Outerbanks Imagine

You don't care about me - Rafe Cameron

"So then teach me! Teach me how to dance, how to love, how to care, because clearly, I don't know how!"

"You can't just learn this by a book, Rafe. You learn by seeing it, by experiencing it!" You yelled back at him. It wasn't the first argument you were in and you were getting tired of it. It was always about the same thing: Rafe ignoring you or not showing he cared about you at all. He beat up your friends right in front of you, he ignored you for days only to come back crying to you when he got into a fight with his dad.

"I've never had love in my life, Y/N. My dad never taught me anything. He never learned me how to ride a bike. He just gave me one, said what to do and that was it. I've never had someone in my life to teach me things. But I love you Y/N. I love you and I want to be there for you, but it clearly doesn't seem enough."

"If you love me, then why don't you pick up the phone when I call or text me back? Why do you spend all your time with your friends and ignore me, only to come to me when you're sad, had a fight with your dad or you're hungover? Why only then? How does it feel, Rafe. How does love feel?" You knew you weren't being fair to me. You knew how hard he tried to be there for you, but there was so much more going on that you probably didn't even know about, so now is the time to get it all straight or you might lose your mind. You love this guy with all your heart, but boy it's exhausting.

"It feels like... it's..." Rafe ran his hands through his hair. "I don't know. Every time I think of you, my heart starts to beat faster and that's like, all the time. You're on my mind every second of the day. I like the way your smile grows wider when you're truly happy. You're perfect in every way and I just can't stop thinking about you. I want to make you proud Y/N. I want to make you feel safe and I want you to feel the same way about me."

You could hear that he really meant it. It made you weak hearing how much he cared for you, but it made it even harder to understood why he ignored you all the time. "You say all those things now, but as soon as I'm gone and I text you when I'm home, you won't respond. So why am I on your mind all the time, but you ignore me?"

"God, I don't know! If I would, I won't be doing it!" You just looked at him, not knowing what to say. You were so done with all the fighting.

"If you don't know, then how am I supposed to help you?" He didn't answer your question. "Call me when you know," you said and stormed off. You heard him yell for you, but you didn't respond. You got into you car and went home.

You let yourself fall on the hammock in the garden. You put on your sunglasses and closed your eyes.

"Rough day?" You turned your head and saw Topper leaning against a tree.

"Wonderfull," you mumbled sarcastically, not in the mood to talk to him. "You could say it that way," you sighed to him.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Nope. Go bother someone else, Top. I'm not in the mood."

"Got into a fight with Rafe again?"

"I'm not talking to you about this. Go talk to him. Talk some sense into him or something." You heard him walk off and you said. You laid down in the hammock and thought of all the good times you had with Rafe. You loved him so much and you knew he loved you, but you wished he would show it to you. For all these months, you've been the one to suggest to go on a date, to do fun things or call him at night when you couldn't sleep. He only had called you a few times, but only when he needed you for something. You knew you needed to stay away from him, but you just loved him way too much. If he wanted to make this right, he would need to try so fucking hard.

"Y/N. Can I talk to you?" You didn't look up when you heard his voice. Should you gave him the same treatment he would always give you? Maybe that thought him how you felt. He wanted to be taught how to love, so let's get started on that then.

"Y/N please."

"Not in the mood," you snapped at him. You got out of the hammock and walked passed him inside the house. You opened the fridge and got yourself a bottle of water. Rafe just stood outside, not sure what to do. But then you saw him walk into the kitchen. Was he finally understanding?

"I know you're mad at me. I treated you like shit and I'm sorry. I really am. I know it's not going to fix anything, but can you please just hear me out?"

"You're talking to me?" You asked him. There wasn't anyone in the room, but you pretended you weren't listening to him at all. He would say this so much to you and now it was the perfect excuse to use it back at him.

"Are you serious right now Y/N? I'm trying to talk to you! I'm trying to apologize for what I did."

"Hmm, didn't hear you." You walked away to the living room and put on the tv. He groaned in annoyance and you knew how much he hated this. But you were not going to give in. He walked to the tv and stood right in front of it, blocking your view to the Kardashians.

"Can you move? I'm trying to watch this," you said bitter and pointed at the tv. You still had your sunglasses on and you were glad he couldn't see the look in your eyes.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You can watch this grab another time. I'm talking to you." You just ignored him and went to sit somewhere else so you could see the tv. He moved in front of you again. You moved and so did he. You went about it for ten minutes and you were done with it. You walked back outside and sat down on the lounge set.

"God, Y/N. Can you stop acting like a child?"

"Oh so you're allowed to act like this towards me, but when I do it, I get called a child?" You said in all seriousness and pulled the sunglasses from your face. Rafe was silent for a moment.

"I don't ac-."

"Yes, you do. You do it all the time and it's even worse that you don't realize it. You're the child here Rafe and I'm not your mom. So no, I'm not going to teach you anything. You did this, so you fix it. You teach yourself like you've always done, because apparently you're the god of the house. So now leave me alone. I'm over all this shit," you said and put your sunglasses back on your face. You were hard on him, but it was just how you felt. This was the last thing and you were done with it. You couldn't handle this for any longer.

"I'm not going anywhere," Rafe said and sat down across from you. "I'm sorry for acting like... a child. It' stupid. I just... push people away when they come close to me. I'm scared, Y/N. Because what if you end up leaving me like my mom did, or hating me like my dad. I can't handle that Y/N, so I push people away. You the most."

You didn't say anything. Rafe has never been this honest to you and he has never told you about how he truly feels, so all you wanted to do was hug him and say that everything would be okay, but you stayed in your place. "Please, tell me what I can do to fix it." He was practically begging you right now.

"Don't push me away again. Start making it up to me. Treat me like I'm the queen of your life. Just show me that you care." And so he did. You didn't forgive him, not now at least, but he did showed you that he cared. It started by taking you out to dinner, then a walk along the beach. You spend days on the boat him and his family. He took you with him to parties. You had fun together. He showed you that he did care about you.