"Fuck, Re."
"You're fine, yeah? You've done it before. Just... shut up a little bit."
"What, you expect me to be quiet when I'm like this? Practically pushed up against-"
"This sounds so sexual, goodness, lads."
Lily had never whacked James' arm harder.
"I was enjoying that!"
There, she and James stood, by the doorway and sniggering at their mates' accidental erotic conversation.
The two other flashed their eyes towards the couple before reviewing their current plight once more. They were in the dressing room, Sirius' back right against the dark varnished table littered with an assortment of cosmetics and Remus, Remus the bloody bastard, held a sliver eyelash curler above the other's face. It glinted in the sun peeking through the solemn day as he removed a hand from Sirius' shoulder. He dropped the one grasping that murderous utensil reluctantly.
"Good afternoon, Remus, Sirius!" greeted James much too perkily.
"James and I just wanted to pop in and say hello," Lily explained, though the wink she shot Remus' way proved that it was not to just 'say hello'.
"Just wanted to pop in and say hello," mimicked Remus, throwing the eyelash curler back in to the pile of makeup behind Sirius. His gaze flickered up in to the mirror, adorned with a track of presently switched off bulbs. He counted four scars on his face before he demanded that he look away.
"This bitch right here is violent!"
"I am not!" Remus argues, but Sirius shook his head and laced his fingers together, prepared to go on a rant.
"The both of you know that it took me a year and a half to grow accustomed to eyelash curlers and today, I can only entrust Elizabeth Connell."
"Look, you're an annoying prick and I love that, honest, but you just need to have some faith. I could stab your eye out. Of course I could, it would be simple as, but you know what Sirius, you deserve better. So you're a fucker, that's for sure, but you're a good fucker and I don't want to kill you yet."
"I've known you for seven years, Rem, and that is, by a long mile, the nicest thing you have said to anyone. But this is your soon-to-be-husband, you've got to try a little bit harder." Lily Evans swept back ginger locks in to a quite imperfect ponytail as Remus' eyes widened. It was an amusing sight.
"My soon-to-be-what?!"
"I mean, Lily's not wrong, she never is, it's bound to happen soon. Sirius has been fawning after you for like, six, seven years?"
"James," Sirius hissed warningly. Remus took the opportunity to (as unobtrusively as possible) quietly edge away from the other. Only their knees brushed.
"Yet for some reason," James continued, deaf to his best friend's threatening, "I'm the one that's always made fun of. I'm the one that's Lily's lover boy-"
"You are, but if it helps, I'm your lover girl. I'm not the only one in this room who's in an undoubtable love with you, though." Lily glared at Sirius, but he took no notice to her and instead he focused on his nails. He shifted on his dark brown chair.
"You're my daddy, James. But in two days time, I'll have to show all of Hogwarts my unceasing attraction to Noah."
"Two days," murmured Remus. He sighed wistfully and ran his hands over his face.
Sirius beamed and placed a hand on Remus' knee, hoping that the way it slid up wouldn't attract any attention (it did, by the way).
"Where does the time go, am I right, Remus? A month ago I was still sucking random dick and you were, in your words exactly, 'an emotionally closed up arsehole'. And now look, I'm no longer sucking random dick and you're no longer an emotionally closed up arsehole."
YOU ARE READING
wonderland • wolfstar
Fanfiction"i don't know, it's just that neverland and wonderland are so easily confused." remus had an obsession with writing plays. being able to see them spring to life with the assistance of hogwarts' talented drama attendants was all it took for him to sn...
