*(Is this all we see?)*

~*Chapter 47*~

**Mentions of Sexual Assault. Mentions and scenes of Attempted suicide/thoughts of suicide and self harm**

Midnight sprung up. His body was covered in sweat and he felt severe jitters hit him everywhere. That memory killed him, it could have. It always killed him thinking about it.

He looked to his side. Nick was sprawled all on his bed, his cheek squished against the pillow, drool spilling onto the surface. Midnight flopping his legs off of the bed, stepping unsteadily onto the ground. His legs were jello, shaking when touched. He stood, his body felt numb as he started to try and walk. Shaking, he reached the outside of his friends room. The hall was drowned in darkness, but he couldn't even see anyway; the tears forming ponds in his eyes made it hard to see. He held the wall, fingertips gripping the ridged walls. He soon caught the railing, grabbing it when his feet found the stairs.

He walked. Stumbled down the stairs. The downstairs was dim, a lamp next to the main couch was on and the rest of the lights were off. Midnight walked shakily through the living room and to the kitchen. He saw the sink first. Hands clutched the next edge he could find. The counter. Midnight gripped the sink once he got to it. The metal clink made his ears tingle. His breaths labored, hot and heavy. His tears fell onto the sinks floor, falling down the drain. 'Breath. Breath.' He tried to tell himself. 'Deep breaths. Don't wake anyone up.'

Midnight looked up to a handle. Were there cups? With his other hand he grabbed the handle to flap it open, he grabbed the first cup he saw and threw it under the faucet, turning it on. The cup slammed into his lips, water trickling down his burning throat. He tried to take more breaths. 'I am being so annoying. Pointless and--'

Looking over to the side of the cabinent he saw a bottle. A bottle of pills. Prescription pills. He stared at it for a moment, his negative thoughts starting to edge to the surface. He placed the cup on the counter to grab the bottle. 'Mari Alexander. Take three times a day for--' He couldn't read the rest. He tried to blink. 'Put it down this is none of your buisness.'

But what if--

Midnight shook his head, the bottle rolled out of his hand and rattled to the floor. His hands pressed on his head. 'Stop. Quiet down. You will be okay.'

"Midnight?"

A raspy voice burst into his ears, followed by footsteps approaching him. "Midnight?" the voice repeated. The steps came closer. "Midnight are you..okay?"

"I'm--" He swallowed deeply. "I'm fine. Just--a little shaken up."

"Why are you shaken up?" Nick asked. Midnight could hear him make a sound of protest and fold his arms. Midnight didn't, and couldn't look at him. Midnight grabbed the cup back, throwing more water down his throat.

"Midnight what is going on?"

"Nothing!" His voice started to sound like a broken sob. His voice cracked. He gulped more water, shoving it again under the faucet. More water plundered down his burning pipes.

"Midnight look at me." He shook his head quickly in refusal. Nick stepped closer. He was almsot in front of him. Midnights eyes looked up slightly. He could only see the bottom of Nick but he could tell he was suspicous. He knelt down to where the pill bottle had rolled. "Midnight this is my moms--it's usually locked in the.." He heard his slight 'ooh.'

"Midnight what were you..." He sounded emotional now. Midnight wanted to stay quiet. "Were you going to take these?"

"No." Midnight rubbed his arm along his nose to clear it. He folded his arms like Nick did. Nick observed the bottle. "Please, don't lie to me." His breathing was almost as loud as his own. "I'm not lying Nick."