BROKEN - to be healed by her (manan ff)✔️

11: A Mystery??

Nandini's pov:

           I got home somehow completely immersed in my thoughts throughout the way....Thoughts that consumed...him they never left my mind.

That look of haunting helplessness, those orbs devoid of hope. A sight of his devastated self would keep me up tonight.

Was it really all a facade? One that he managed to pull of quite too well. The man I encountered on my interview day and the one I saw today felt like two different people in more than one ways...

What was it that broke him to this extent? What is it in that room?and most of all why in Infinity?

If my mind were a room it would be a real messy one now...I hated this, all of it! The lack of knowledge and the most of curiosity that clung to me at this point.

Frustrated at the ignorance mingled with the human in ability to see someone so much in pain and the utter helplessness of it is a bitch of a feeling.

Chachi realized me being lost as we gathered for dinner, with me being unusually quiet, she inquired about it . I gave her some lame excuse which she did buy to an extent....because what should I tell her!!!!

'chachi I am going completely crazy thinking about the state of a man who I met hardly a day before, the one who I claim to hate to no extent and ohh yess!! He happens to be my boss'.

Sighing I continued eating, I hate lying to her but I had to as I couldn't explain her why was I disturbed..hell!! I had no idea why was his state or anything related to him was affecting me this much.

Aghhh........These thoughts are making me go crazy!!!!!

.............................

   Night sky seldom disappoints, it is just something about being in this oblivion is so fascinating like it will conceal all your scars and secrets in it's embrace. And while I now sat gazing at one, involuntarily slipping some secrets of my own it humbles you down by it's capabilities to draw every demonic thought out of you.

Losing my parents left this void in my life I could not interpret they said it would heal with time, but maybe it just becomes more bearable. It was still very very prominent...the loss and I know no matter what it will always be, maybe a little bareable but still prominent.

And so these stars had the affection I had for my parents directed towards them, it wasn't just a fascinating for me anymore...but a part of me found her parents in them, in this oblivion that maybe somewhere they are still looking over from and that they will.

Stargazing is what brought me immense peace at times I usually do this when I am confused at any point in my life or when I think there's nothing that can get me out of a situation , when I think there's no hope left, the stars are where I go for help and I always find answers of my questions someway or the other, it seems like appa-amma are give me hope, strength, to fight with any situation that comes my way.

Today is one such day where I am confused to no extent and need their help. I shared about everything that happened today...his punishment to his devastated state, everything and sat staring at the stars once i was done speaking my heart out...I closed my eyes and leaned over the wall near me, in quest to find some peace....suddenly a name striked me cabir..

Cabir sir yess!! How can I forget about him. I guess he can help me with this, he is the only person close to sir and there are high possibilities he has an answer to many of questions... See didn't I say they always, like always have a solution to my problems..

Thankyouu!!! Amma-appa thankyou soo much for giving me some hope, I said looking up at the brightly shining stars again with a huge smile on my face and with a quick prayer to aiyappa thanking him I retired to sleep with a hope for the next morning to be good...