Will and Nico

Part 15

NICO

I can't stop thinking about him and it's killing me. It's driving me insane. I don't want to like him. But I really do. I want to be with him. I want to be around him. But I don't let myself.
He kissed me. He likes me. I can't indulge myself. I can't go there. I avoid him every chance I get, and steer clear of the infirmary.
But as days go on, avoiding Will isn't my biggest problem. I can't sleep. At all. As soon as I close my eyes I jerk awake and am too scared to even try going back to sleep. I'm not eating, can't stomach anything. Can't keep anything down. I feel utterly broken.
A knock comes at my door and I ignore it. Praying it'll go away.
'Dude, open up.' It's Percy, and I know that he won't go away. I stand up and grudge over to the door. I'm only in tracksuits, not caring enough to pull a shirt on. I open the door.
'What?' I ask.
'You've been awol for days. What's going on?' He asks, stepping into my cabin. Percy is more or less the only camper who has no regard for other people's cabins. Everyone else keeps to themselves, but he invites himself in everywhere.
'Nothing.' I say, bluntly. He can tell I'm in a bad mood, but he doesn't go.
'Have you been eating?' He asks.
'Yes.' I lie. He narrows his eyes.
'Sleeping?'
'Percy, seriously.' I say, 'I'm fine.'
'Do one burpee.' He says.
'What?'
'One burpee.' He says again, 'and I'll leave.'
I'm hesitant. I'm sure there's some ulterior motive. But I give in. I go down to the floor, push my legs up and jump up, only to black out for a moment.
When I wake, Percy has lifted me over his shoulder and takes me outside.
'Percy put me down.' I insist.
'You're going to the infirmary.' He says.
'I'm fine.' 
'No you're not.' He says again.
'Percy.' I say, hitting him in the back.
'If you were fine, you would be able to get out of this easily.' He argues.
He takes me into the infirmary and sits me on an empty bed. Will comes over and freezes when he sees me.
'I don't think he's been sleeping or eating.' Percy says to Will.
'Have you?' He asks me. I shrug.
'Nico.' Percy prompts.
'I don't know.' I say, quietly.
'You don't know?' Percy asks.
'Percy, do you mind...?' Will asks. Percy looks at me, clearly concerned, but leaves as Will suggests. It's just him and me, 'so how many hours of sleep have you been getting?'
I don't answer at first, but he waits for me. 'None.' I say.
'At all?' He asks. I shrug.
'Since when?' Again I don't answer at first.
'Capture the flag.' I say. The night we kissed. He doesn't seem to react.
'And you haven't been eating?' He asks.
'I don't know.' I say.
'You don't know?'
'I don't remember.' I say, 'it all kind of...it kind of blurs.'
'Right.' He says. I look at him, finally, and he just looks worried. I look away quickly, 'I was working on something. We can try it out. You shouldn't have any dreams.'
'None?' I ask, still wary.
'None.' He promises.
'Okay.' I say. He has the injection again. He holds out his hand, and I extend my arm. He holds it, gently.
His other hand traces the inside of my elbow, looking for a vein. It tickles slightly. He puts the injection in and I fight my impulse to clutch his shoulder like I did before.
'How do you feel?' He asks me. He won't meet my eyes. My head feels heavy. The injection starts breaking down all the barriers I'd put up.
'Sorry.' I say. He looks up.
'Why?'
'I'm not...good.' I say. I feel like I'm making sense, but my head is spinning. I can barely get out a sentence.
'You're not good?' Will asks.
'At this.' I say, 'I'm not good.'
'You're not good at this.' Will repeats. I shake my head. I think I catch him smile a little, but I'm so far gone at that point that I really can't tell.
'I'm scared to sleep.' I say.
'I'll be here.' He insists, 'I'll wake you up if you look scared.'
'Promise?' I ask, but I'm already closing my eyes. I can't fight it.
'Promise.' He says.