Mismatched Paramour

CHAPTER 31 - FLASHBACKS

CHAPTER 31 – FLASHBACKS

Nagising akong nasa puting kwarto. I know I am inside a hospital because I've been here several times. Sa private clinic ni Dr. Renyel, ang private doctor ni mom.

There's another reason kung bakit ako nagising. Someone is talking loudly inside the room, it's my mother and Dr. Renyel himself. Hindi nila napansing gising na ako kaya nanatili lang akong nakatingin sa puting kisame habang nakikinig sa kanila.

Also there's someone sleeping beside me.

Si Vlad.

Natutulog sya habang nakaupo sa maliit na upuan at nakahawak sa kamay kong sinasandahan ng kanyang mukha.

"Akala ko ba tuluyan na nyang malilimutan iyon? She possible can't remember those times right?" dinig kong tanong ni Mom sa kabilang partition. Nahahati lang ng kurtina ang bawat compartment ng clinic kaya dinig ko lahat ng pinag uusapan nila.

"We can't be sure about that Mrs. Chen. Trauma isn't something we should take lightly."

"I'm not taking it lightly! I'm totally worried about her kaya ako nagkakaganto! What's the other option? Can't you give her medicine para tuluyan ng mawala ang lahat? Ayokong maalala nya ulit ang lahat."

"I'm sorry, but there's no cure for amnesia." Sagot ni Dr. Renyel. "We've anticipated this Mrs. Chen. I told you before na possibleng unti unting babalik ang mga alaala nya. I thought it might take months but it can take decades also before it could return. I can only give her anti depressant for her anxiety kapag baka sakaling bumalik ulit. That's all I can do. For now, you should distant her from the things that can trigger her trauma. She might faint again due to stress."

Anti depressant? Trauma? And amnesia?

"Do I have an amnesia?" tanong ko kaya bahagya silang nagulat. Maging si Vlad at nagising din kaya agad ko ring kinuha ang kamay ko sa kanya. My mom's eyes literally went wide nang mabilis nyang binuksan ang kurtina. Na parang nakakita ng multo dahil sa gulat.

"Jiane, you're awake!"she exclaimed. Agad din syang lumapit sa akin. "Are you okay? Does your head hurt?"

"Tell me, do I have an amnesia?" tanong ko ulit kay mom. Silence fell the room, she didn't answer me.

"You fainted because of stress. It's not amnesia---" lintana ni Vlad.

"Tumahimik ka Vlad. Hindi ikaw ang kinakausap ko." Giit ko. He tried to give us space kaya lumabas muna sya ng clinic. Maging si Dr. Renyel ay kusa nang lumabas ng kanyang opisina. They left us para makapag usap kami ng maayos.

"Do I have an amnesia? Kailan pa?" tanong ko ulit. Kahit hindi nya sinagot ang tanong ko. She just say I'm sorry Jiane. I already knew what she means. I was stunned, ayokong maniwala sa narinig ko.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to get angry dahil tinago nya sakin ang lahat. But I was still confused.

"How?" tanong ko.

"Seven years ago. After of what happened to Diane." Wala akong maintindihan.

"But I can still remember everything. Naalala ko ang lahat ng ginawa ko kay Diane. She killed herself because of me."

It's a tragedy.

"It wasn't because of you! Why do you keep blaming yourself?!"

"It's because of me! Kaya paano ako nagkaroon ng amnesia kung naaala ko pa ang lahat ng nangyari?!" sigaw ko.

I still remember the pain, her suffering and mine. Kung hindi dahil sakin ay hindi mangyayari ang lahat ng bagay na iyon.

"That's it! Yan lang ang gusto mong alalahanin, ang pagkamatay nya. You're forgetting a lot of people Jiane. You force yourself to forgot the people you treasured the most. Naalala mo ba ang iba mong kaibigan seven years ago?"