Iridium

Chapter Forty Four

"She's safe. You now have one less spot to fill."

"Sidelined because I'm too smart", I help Bellamy into his bright orange radiation suit "That's a first for me."

"Well usually every other time you don't listen", Bellamy replies lightly. I know he's trying to make me feel better but it does nothing to settle the anxiety building in my stomach. Abby is helping Clarke into her suit on the other side of the airlock, giving Bellamy and I a moment to ourselves. Anywhere else is crowded by Skaikru masses. As I fiddle with Bellamy's glove and the zipper on his suit, I think he's picked up on my uneasiness "I'm coming back Ave. With Raven and Clarke."

"Going up from here is a six hour drive", I warn Bellamy "Double that and it doesn't leave much margin for error."

When I go to grab his radiation monitor Bellamy's black-gloved hands reach out to grab mine. "Ave" he murmurs, his deep brown eyes watching me carefully as I'm halted in my step "I'm going to make it. I promise."

Rolling my bottom lip I nod trying desperately to quell the apprehension and angst rolling around in my stomach. I'm filled with so much anxiety I feel as if I could hurl at any second. "Keep this suit sealed", I instruct Bellamy "With radiation at this level any amount of exposure will be harmful."

"I know. I'll be careful", Bellamy assures me once again. If he's getting sick of telling me he doesn't show it, merely keeping the small assuring smile on his lips.

Sighing shakily, I take a seat beside Bellamy as Abby and Clarke quietly exchange words. Running a hand through my hair, I mutter "I should be going with you guys."

Not a second later I feel Bellamy's gloved hand rubbing soothing circles on my back, "You need to stay here-"

"If you say it's because my mind is invaluable too I'm going to scream", I bluntly state without an ounce of humor, staring at the concrete floor between my knees "I don't wanna be the smart girl. I don't wanna to be the asset. I don't wanna be the engineer. I wanna go get my best friend and protect you."

Not once Bellamy's hand falters in its soothing circles. "No", Bellamy hums despite me shaking my head in my hands "I was going to say because I need to know you're safe." Biting my lip to stop the tears once more from pricking my vision I spare a glance up at Bellamy's soft assuring smile. Leaning forwards Bellamy's hand moves from my back to cup my jaw, Bellamy stressing to me softly "You're my better half Ave. For once I want to know your safe whilst I go be the reckless one." Silently laughing I lean over and press my lips to his. It's not urgent or passionate as usual but full of love and affection. Our lips moving slowly together I ignore the silent tear which has rolled down my cheek. All I want to do is savor this moment in case it's our last. I hope not, yet the thought nags at the back of my mind. Allowing his lips to fall away after a second I feel Bellamy reluctantly continuing to rest his forehead against mine. Bellamy's dragging the moment out for a selfish minute longer. When he does lean away Bellamy wipes the tear away the best he can with his glove, offering me a brave smile which I can see straight through "Always Ave."