It's okay if you're feeling scared or anxious about it, Lola, but if you really want any of my advice on this, don't deny it. If you do, it just makes it ten times harder to deal with because then you're running away from the truth that even you yourself are aware of deep down inside. Does that make sense?"