BAD HABIT |Billie Eilish|

Can't breathe

Time skip 1 month

It was a rough month. 

Isaac was depressed and I totally get it, I don't even know if I could handle my dad's death. And as much as I wanted to help him to go through this, he wanted some space and I stepped back. Cyd spent her every free second just to be next to Isaac and I was so thankful because I love him as a brother and I wanted him to feel better. 

Polly turned into a fucking bitch and I don't get it. I did nothing to her and all that she was doing for that month is playing on my nerves. She and her little squad threaten me for telling Mariyka shit about Noah and I was almost beaten up but thankfully there were people under the bleachers and I managed to walk away. And it was the first day I got rid of the plaster on my fingers. And actually it healed pretty well.

Dad said that I have to get along well with Mariyka because she's staying with us for a long time. Actually, we don't talk with dad for a week now. Mariyka and I had a fight and since her own room isn't even close to be ready, he asked me to live with my mom. I refused and. okay, I did it way too harsh but come on. Live with my mom? The last time I saw her she slapped me and yelled a lot of shit about me. So I stayed in my room and Mariyka moved to the living room for a few days until dad finish making a wall in her new room. 

Tate and Ruby are back together so I barely talked to him the past few days. Theo went to Hawaii, Atiya got a fever and the only people I was talking to were Roe and Stella. Billie was kinda ignoring me for a few days now but she texted me that she's coming over so I guess she has a good explanation. 

I cleaned my room a little bit, brought some snacks from the kitchen and picked a movie on Netflix. I was scrolling an Instagram feed when Billie slammed the door and I flinched. 

"Oh my god, you sca-" She cut me off, harshly grabbing my phone and throwing it away on my bed. I frowned as she grabbed my by my wrists and forcefully pushed me to the table. When she roughly made me sit on the table I hit my back really bad and gasped. "What the fuck are you doing? It hurts" I rubbed my back as she put her hands on the table, making me sit still. I frowned as she sent me a glare. "Billie, what's going on?" 

She stayed silent an instead of answering me, she harshly spread my legs. Her hand found its way inside my pants and I grabbed Billie's wrist, trying to stop her. 

"Billie, you're scaring me" I inhaled sharply as she pushed her fingers in me without any warning. I closed my eyes and flinched because it was really painful but Billie just kept pushing her fingers inside of me and since I wasn't fucking turned on I felt all the pain. "Billie, please, stop, it hurts!" I was begging, trying to push her away. "You're hurting me!" A tear rolled down my cheek. She stopped. My heartbeat was fast as hell and as she removed her hand I pulled my knees up to my chest. What the fuck just happened? I was looking at Billie with teary eyes, not realizing what was going on. 

"You're a fucking whore" She growled in my face. "I wanna punch you so fucking bad but you're not even manage to defend yourself" If felt surreal because we were good just a few days ago. 

"Billie, wait, I don't understand" I tried to grab her hands but she pushed me away. "Tell me what's going on" I cried, still trying to touch her but I was rejected every time. She found something in her phone and almost hit my face as she turned the screen to show me. It was a video of me, passed out on the party a few days ago. We were there all together and I drank a little bit more then I had to and passed out in Theo's room. He let me sleep there since Billie was with her friends and I didn't want to bother her and also I was scared to sleep in some random room and wake up with someone I don't even know. So, that was a video of me, obviously passe out, and Mila who was on top of me, kissing me. It wasn't the best quality so it was hard to say if I was conscious or not, but I wasn't moving at all.