Sitting on the fitted bench near the arched window in their dorm, Remus let his head fall against the soothingly cold stone wall as he stared out in to the evening slowly fading in to night.
The grass appeared so calm and carefree against the dark blue backdrop that was the sky, yet still had an air of foreboding swarming its gentility.
Have you ever experienced the moment of undiluted quiet before hell rips loose? The sound of imminent madness chuckles deeply in your ears as your surroundings stop and freeze, turning in to nothing more but a moment destined to be forgotten. Maybe it feels like the gentle revving of a car or the mysterious sound of waterfalls in the forest, but always, always, it is warning of you of what is approaching in its sickening silence.
Chaos is coming.
Soon, a figure walked in to view, their feet clearly gentle with their steps. Remus jumped back. The view from their elevated dorm in Gryffindor Tower was rarely visited by anyone, but here a frame dressed in inky black jeans and a boldly designed dark shirt. Squinting, he watched as the wandering person planted themselves down on to the swaying grass, resting themselves on both their palms behind them. They tilted their chin up and Remus noticed the specific sharpness of the jaw.
Only Sirius Black would dress like that, choose the somewhat perfectly imperfect place to sit and look so angelic without trying. Only Sirius Black.
Remus' confusion melted in to awe as he observed Sirius for a few minutes, watching as he crossed his legs before picking the daisies up from the ground and threading them together like it was second nature.
"Rem, what are you doing?" Frank questioned, proceeding to break Remus out of his dazed trance.
"Just... looking... at the scenery." Remus looked back nervously for a split second at Frank whose eyebrows were furrowed.
"You alright?" He'd admit, Remus looked slightly lost.
"I - yeah, I'm alright, I think I'm just gonna get a bit of air, though," Remus stuttered, already standing up to find a pair of shoes. Frank watched curiously as he stuffed his feet in a pair of shoes before practically falling out of the room. He would get up and check to see what had Remus so entranced, but Queer Eye had his undivided attention.
"Hi."
Sirius looked up from his petalled creation, meeting the clear honey eyes of Remus who was fiddling with the hem of his jumper.
"How are you wearing a jumper in this heat?" Sirius beamed as Remus sat down beside him on the neatly trimmed grass.
"I get cold easily, leave me alone. Anyways, no one comes to this shitty part of Hogwarts' grounds, what are you doing?"
"I don't know, just felt like exploring. And I feel like I made Julian mardy," said Sirius with a small, triumphant grin on his face. Heart thumping loudly in his ears, Remus enjoyed the few moments of him purely admiring the boy before him. The soft curve of his nose as he looked up to the sky, his rosy lips upturned happily, the outline of his jaw strong with the words that he had constantly managed to defend himself with from those dirty slurs.
Whore.
Slag.
Slut.
But in Remus' eyes, he wasn't any of these. Sirius to him was a boy full of dreams and hopes who was dangerously enticing. He was a selection of dark red wines each with drops of an unidentified liquid in. Sirius was risk, but a hidden part of Remus would gladly take it, not that his mind would really understand.
Sirius' eyes weren't the shade of the steel bars he had up to block people out, they were the shade of moonlight pooling out on a lake at midnight. To Remus, Sirius was an undiscovered treasure, daring and tempting, who urgently needed to be found.
"Sorry, you made Julian mardy? How exactly?"
"Think he has a Mario fetish, to be totally honest."
Remus found himself swimming in the mass of Sirius' mind the longer he sat.
"Give me your wrist," Sirius ordered, turning his body a few inches so their knees bumped and the angle between them became acute.
"What?"
"Wrist."
Remus offered his wrist and Sirius wrapped his delicate fingers around them. Taking a long rope of white-petalled flowers, he brought it around and joined it once more just above Remus' veins. While Sirius worked with making an adorable accessory, Remus wasn't able to draw his eyes away from him, the way he bit his lip in concentration and how deft his fingers were with the stem.
"There you go, you have nice, sexy daisy bracelet! You can thank me later."
"Pretty," said Remus, unable to muster any other words.
"Yeah, I always have that effect on people."
Remus shook his head playfully.
"God, you are bonkers."
"Yes," Sirius agreed, observing his nails lazily, "they call me chaos for a reason."
Though it was past two in the morning. Remus, Frank, Fabian and Gideon had yet to fall asleep and instead of attempting to submerge themselves in the warm arms of slumber, they had decided to play loud music that they hoped wouldn't seep in to the corridor and through to other dorms.
"Remus, take the spider away. Remus, Remus, please I'm being serious, take it away. Remus!" Frank called, immediately jumping on to his bed and pointing down at the thick, hairy arachnid on the floor. Remus raised an eyebrow.
Frank looked like he wasn't scared of anything, a teenager who smoked pot and spoke like a roadman, but no, Frank was a cinnamon roll. He helped Professor Sprout in the greenhouses every weekend no matter what and battled through the swarms insects.
But if he had the choice to avoid them, he sure as hell would.
"Oh my lord, it's huge! What the fuck? Look at it!" screeched Gideon as he jumped back.
Remus started down blankly at it.
"You guys are wimps, it's teensy!"
Remus knew it wasn't, but he bent down and cupped the creature in his hand before walking out towards the window, letting in crawl out on to the ledge outside, breathing out a heavy sigh that he had no idea he was holding.
He stopped and stared outside for a moment, remembering how Sirius looked against the green of the grass.
A certain feeling arose in Remus' abdomen once more and no matter how hard he tried to brush it away, it only increased in strength until it was clawing at his stomach wildly. He swallowed hard. Nothing he'd ever experienced before had felt so powerful yet so delicate, so violent yet so calm, so unnerving yet so ridiculously wanted.
Out of fear, he was mad with the idea of knowing nothing.
Crazed with ignorance.
Until, you see, he wasn't.
first of all, i just wanna say thank you so much for the votes and reads in the last chapter. it got more than usual and i am so happy!
second of all, I AM SO GODDAMN SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING!! I WENT TO A PARTY YESTERDAY AND THE NIGHT BEFORE THAT, I STAYED UP ALL NIGHT WITH A FRIEND. I AM SO SO SO SO SO SORRY. i hope this little touch of nonexistent wolfstar fluff satisfied your cravings just a touch. i hope that i'll be able to get the next chapter out at a reasonable time. thank you so much for reading and i hope you enjoyed.
see you next millennium
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wonderland • wolfstar
Fanfiction"i don't know, it's just that neverland and wonderland are so easily confused." remus had an obsession with writing plays. being able to see them spring to life with the assistance of hogwarts' talented drama attendants was all it took for him to sn...
