Don't You Dare Tell Anyone Mr. Stevens

Home As If I Couldn't Say It Loud Enough

I slam the door shut to the car and open up my arms and wide. I breathe in the smell of Forest Hills, New York. Thank you God so much. Thank you for bringing me home. The lamp lights were still on in front of the house and mom curses while she brings the luggage's inside but I don't care I'm home. Ben goes off to bed and I sit outside on the porch. The sun rises. I sit on the patio with a blanket and until the sunlight kisses my skin. My first sunrise home for three weeks. Three long horrible weeks that I hated. Halloween was in 4 days. I couldn't wait. The sun rose and warmed my skin. I think that I could have cried and I would have. I felt so at home and at peace with the world when the sun hit me. I could finally breathe and maybe i'd sleep at night without waking with the dream still in my mind of Marcus strangling me. Now I no longer have to worry about him coming home because he's probably gone and hopefully dead. He'll be gone for good I know it. I can just feel it. Maybe that's why mom was mad. She knew it too.
I looked at the time. I had school in one hour. How I desired and ached to return to school. Ben and I slept the entire time in the car and I'm pretty sure he'd love to go to school too. I go back inside and mom was knocked out in her bedroom. She had a cigarette burning in her hand hanging over the side of the bed. I smacked it out of her hand and put it out. I'd let her burn in this house but all of my stuff is here. I get Ben and myself ready for school and by the time we're done the sun has practically fully risen.
I dropped Ben off and walked to the school. I smiled at the trees with its orange red and yellow fall colors. Last time I saw them they were still green. I let in air and it smelled sweet. "Home" I say as if I couldn't say it enough. I pull my uniform closer to me and cradle in its familiar polyester warmth. It wasn't really polyester we just joked as if it were.
I turn the corner and see Patty and Ethan smiling together walking. I noticed something weird about how he were looking at her. As if he were saying "I know and by the way i'm totally in love with you" while she just kept talking. I had to laugh I just had to. When I did they looked over laughing and froze where they were. I smile and Ethan breaks away from Patty and walks towards me. I do the same picking up my pace than I'm running. I'm running until I hit the corner. The ground to the side was risen made of stone with iron gates along the sides. I let my book bag fall to the floor as I crash into him wrapping my arms around him and hugging him. He squeezes so hard the air leaves me. "Tess!" Patty shouts and runs towards us.
"Ethan... Air!" I moan and we laugh.
"Oh thank god!" he says and puts his hand on my head like a jokester. Patty laughs. He presses my head to his chest and his eyes widen like a dramatic girl and he moans.
"Oh thank god!' he says and again and I laugh. His back grows closer to the stone. His knees become weak and begin to give out below him.
"Praise the Lord Jesus Christ!" he says with as much sarcasm as possible and he pulls me down with him.
"Stop that!" I say and pull away. He smiles at me straightening and stands normal. I punch him. "You moron!" I say and turn to Patty and she is smiling wide with hands in front of her like a hyper girl would. We open our arms and shriek. "Eeeekkk!" and embrace.
"Thank God you're home! And you're alright!" she says and I smile a little. "Ya" I say and pull down my jacket sleeve. "I'm fine" I say and look at her. Her smile is so bright and wide she doesn't notice the uneasiness in my smile. Right after I got off the phone with Ethan she almost caught me. She slammed the car door shut with my arm in it. There was a bruise a huge one. it didn't hurt too much. Probably because it was so big.
We walked the next block together than the next until Ethan parted for school. I finally felt at home and at peace with myself. I felt normal. We pass the open gates into the school and walk up the cobble stone path and the grass is still a vibrant green. I tell Patty what happens and she sighs nodding. She changes the subject and tells me stories of what happened since I was gone. She told me Toby and Clary were now going out. I could not help but laugh. She laughs with me and looks to the right, pass me. She elbows my arm.
"What?" I ask and she flicks her head.
"Look" she says and I do so. I knew who she looking at. Riley.
He was laughing walking backwards towards the school. He was talking to a few people. They seemed ready to head for the east entrance. He waved at them and turned to face forward. They stood there laughing at something Riley said and his eyes find mine. He freezes for a moment and doesn't move. Someone -Tyler- pats his shoulder laughing and Riley looks at him to smile.
I look at Patty. "What should I do?" i ask her and she shrugs
"Anything he's cute" she says and i give her a look and she smirks. I take in a deep breath.
"If anything i was in Switzerland taking care of distant family members with now phone service" I say and she nods as if she already knows.
"Girl listen honey I got your back. Please just go get your man already!" she says and I laugh a little. She gently touches my shoulder. "Go" she says and I look over.
The crowd separates from him, he was laughing a bit and he looks at me. I steer away from Patty and he detaches from the crowd.
"So," he says as I grow closer. "How was Switzerland?" he asks and I shake my head. "Awful" I say and let my book bag fall right off of my shoulder. I wrap my arms around him and pull him down to hug him. I don't care what catty girl sees me I'd have Patty to tell them to go somewhere. He was a bit shocked at first hesitant then hugs me back.
"I'm really glad your back" he says and I let the air escape my lungs.
"Me too" I say.
When I let go the sleeve to my jacket rises and he catches my arm. "What happened?" he asks I force a smile and wiggle my arm from his grip. "It was an accident" I say and he raises his eyebrows at me. "Fell of our family horse" I say.\
I had a lot to explain during creative writing class. Mr.Stevens overall was thrilled to see me. It took a lot to make him not suspicious if that even makes sense. It turned out he put a pause on the Writing Assignment to writing techniques because everyone really need them the past few weeks. But as soon as Halloween was over he was going to go back to it. I had a lot of catching up to do but I didn't care. I was home that was all that mattered. When Patty saw me after school she winked and walked the other way. Leaving me to talk to Riley. He asked about Switzerland I lied my butt off of course That's how Ben would say it. Butt because he can't curse. I wouldn't let him. He wouldn't dare. I stopped in front of the gate leading to my house.
"Thanks" I say and he nods.
"Anytime," he says and we fall silent. "You're not going to be disappearing again before Halloween?" he asks and I laugh.I shake my head.
"No fortunately" i say an he nods.
"Good because I wanted to ask you something" he says and I type the code in to open the gate then look at him.
"There's this Halloween party and I have to bring a guest. I was wondering if maybe you'd like to go" he say and I look at him. I bite hard on the inside of my cheek. Don't you dare smile Tess. I'll kill you.
"Um," I say and look down. My eyes rise and find him again. I nod. "Sure it sounds like fun" I say and push the gate open still looking at him.
"Great" he says and walks still looking backward at me.
"See you at school tomorrow?" he asks and I smile a little with the confidence to say "Ya"
When I walk in mom waits at the head of the stares almost cursing me with the look in her eyes.
"Who was that?" she asks and begins to descend the staircase.
"A friend" I say and drop my book bag on the floor.
She raises an eyebrow. "I see" she says bitterly though gritted teeth. "Ben" she shouts once and BEn arrives at the staircase.
"Let's go. We need to buy things for the house" she says and aims for the door. I try to sneak up the staircase.
"You too Tess " she says and opens the front door. I swear to myself and turn around.
"Let's go" she says and by the dazed evil look in her eyes I already know. She's far from sober.