I Blame Wattpad for My High Expectations of Men

Chapter 56 - I trust you

~Flashback Continued~

~Thirty-seven Minutes and Forty-nine Long Ass Seconds After the Breakup~

        Uhhh, can I ask what the HELL you think you're doing?! Buffy's voice continues to patronize me as I make my way over to Campus Point Beach.

I told you already, I did what I should've done from the very beginning. I just can't believe it took me so long to figure it out. How could I have been so stupid?!

I. DON'T. UNDERSTAND! HOW THE FUCK DO YOU GO FROM PRACTICALLY CALLING HIM THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE NOT EVEN A WHOLE HOUR AGO TO BREAKING UP WITH HIM IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE STUDENT BODY?!

You know what I don't understand? How you can continue to be my conscience without knowing my true intentions? Like, what's the point of being my voice of guidance if you don't even seem to know me?

What are you- Buffy stops her own thought as I imagine the gears finally starting to turn in her physically nonexistent head. Well you...little...WEASLE!

I can't help the laugh that escapes my lips as I thank the Dear Lord that I'm currently the only soul on this beach. I mean, imagine taking a stroll along the shore -just minding your own business- and suddenly running into a certified lunatic laughing at her own damn thoughts...boy would that be a sight to see.

'Weasle?' I respond back to Buffy. 'More like genius.'

Well, GENIUS, I hope that little act of yours was worth giving me a full-blown heart attack.

You're a voice in my head, pazza. You physically have no heart.

Whatever, she retorts. I'll admit, your plan's diabolical. I'm proud. But what are you going to do about Ace? He'll never agree to this.

He doesn't have a choice. It's the only thing that'll work.

You think so?

I know so, Buffy.

Well then, can you do me a favor?

What's up?

Answer the poor guy's call already, she says right before my phone rings with Ace's caller ID blasting across the screen again. That has to be like his twentieth one by now.

'Alright, alright,' I tell her, my finger hovering over the screen. 'Oh, and Buffy?'

Yeah?

Don't think you're off the hook. I'm still not forgetting the fact that you actually thought I'd ever believe a single word that leaves that fucker's mouth. The least he could've done was make up a realistic story. I mean, come on now...Ace? Human trafficking? I'd have to be a complete idiot to believe something like that.

Hey! Not my fault your acting skills are on point. If directing doesn't work out, I think you've found your back-up plan...Now, stop stalling and answer your God damn phone already!

Okay, okay, I'm on it.

"Hello?"

"Yo, what the fuck was that? Where are you? What the hell happened while I was gone?!" Ace fires away on the other end of the line, the sound of his feet hitting the floor fixedly heard in the background. If I'm not mistaken, he's currently in the middle of pacing back and forth.