Red Desire | Kylo Ren x Reader

Your Body Says Otherwise

*Please be cautious- this could be triggering for some folks*

The next few days were as normal as ever- well as normal as they could be when you worked on a giant frozen weapon of a planet. Your shifts in the medbay were busier than usual though. With all of the drama going around about the prisoner escaping the finalizer, there was talk of invasions and raids taking place to show the power of the First Order. Personally, you thought it was all a little ridiculous, but you were thankful that the workdays went by quickly.

As it got closer to when you'd have to see the Commander, you got more and more anxious thinking about it. You still didn't know what you were going to be doing there. Were you supposed to go there after your shift? Or just not go to your normal shift at all?

It's not like you could ask him any questions. Or ask anyone else about it.

It had to be some big secret, obviously, because the Commander can't show weakness.

You wished you could tell Max about it. There wasn't a secret that he didn't know about you and not one you didn't know about him. It just didn't feel right keeping something like this from him, but you knew you would both be in trouble if you ever said anything to anyone- so you stayed quiet.

On the day you were to head to new medbay, you woke to a message on your datapad that said you were to spend your whole shift there. Grumbling, you got ready, pulling on your gray scrubs just like you did every day. Grabbing your datapad, you turned to look at yourself in your mirror before leaving.

You looked exceptionally ordinary.

There was nothing that could hide your dark undereye bags. They made you look so much older and sadder. The gray of your scrubs washed you out. Your hair sat plainly on your head and you wished it was different.

Pouting slightly, you walked out of your room. Getting into the elevator, you leaned against the wall. A sadness you hadn't felt for a long time crept over you as a tear rolled down your cheek.

Hopelessness.

You straightened up as the doors slid open with a chime and you stepped into the chilled hallway. The goosebumps on your skin a nice reminder of how cold the planet was. Walking through the large black doors that led into the medbay, you forced a smile on your face as you passed the assistant at the desk.

You pushed open the door to Room 3 and walked over to the couch. The room was empty and silent except for the crackle of the fireplace. After around 10 minutes of sitting there staring at your hands, you stood up and walked around the room. It was dark, as was everything in it, except for the brightly colored bookends. Walking along the bookshelves, you ran your hand along the various books.

Landing on a large red book, you slid it out from the shelf. It was heavy, but had a pretty rose picture engraved on the front. Looking around the room, even though no one was there, you opened the book. The pages were colored with age as you flipped through them. Deciding you wanted to read it, you carried it over to the couch and sat down. Curling your feet up underneath you as you began to read.

There was a knock at the door and the assistant let themselves in. Looking at you, without saying a word, they set a pile of black clothing at the end of the couch you were sitting on and left.

Setting the book down and scrunching your face in confusion, you reached for the clothing and held it up. It was an all-black version of the scrub outfit you were currently wearing. Assuming this was the hint to change, you stood up and set the large book down.

Stripping your gray attire off your body, you were concentrating on your balance as you reached for the clothing and you didn't notice the figure standing in the corner, watching you.