BAD HABIT |Billie Eilish|

iloveyou pt.2

I wrapped my arms around Polly's neck as we were in the middle of drunk dancing crowd. I felt her goosebumps under my cold fingers and her hand ended up on my lower back. I was hoping my skirt wasn't hanging, but I didn't bother myself to check it. One of the newest Travis Scott's songs played really loud and I pressed myself closer to my bestie and we laughed as she made a move with her chest and licked her upper lip.

My vision was blurred, but in a good way, I smiled widely at some girls, who accidentally bumped into us. It's been two hours, and there were even more people than after Billie's invitation. I got drunk pretty quick and I let Kendall and Bil text their other friends and now my house is crowded as hell and a lot of people are playing beer pong in the yard. Actually, I would love to play too, but Billie said me that drinking some beer after the whole liquor bottle was a bad idea, so I had to agree and just enjoy my party inside.

Pair of warm hands on my hips made me turn around and I smiled as I saw smiling Billie, who fixed my skirt and kissed my cheek. Her cold breath against my skin gave me goosebumps. I was about to stop dancing but she quickly disappeared in the kitchen, probably to get one more drink.

"Do you wanna go outside? I have some cigarettes and I really need a drunk deep talk" Polly said it in my ear and I nodded, grabbing her hand and dragging her to the front door. We managed to find some jackets, because it was pretty cold outside, and headed to my hammock, no one was there and I was thankful for that. We both sat, facing each other, Polly lit her cigarette with a lighter and gave it to me. I did the same and watched as white smoke disappeared in the air, my eyes stopped on the sky, it wasn't cloudy that night and I even saw some stars.

Polly puffed smoke and put her lips together, it seemed like she was unsure if she wanna say something or not. Eventually, she sighed loudly and put her head on her arms. I stayed silent, waiting for her to start talking. It was dark and quiter there than near my house, but I heard the music clearly. It wasn't that loud and our deep talk's vibe wasn't ruined.

"I don't know what to do" Polly almost whispered, puffing some smoke. "Roe want us to be serious and I don't even know if I want to be with her"

I leaned on my hammock, puffing a cigarette, and hugged myself because it was cold enough. I had nothing to say, I'm really so wrong person to give advices about relationship, I barely could doing well with my own. But there I was, with Polly's waiting gaze in front of me, so I had no other options then to give her my drunk talk and hope for the best.

"You know, you already have your answer, you know what you want, but you're afraid to accept it" I slurred some of my words, but she got it. "You are not sure about your relationship because you're afraid of what other people say or because you are not sure about Roe?"

"I don't love her" She said and I saw how upset she was. "And she loves me. That's the problem"

"Maybe you should take your time? It's not like you both have to be in love with each other that fast" I noticed someone, who was heading to us. But I was too drunk and it was too dark outside, so I had no idea. "Just wait a little bit, figure it out. Don't do something like that when you're drunk" I sighed when I saw Royce squatted in front of us, lighting her cigarette. "Why are you here?"

"Just came here because you're the only ones who are smoking right now" She smirked, puffing smoke. "Tinley, not that I was staring, but your underwear is visible"

"Oh, fuck" I sat, fixing my skirt. "Thank you, I wasn't paying attention" Royce smiled and winked at me.

We sat there in silent for a few more minutes, Polly didn't want to keep talking in front of her and I completely understood her. But at the same time I didn't want to be rude, so I kept quiet. That whole time I watched Isaac and Cyd who were making out near the barbeque area, it made my heart melt.